EBW World

Nerma: Welcome back EBW faithful, for another EBW World! I really need to get home and pack, but they say I need to record these, and blah blah blah, here I am. Yeah Steve, I know about obligations dammit! I AM excited! We're going to Edo for the E1! It's being titled the "E1 Sengoku War", and I couldn't be more excited after seeing these blocks. There IS some controversy though. Let's start with the blocks and we'll get to the controversy later.

Block A
--------------------
Tack Angel
Hotlanta
Firebrand X
Kinniku Mike
Maurice
Generator

Block B
--------------------
Trevor Mach
Bashin Dan
Cade
Amigo
Dirk Laramie
Grind

Nerma: So as you can see, you've got your Bad Dudes. You've got representation from The Legion. You've got Challenge Champion Cade and Bashin Dan. You've got Neon Rookie Cup Winner Dirk Laramie. You've got the Paradise Collection. What's missing? That's right, the EBW Triple Crown World Champion Mav Valentine. Our young champ wanted to make a run for winning the E1 as World Champion, a feat that has yet to be accomplished. For some reason, he was taken out of the Tournament. Let's see if we can find out why.

Noah Jennings

Noah Jennings: *on the phone* Don't worry sugar, Daddy is coming home, and he needs his chocola-

Mav Valentine: What the hell is this?!

Noah Jennings: ....I got to go honey. Mav, what's the problem?

Mav Valentine: The problem?! I'm not in the E1 Climax! That's the problem!

Noah Jennings: Umm....well...I thought I was doing you a favor.

Mav Valentine: How could that possibly help me?

Noah Jennings: Well you've been challenged by Swift. If you accept his challenge, you'll be putting the title on the line at the end of the Climax in the Kyoto Dome. That could be your biggest match yet, in front of the biggest audience you've had yet. If you run the E1 gauntlet then you wouldn't-

Mav Valentine: What? Be at my best? I'm always at my best. I won't settle for less. I AM going to accept Swift's challenge, and I was going to participate in the E1 Climax as the Triple Crown World Champion. I know about the Champion's Privilege to opt out, and I wanted no part of it. 

Noah Jennings: I thought you did though. w00t said-

Mav Valentine: w00t said? He's been trying undermine my reign, and everything I try to do, because I don't want to play ball with that prick! I'm not doing things his way, and neither should you. Heh, I told myself I wasn't coming into this office anymore. I was going to do things my way, but maybe I need to sit around and wait for w00t to show up. He can spout more bullshit, and I'll take that stapler on your desk and mash it into his face a few times!

Noah Jennings: Not necessary! We can put you in a spot if-

Mav Valentine: It's too late. I'm not going to be the dick that deprives someone else of their spot. That tournament is too important. It's the most important tournament. I will say this though, you're making a huge mistake trying to abdicate your duties to w00t or Orange Man. w00t is a villain, and I know from personal experience. Orange Man? He could probably get things done, but people hate him with such vitriol it makes them act like complete idiots perpetually. For some reason he turns normal, rational people, into the biggest bastards on Earth. You're asking for trouble either way. Get it together!

Noah Jennings: .....

-

Nerma: The champion is NOT happy about this situation, but respect is deserved for not booting someone else out of their spot. We're watching the kid grow into his role in real time, and it's great to see. We end this update with the card for Xperience. It will be the last XP before we make our way to Edo, so get your tickets, and we'll see you in Saturn City! This should be one to see, with a Neon Championship match, and a main event battle for the EBW World Team Championship Rings. The fearsome foursome are finally back in full force to defend them, so it should be an exciting match up. Don't miss it!

EBW: Xperience
Renegade Arena, Saturn City
ENN

1. Singles: Bobby Blitzworth vs. Vape
2. Singles: Dirk Laramie vs. Rude
3. Women's Singles: Sunny Malibu vs. Sylvie
4. EBW Neon Championship: Grind(c) vs. Generator vs. Javier Leos vs. Fray Tiburon
5. Women's 4-Way: Gold vs. Alison Chains vs. Eve vs. Kimber Blaze
6. 6-Woman Tag: Christina Angel/Tracy Angel/Nani Angel vs. Erica/Kaie/Troian
7. EBW World Team Championship: Trevor Mach(c)/Tack Angel(c)/Firebrand X(x)/Subculture(c) vs. w00t/Cade/Cadmus/Hotlanta

Saturn City Hospital

Hope Mach awoke again, in a now silent world. She once again saw Bashin Dan, sitting beside her, looking like he hadn't slept. She smiled and held his hand. She wanted to say how grateful she was to him, but to tell him to get some sleep. However, she was now more self conscious than before about that fact that she would be unaware of the sound of her voice.

Bashin Dan: I know what you're thinking. I can tell by your face. You see the bags under my eyes right? Don't looks so surprised. I may not be able to read lips like you, but I know how to read an opponent. I'm glad you're awake, because I wanted to talk to you about something, just you and me. Can you understand me alright?

Hope Mach: *nods*

Bashin Dan: I used to think life was all about mastering my card game, and then that changed. It's not just about this deck of cards. It's not just about what we do in the ring. This might be shocking from me, but it's not just about friendship either.

Hope Mach: *gasp*

Bashin Dan: I know. I know. Coming from me, that's crazy. It's about the connection that you and I have. A connection that makes me want to do something crazy, just for you. You won't allow it though, I already know. I have to have your consent before they'll do it. It's procedure, using a matching donor to give you hearing. Degrees came up with it. The drawback is that the donor will be deaf. If it's something I can do, and it is, then it's something I want to do, and I will, but only if-

Hope Mach: *shaking no*

Bashin Dan: See? I knew you'd feel that way. I can't imagine anyone would just be cool with that. I just...I want this for you...so much. I don't want you to lose your hearing forever. I have to admit something. For a long time before we became....closer friends, I watched old tapes of you. You seemed so happy and confident, whether you could hear or not. It inspiring. Then, I saw what happened when you COULD hear, and it was like it changed your world. I can't imagine it will be easy to go back to that old confidence. I know you can, and I know you would, but I don't want you to have to. It's not fair to you. I-

Hope Mach: *holds up her finger and clears her throat* I...can....do this. I won't....let it....stop me. Am I...too loud?

Bashin Dan: Heh...a little, but it's nice to hear you voice again.

Hope Mach: If....you did this....you'd....never hear it again.

Bashin Dan: That's a sacrifice, I'd be willing to me. I wanted to make a wager with you actually, over a game of Battle Spirits. If I win, you consent to the procedure. If you win, I'll never bring it up again. You know me, so you know I'd take this very seriously. Plus, you know how much it matters to me, if I'm busting out the deck.

Hope Mach: ....I'm going to....kick your ass. Heh.

Bashin Dan: Yeah? Heh. You're pretty good, I'll give you that much, but I'm the heart of the cards.

Hope Mach: What...will you do....when you lose?

Bashin Dan: You ARE confident. If I lost....I guess....I guess I'd become a master of sign language?

Hope smiled for the first time in days as a tear fell down her face.

The Mach Residence

Trevor stretched out his shoulders and stepped into the shower as Lady M's was using it.

Trevor Mach: I missed this.

Lady M's: You're covered in blood.

Trevor Mach: You're covered in soapy suds.

Lady M's: Why are you covered in blood?

Trevor Mach: Most of it isn't mine.

Lady M's: Oh, well that's a relief, but the question still stands.

Trevor Mach: A fight in the Cathedral.

Lady M's: Huh...for once I wish I went to Mass. Sounds fun.

Trevor Mach: You bet. You want to go visit Hope after we get cleaned up?

Lady M's: Dan's with her tonight, and every night for that matter. If I didn't trust him to be a pure idiot I might break his face.

Trevor Mach: ...He's a good kid.

Lady M's: I guess. I need to figure out who did this. It has to be Duvalie, but I'm going to keep investigating. You don't fuck with my kids like that.

Trevor Mach: Speaking of which, where is Justice?

Lady M's: Millie's got him.

Trevor Mach: Who?

Lady M's: Some girl.

Trevor Mach: Oh alright. No wait, maybe elaborate.

Lady M's: Call her an intern. She's good with....well shit in general.

Trevor Mach: ....Aight.

Lady M's: I needed some time to figure everything out and clear my head.

Trevor Mach: You want me to leave.

Lady M's: ...Not especially.

Trevor Mach: I think I feel the baby kicking. This soon? Wow. What a kick.

Lady M's: I think it's a knee actually.

Trevor Mach: That's my girl!

Lady M's: So what are you doing?

Trevor Mach: Taking a shower, and staring at your pregnancy ti-

Lady M's: I meant about EBW. What's the plan? You're War Wolf with no war to fight.

Trevor Mach: Plenty of wars to be had in the E1. I'm going to win it, and challenge the champ. I just want to be the Bad Man now. The War Wolf can take a break for a while.

Lady M's: Whenever you're gone, you come back stranger and stranger I swear.

Trevor Mach: Is that bad?

Lady M's: No. It's just very....you.

Trevor Mach: Luckily, that's what I was going for.

Lady M's: Heh. You're such a weird-

As Trevor and M's exited the shower, Trevor looked at the bed for the first time since coming back and noticed a crudely drawn picture of him on a body pillow.

Trevor Mach: ....

Lady M's: Uh....

Trevor Mach: Is that me?

Lady M's: ....It's EXACTLY what it looks like.

Trevor Mach: ....And I'm the weirdo? Honk honk!

Crystal Heaven

Tack was sitting atop the tallest crystal tower in his kingdom, looking down as his wives and pirates played with the children in the field.

Shepard: You seem down sir.

Tack Angel: Can you tell? Thought I was hiding it well.

Shepard: You've been openly sobbing for about an hour. Sorry sir.

Tack Angel: I just....I love my family so much, and I'm afraid they don't realize it. I focus too much on other things sometimes. I didn't realize that I might be hurting them by seeking out more wives.

Shepard: ...You didn't?

Tack Angel: No.

Shepard: It didn't cross your mind.

Tack Angel: Not once.

Shepard: Not once?

Tack Angel: Not once.
 
Shepard: Really.

Tack Angel: Yes!

Shepard: Huh. Sir, may I be bold for a moment? You are the Star Prince. You have your own Kingdom full of wonders and wives. You have children, and an army of Pirates. The ghost of Paul Linde, and a Wall Dad. Don't forget the penguins. You are accomplished in your sport of choice, professional wrestling. You have a lot to be grateful for. *looks to camera* A lot Tack. You should rejoice in it.

Tack Angel: You're right!

Shepard: That's the spirit!

Tack Angel: I can find more wives later!

Shepard: We're losing focus immediately.

Tack Angel: I will let the wives know how much I love them right now! I'll spend the day strutting my stuff for them, and being the awesome husband I know I can be.

Shepard: We're going to call this a win. However sir, I DO need to talk to you about the Starlight Kni-

Tack Angel: Later Shepard! I have a family to love!

Shepard: ...Oh boy.




A strutting Tack slipped some shades on, and fixed the chains around his blue turtleneck as he approached Faris. He danced with her for a second and popped the finger guns at her before joining her on the ship to wash it with the rest of the pirates. As they enjoyed each other's company, Tack leaned back on a post that wasn't there and fell into the lake. The dragon Syldra accidentally swallowed him, and spit him out. He flew out of the lake and into the side of a tree.

Later, he saw Makoto making dinner. He strutted up to her, and danced up against her, before grabbing a knife to chop carrots. Doing some tricks, she blushed and laughed, as the two were having a great time. While trying to impress Makoto, he looked over at her and winked, cutting off the tip of his thumb with the knife. He ran out screaming and ran into the side of a tree.

Later still, he saw Tracy and Nani training in the ring. He waltzed over with his bandaged thumb and volunteered to help. The girls battered and stretched him, in the opposite scenario he was hoping for, though he blacked out smiling when a double choke smothered him in breasts. When he awoke he was outside, and immediately bolted up and smacked into the side of a tree.

Amy used Tack's help with the bills later on, but as she rattled on numbers he began to fall asleep. Amy looked over and smiled, kissed him on the forehead and let him sleep. Minutes later he bolted awake, fell back in his chair, rolled down the stairs, out of the door, and smacked into the side of a tree.

Later, Tack was chopping down the tree and icing down his injuries, when he realized that Iroha was still stuck in the room alone. He grabbed up some roses and walked into the room. Hours of shouting later, he sulked out of the room, and walked back up with pickles and ice cream. She actually wanted twinkies, so she tossed him out of the window, rolling him to the ground, tripping over the stump of the tree....and into another tree.

Later the whole family cuddled together in bed, and a bruised and possibly concussed Tack smiled, a single tooth falling out of his mouth as he slipped into a peaceful coma.

Studio B - Backstage

Ted Pettentool: Wow guys, this Studio is something huh? I sure I hope I don't do a silly pratfall! Aw, I'm just kidding of course, but I'm here with Subculture, the Television Champion! Tonight, he's going to be defending against Cadmus, isn't that right?

Subculture: Well you just said it right? Yeah, that's what's happening. I wouldn't be here otherwise. I'd be on an airplane with my wife, trying to get a little rest before the E1, but there is NO rest for the Green Bomber apparently. Nah, Jennings would rather let w00t call the shots here. You know he has to be responsible for this. I thought they were doing an election, but they're already acting like Orange Man has lost, and w00t's just doing his thing huh? Well, it's bullshit, but I'll fight the fights I'm given. It's what I do.

Ted Pettentool: Well that's great to hear. It's exciting that-

Subculture: Watch out for that banana peel!

Ted Pettentool: WHOA!

Subculture: Oh shit! He just fell down a flight of stairs? Is he alright Steve? Steve? Oh....oh he looks dead. Is he dead?





Tommy Dukes: Welcome to Studio B, for another one of our Neon Nights! A lot of our talent are already on the way to Edo, but some of us remembered that we have ONE MORE show to do! They never respect the C Show!

Apple Kid: Do WE respect the C Show?

Tommy Dukes: I'm really trying to.

Apple Kid: I like it when we have Muscle Girls in the Studio. I always respect that.

Tommy Dukes: What?

Apple Kid: Did you know Eve is selling bottles of water she drank out of? It's be weird to buy right? Haha.

Tommy Dukes: Dammit man, get a hold of yourself! You're a scientist!

Apple Kid: I bought it! I admit it! I can't help myself!

Tommy Dukes: Weirdo!

Backstage

Tack was standing around backstage, when Makoto came out of the dressing room, wearing her old sailor fuku, thought it looked two sizes too small.

Makoto Angel: Uh...this is really really tight.

Tack Angel: ...I noticed.

Makoto Angel: Why are you wanting me to wear this again?

Tack Angel: Thought it'd be FUN for the trip. We're heading out right after the show.

Makoto Angel: Why are we even here? None of us are booked? Is it because of the TackForce? You're a great lea-

Tack Angel: Huh? TackForce? Oh yeah....that....nonsense. No, I'm here because Trevor's here, and he asked to meet about something.

Makoto Angel: Well, if you're going to meet, you should put some pants on.

Tack Angel: What the hell?! Where did they-

Makoto Angel: Here he comes.

Tack Angel: Oh Trevor hey! You wanted to-

Trevor ran up and kicked Tack in the balls.

Tack Angel: AH! AH AH! WHY?!
 
Trevor Mach: Tali mentioned your little visit to our house! Hilarious, but I owed you that. See you in Edo dickhead!

Tack Angel: AH! Makoto help me?!

Makoto Angel: What does he think you did Tack?

Tack Angel: Uh...hehe....you're going to laugh about this.

Trevor kept walking out to the ring, as the crowd erupted for his entrance. He entered the ring fired up.

Trevor Mach: The Bad Man is here. I haven't left for Edo yet. I had some unfinished ball kicking to attend to, but now that that's done with, I'm still looking for a fight. I want to remind you all that I'm not just good, or great, I'm BAD. *wink* So come on out....literally anyone. Let's do th-

Chad Salad: You think you're impressive! You think you impress me! I'm not impressed! Trevor Mach returns to hog more of the glory!

Trevor Mach: Don't like it? Tough shit! Get in the ring and do something about it.

Chad Salad: You're really getting on my nerves!

Trevor Mach: Then step up!

Chad Salad: Grrr....Fine! I'll-

EBW: Neon Nights
Studio B, Saturn City
ENN

1. Singles: Trevor Mach beat Chad Salad via Knee Trigger x Kimura -> Submission
-Chad Salad was immediately smashed with the Knee Trigger once he entered the ring. While on the ground, Trevor locked him in the Kimura and forced Chad to tap out.

Tommy Dukes: Well that's that! Damn, that looked painful. I make a salad tossing joke, but it's beneath us both really.

Apple Kid: Is it? Look at me. I'm back on her onlyfans and-

Tommy Dukes: Turn it off! *sigh* Apple Kid is a little indisposed, so I'm going to try and do this solo. Can't wait to get to Edo. *sigh* A good return win for the Bad Man.

2. Tag: Dorado Mask[o]/Hex No Limit beat Saxon[x]/Novus via Doradorana -> Pin
-The TaskForce team of Saxon and Novus took on the Lucha Bastards next up. They had Rey and Valarie Dorado in their corner, while the TackForce kept looking for Tack, to no avail. Basic graps versus the versatility of the luchadors, the match ended with a Doradorana to Saxon for the pin.

Tommy Dukes: A big win there for the Lucha Bastards, but I spent the whole match looking around for Dogma Mask and the other guys. What were they doing on Xperience? Will we see them in Edo? Also, it might just be me, but I'm starting to think that Tack doesn't like these guys.

3. Women's Tag: Jessica James/Jenny James vs. Bev/Raza ended in a Double Count out
-The James Sisters and Muscle Girl Security were up next, in a rematch from their table bout. Tess and M's enforcers clashing once again. More of a brawl than a match like you would expect, the foursome spent most of their time out of the ring, leading a Double Count out. Ironically security had to come out and keep the security apart from each other. More security had to help the security. SO MUCH SECURITY!

Tommy Dukes: Can't say I didn't see that coming. Knowing what I now know about the James Sisters, you need to put them in matches with MINIMAL rules if you want a clean cut outcome. Right Apple?

Apple Kid: ...I want Bev or Raza to like....fall on me....either or....or both at once even?

Tommy Dukes: Oh yeah, I wasn't cutting back to him.


4. Tag: Randy no Kachi/LG Rod[o] beat Misogynist Paul/Robert Sandwich[x] via Bulldog Legdrop -> Pin
-Another tag match with TackForce members, but the much more beloved Heel Besties, just happy, and loving life. They flattened Paul and Sandwich in minutes, with LG Rod dropping the leg on "Yeast Mode" for the pin.

Tommy Dukes: I want to say they're a joy to watch, and they love to have a good time, but that's a death sentence for wrestlers! An absolute DEATH SENTENCE! Just ask Manu Kalani!

Manu Kalani: You don't have to ask me! I'll tell you. It sucks! I got a hot tropical temper! I can be mean and vicious too dammit! Don't make that mistake Tommy! Don't tell the people they love to have a good time! You'll never see them again! I feel like I'm fading right now, because people see me as the fun loving island stereotype!

Tommy Dukes: ...What were you even doing here?

5. EBW Television Championship: Cadmus beat Subculture(c) via Dark Star Cutter -> Pin -> NEW EBW Television Champion!
-Main event time, as Subculture put the Television Championship on the line against the flamboyant Cadmus, who brought his sister Bellerophon to the ring, and as they teased a kiss, everyone in the crowd cringed and looked away. Apple Kid maybe have looked closer though. The Green Bomber may have underestimated Cadmus, as he managed to duck and weave, avoiding the hurting bombs of Subbie. Cadmus took Subculture to the outside, and slammed him into the steps, while Bellerophon was spraying herself with perfume. She pretended to get in way, so Subculture nearly got himself counted out. Back in the ring, he finally landed some body blows, and an off balance Counter Culture, but Cadmus rolled to the ropes and grabbed them As Subculture tried to get him to let go, Bellerophon sprayed him in the face with the perfume. Subculture staggered back, and tried to fight with his eyes irritated. Cadmus let him biff a KO Punch, and hit the Dark Star Cutter, before the 1-2-3. Cadmus with the win, and the Television Championship.

Tommy Dukes: What?! A title change on the C Show?! A title change of THIS MAGNITUDE!? Cadmus is your new Television Champion. Wow! I wasn't expecting this. Of course Cadmus, even though he has improved to be a serious threat, is still deploying theatrics and tricks to win his matches. How did the ref not see that perfume shot?

Apple Kid: He was staring at Bellerophon's near nip slip.

Tommy Dukes: Huh?

Apple Kid: I think she did it on purpose, and it worked, because I homed RIGHT IN on it.

Tommy Dukes: ....I missed it. I want to see that! Can we get a replay? What do you mean no cameras were pointed at it! Useless Lakitus! Dammit she's hot!

Apple Kid: Aren't you afraid your wife is watching?

Tommy Dukes: Nah....nah....it's the C Show.

The Dukes Residence

The window to the top floor apartment opened up, and a television with flew out of it.

Nerma: TOOOOOMMMMMYYYYY!!!!

Last edited by Machismo (8/03/2020 8:09 am)

Airplane

A large airplane was stuck in gridlock, as several members of the EBW crew sat impatiently. Kinniku Mike sat with his head buried in his hands, freaking out.

Sal Paradise: Is he alright? Does he not like flying, or is it the waiting?

Amigo: Hehe. Hehehehe.

Sal Paradise: I don't think I've ever seen you smile, let alone laugh this much.

Amigo: Well, let Mike tell you why.

Sal Paradise: Go ahead Mike? What's wrong. Some little philly break your heart? Did you catch something from said philly? I bet it's-

Kinniku Mike: I have a son.

Sal Paradise: ...I'm sorry what?

Kinniku Mike: I HAVE A SON!

Sal Paradise: ...He...hehe....hehehehehe!

Kinniku Mike: Right, just keep laughing! KEEP LAUGHING! His name is Isiah. He found me while I was waiting for Amigo.

Amigo: Should have gone to the right place.

Sal Paradise: Are you certain?

Kinniku Mike: I mean, I don't have a paternity test or anything, but the kid looked a lot like me.

Amigo: He didn't take the time to inquire much else. When I pulled up he got into the car and said, and I quote "floor it, I can't be a Dad". Hahahaha! I don't know why, but I feel happier than I have in a looooong time.

Maurice: That makes two of us.

Amigo: Maurice? What the hell are you-

Maurice: Can't help that I'm seated in front of you ingrates.

Sal Paradise: Don't start anything on this plane Maurice, or I'll-

Maurice: What? Get kicked in the head again? You're all pathetic. Don't worry, I'm not leaving this seat. I'm getting blitzed and passing out knowing that Mike is in anguish. I'm going to have pleasant dreams.

Amigo: ...That guy is a dick.

Kinniku Mike: Says the guy making fun of me having a son.

Amigo: ...Hehehehe...

Sal Paradise: It's karma baby! Hahaha!

Kinniku Mike: *groan* This can't be happening!

In another part of the plane, Tack was sitting with Amy Angel.

Amy Angel: *sigh* I don't get it Tack. The rest of us are up in first class. Why are we back here?

Tack Angel: There is a reason. Trust me. I have my-

Trevor Mach: Hey Tack, we need to talk brah.

Tack Angel: No way "brah"! Not after that kick!

Trevor Mach: You deserved it! After what you did with-

Tack Angel: Shh!

Amy Angel: What did you do?

Tack Angel: Nothing! It's not big deal. We're cool right?

Trevor Mach: Uh...yeah?

Tack Angel: See? *whispered to Trevor* Thank you.

Trevor Mach: I'm going to sit back with MY family now....in first class. Give me some time to hold Justice, but we HAVE to talk.

Tack Angel: Sure buddy! Later alright?

Trevor Mach: ...Whatever.

Tack Angel: Haha! Bye! I'm so glad he's back and all! Really. I wasn't getting kicked in the pills when he was gone, but really glad he's back.

Amy Angel: He's your best friend. Even I had my issues with him in the past, but I think he's really matured. See him up there? Holding Justice? You can tell that his family matters to him. It matters to him Tack. You get where I'm going with this?

Tack Angel: Hey, you matter to me too. You all matter to me. You mean the world to me. Amy, you were the first. When my heart was broken, you came into my life....and used me for a wrestling angle....but it all worked out!

Amy Angel: I'd like to think allowing the multiple wife option excuses me from my previous actions. You know how lucky you are to have a family like this? We're all really cool with what you're doing.

Tack Angel: Cause it was meant to be. Written in the stars. The Star Prince MUST have his harem.

Amy Angel: If you say so. Ow, my back is really hurting. I really wish you hadn't stolen my bras Tack. I don't feel comfortable being all exposed like this. I think my shirt is ripping too. Is this a size too small?

Tack Angel: Uh....don't worry about all of that. I wanted you like this for a reason. It's time we join the "Mile High Club" eh?

Amy Angel: Ha! Tack, you really are insatiable. What if I say no? Are you going to ask the others? They have the kids so I don't like your chances.

Tack Angel: No, but I'm going to make this droopy, pouty face at you the whole flight.

Amy Angel: .....

Tack Angel: .....

Amy Angel: ....You're not kidding are you?

Tack Angel: .......

Amy Angel: Heh. I don't want to say no. It sounds fun. I don't get to have fun. Though it IS against the law, and as an officer I-

Tack Angel: Brought hand cuffs?

Amy Angel: How did you know?

Tack Angel: All the Angels have their kinks. *wink*

Amy Angel: When you try and wink, it's like you're just blinking. You and Christina both, I swear. Fine Tack, I'm in on your little naughty idea. Guess you could use it before the E1 huh? How do you want to do this?

Tack Angel: I'm going to go to the bathroom right now and reserve it. You come down the hall in a few minutes and knock. I'll knock back so you know it's the right one, and come on in.

Amy Angel: This is ridiculous, but still, sounds fun. Alright go. Heh.

Tack got giddy as he left his seat. He scampered off to the bathroom, running into a sullen Mike on the way.

Tack Angel: Heya Mike!

Kinniku Mike: ....*grumble*

Tack Angel: Boy you said it. Hey, I heard that you're a Dad!

Kinniku Mike: .......

Tack Angel: That's really really really awesome Mike! Being a Dad rules!

Kinniku Mike: .......

Tack Angel: I mean I have an army of pirates and wives to help me raise them, but I'm SURE that you're going to be great at parenting. It's a lot of hard work, but you can do it!

Kinniku Mike: .....

Tack Angel: So much to do. So many responsibilities. I plan to have more myself when Iroha pops out the next five at once, but you-

A suddenly livid Mike grabbing Tack by the shoulders, and kicked him in the groin as hard as he could.

Backstage

Ted Pettentool: Konichiwa everybody! Ted Pettentool here in Edo, with a neck brace on, and don't worry, I'm totally fine. Just two vertebrae that need to be fused together or I'll become paralyzed for life. NOTHING to worry about! I'm good! Great really! How are you? Anyways, I'm joined the Triple Crown World Champion, so let's bring him up!

Mav Valentine: Konichiwa to you Ted, and to the fans watching on Shogun! TV. This should be a tour to remember.

Ted Pettentool: It is very exciting to be here, and to see all of this great action first hand. I've been told that you had the option to take the night off though.

Mav Valentine: Funny how that works right? I seem to get the most time off of any champion. I'm not interested. I don't want it. Look at these scars on my body. Do they make me look like someone who takes a lot of time off? I came from VBW, where I had to work every night in a school gym, just to make enough money to eat and find a place to sleep. I don't need or want the time off. What I want to do is work, and when I work that means w00t has to work too, so no time off for him either. That keeps him off the "campaign trail", and in the ring. Also, I wanted Swift to show up tonight. I don't know if he's here or not, but if he is, then I want to be here. It's as simple as that.

Ted Pettentool: That's great....all of it....my neck hurts. So Mav, it's a shame you're not in the E1, but who do you think is going to win the whole thing?

Mav Valentine: It's hard to say. I know Trevor wants to become "Mr. E1", but I'd want to give it to Bashin Dan if he's got his head in the game. You can't really count out Amigo either. Mike's....hehe....got other things on his mind, so I don't know. We'll see it play out.

Ted Pettentool: Surprised you didn't figure Tack Angel, the STAR PRINCE, into the equation. It's well known that of all of his massive accomplishments, winning the THE tournament hasn't been one of them.

Mav Valentine: Just like all these others guys, he'd be a potential winner if his head was in the game. I don't know if if it is.

Ted Pettentool: What makes you say that?

Elsewhere Backstage

Tack was whistling and strutting around backstage, happy as can be. He started singing to the tune of "Mambo #5".

Tack Angel: ♫ One, two, three, four, six, everybody in the castle let's go have sex. In the hotel round the corner. Girls want to do the Star Prince, but I really don't wanna. Get caught without my wives, or else I'd lose one of my nine lives. I got Amy, Makoto, Faris, Tracy, Iroha, and Nani, and maybe two more if I'm feeling frisky! I want to try a new piece of pork, a girl with big boobs that I'd like to bork. If she's stacked, I will try to jump her and then I will pump her. A little bit of Amy oh you know. A little big of Faris yo ho ho ho. A little bit Tracy oh yes please. A little bit of Nani, I'm on my kne- ♫

Suddenly, Cadmus came around the corner and kicked Tack Angel as hard as he could in the groin.

Tack Angel: !!!

Cadmus: Haha! It seems we have found the weakness of the Star Prince! Attack him at the source of his power, and he can not propagate his genes any further and-

Tack started to foam at the mouth, as he stared wide eyed up at the ceiling.Cadmus: Huh...odd reaction. 

Tack began to black out, but suddenly found himself floating into a weird and colorful space. Vaporwave music played as he floated down a grid like hallway, with different objects floating past him. A bright white light at the end beckoned him, as pink, purple, and blue colorful imagery zoomed by him. He saw the ghostly imagery of his wives come into focus. They all joined hands and flew together towards the bright light.

Back in reality, Tack was convulsing and foaming at the mouth.

Cadmus: ...I'm....I'm going to go. This is freaking me out a little.




Tommy Dukes: Tommy Dukes here! The white bald guy in Edo of Wrestling! We're here in Edo! This place is PACKED! We're in the legendary Kora Hall in Kyoto Edo, for the first night of the E1 Climax Sengoku War! Tonight, we'll see the best of the best, fighting it out to win THE E1 Climax! The biggest Tournament in ALL of sports! College tournaments? Take a hike! Superb Owl? Go away! Supermarket Sweep Tournament of Champions? Y-you stick around. You're great.

Nerma: Tommy, that's not all we're getting tonight is it?

Tommy Dukes: No mam, and once again I would like to apologize for oogling that woman when you were not around. I was just-

Nerma: It's fine Tommy! It's fine! Drop it! I just wanted to leverage that to get a commitment from you that we're trying for a baby!

Tommy Dukes: You're so manipulative, and I love that about you for some reason. Why is that?

Nerma: This whole promotion is filled with subs and doms. Literally everyone.

Larry Grim: Well, I already know who wins this, so I'm just going to sit here politely.

Makoto Angel: ....Is it Tack? Will you tell me? I'll bake you cake.

Larry Grim: I don't eat.

Makoto Angel: Oh right. Wait, you don't have a tongue. How do you talk?

Larry Grim: ....

Tommy Dukes: For those watching on Shogun! TV, we're happy to be back, and hopefully, you don't have to watch us burn down your country again, unless it's good for ratings, and then maybe. Who knows? It's the E1 Climax! Let's do it to it, and-

Tommy, Nerma, Larry, and Makoto: TAKE IT TO THE RING!

EBW: Xcite "E1 Climax Sengoku War"
Kora Hall, Kyoto, Edo
ENN/Shogun! TV

1. 6-Man Tag: w00t/Cadmus[o]/Bobby Blitzworth beat Mav Valentine/Jammer/Benjamin[x] via Dark Star Cutter -> Pin
-Opening match saw rivalries collide, as Triple Crown World Champion Mav Valentine teamed with Jammer and Benjamin of Dan Club, to face w00t, NEW Television Champion Cadmus, and the returning Bobby Blitzworth, with Arliss Michaels in his corner. Bobby and Jammer had to call their game of Horse a draw, and decided to settle it in the ring. However, the finish came not from them, but from Cadmus, who continues his winning ways. He jabbed Benji with a thumb to the eye before hitting a w00t approved Dark Star Cutter to get the pin. After the match, the Starlight Knight ran down to the ring to mix it up with Cadmus, while Jammer and Blitzworth fought into the crowd. Arliss tried to sell t-shirts to the Edo crowd. w00t and Mav stared off in the ring when suddenly, Swift's theme began to play.

Tommy Dukes: Here he comes! The man, the myth, the legend, the BEAST! Brawler Swift! He's rubbing his forehead against the ropes. Look at him as he paces between w00t and Mav. He's sizing them up.

Swift: w00t, you can get the hell out of here. I'll deal with you later. We're got shit to settle, but right now, I have business with the "champ".

w00t: This isn't over for either of you.

Swift: It is tonight. Get the hell out of here!

w00t: ....

Swift: So, Mav Valentine....the little gopher all grown up huh?

Mav Valentine: I paid my dues. I'm no gopher.

Swift: No, I guess you're not huh. After all, I came all the way to Edo to answer the challenge. You want the best. You want to beat the other man who beat the Bad Dudes? You want to beat the man who is the undisputed Champion of Champions with my 4-Crown accolades?

Mav Valentine: Absolutely.

Swift: Heh, you've got balls. You're crazy brave kid. You better make sure you want this, because it's going to be bloody. It's going to be brutal. It's going to be heavy metal carnage with a BEAST! THE Brawler Swift! Are you SURE, that you want this?

Mav Valentine: Sounds like a blast. Bring it on.

Swift: You ARE crazy. Good. Good. I'll be seeing you at the end of the road kid. Excuse me....champ.

2. EBW Challenge Championship x E1 Climax Block B: Cade[2] beat Dirk Laramie[0] via Cadebreaker -> Pin -> Title Defense!
-Hot opener to the tournament, that saw Dirk was more than just a mustache and a panel van. His recent videos had made him something of a beloved meme in Edo, giving him that Magnum PT rub over here. However, his first match in the E1 would end with a Cadebreaker from the Challenge Champion, who both won the match to earn points, AND defend his Championship.

Nerma: Cade with a big win here. He just keeps showing what he can do. That younger generation could surprise us in this E1 Climax. Bashin Dan was watching the match. You know he's ready for his shot. When they have their match is Dan going to be able to convince Cade to put the Challenge Championship on the line?

3. E1 Climax Block A: Hotlanta[2] beat Generator[0] via 2x Powerbomb -> Pin
-Old rivals clashed with a mix of styles. Generator had the support of the crowd, who seem to back The Legion, but the appearance of Dogma Mask, and the men in suits lead to a distraction Gen could not recover from. Hotlanta hit the 2x Powerbomb for the pin and the 2 points.

Tommy Dukes: Hotlanta with a win there, but the Legion seem more interested in what Dogma Mask is doing. Those guys in the masks attacked Javier Leos and Frey Tiburon, but also seem to have beef with the Legion, and the Lucha Bastards for that matter. They are picking a big fight here.

Backstage

Ted Pettentool: Wow, it's been great so far tonight right? I'm not joined by the opponents for the next match. Trevor Mach the "Bad Man", and Grind. You guys have history right?

Trevor Mach: That we do. Grind has been a real Bad Dude through good times and bad.

Grind: Trevor also slept with my girlfriend.

Trevor Mach: ....She was evil, and you guys had broken up! Again though, she was EVIL!

Grind: ...I'm just kidding man. We're both beyond that. I'm trying to spread a message of positivity. That doesn't mean I'm holding back in the ring though.

Trevor Mach: Good. I wouldn't want you to. Another thing, if Dogma, and those masked dick heads try to get involved, we're BOTH going to kick some ass. Don't think I forgot what you did at Church. I was there too, and it's personal baby.

Grind: Glad we're on the same page. See you out there.

4. E1 Climax Block B: Trevor Mach[2] beat Grind[0] via Knee Trigger x Kimura -> Submission
-Awesome match up between Mach and Grind, with another fun clash of styles. Mach tried keep Grind in the corner, using knee strikes and elbows, but when Grind got loose, he had the speed and agility on his side. Finish came when Mach put his knees up to block the Rolling SSP. He came off the ropes hard with a Knee Trigger that sent him to the mat with Grind. Grind was ready to surprisingly kick out of the pin, so Mach transitioned to a Kimura lock, and forced Grind to submit for the 2 points.

Larry Grim: Mach with the win. A combination of brawling, and a slight nod to his Bushido style. Edo eats that up, and we all know that Trevor is the biggest fan of Edo's 2000's MMA wrestling hybrid. Still, a good match, and Trevor is helping up Grind and giving him that fist bump. Dogma and the masked men did in fact appear again, oh wait, not yet.....alright there they are. Mach and Grind are going after them. Here comes security to keep them separated.

5. E1 Climax Block A: Tack Angel[2] beat Maurice[0[ via Clutch Winged Angel -> Pin
-A limping Tack Angel took on Maurice in what could best be described as a kick boxing match. Heavy shots with no take down attempts to speak of, and one of the faster matches to end, as Maurice nearly low blowed Tack, which put him in a defensive mindset, and suddenly he pulled Maurice in to avoid further kicks. He lifted him for the Clutch Winged Angel, and pinned him for the points.

Makoto Angel: That's my Tacky Star Boy! 2 Points! Yeah! I hope he wins this year.  I know that's biased, but he considers never winning this a curse that he wants to break.

Nerma: Better than breaking his ball right?

Makoto Angel: Don't say such things!

Nerma: ...Sorry?

6. E1 Climax Block B: Amigo[2] beat Bashin Dan[0] via Dead Lift Hagen Suplex x Ankle Lock -> Referee Stoppage
-A highly anticipated match saw Amigo taking on the Dangerous Player Bashin Dan, who has a sizeable following in Edo. A pattern emerged about that though, as the Edo favorite found themselves on the ropes, with Dan not showing the heart and fire needed to face Amigo. The amaresu expert escaped a Brave Clash attempt and hit a Dead Lift Hagen Suplex. He followed it up with an Ankle Lock, and even though Dan wasn't firing on all cylinders, he still refused to tap. A Referee Stoppage ended the match, giving Amigo the 2 points.

Tommy Dukes: Dan wasn't in it this time around. He emotions weigh heavily on his performance, and I think the condition of Hope Mach is weighing on him more than ever. He's going to need to step up for the rest of the tournament.

7. E1 Climax Block A: Firebrand X[2] beat Kinniku Mike[0] via Crash Thunder Buster -> Pin
-The final block match of the night saw Firebrand X take on a visibly disturbed Kinniku Mike. As always, the two lit up the crowd with the action, but the comedy of Mike trying to cope with his new situation was also on display. Brand lifted Mike for the Crash Thunder Buster to keep the big man down for the 1-2-3.

Tommy Dukes: And that's 2 points for Firebrand X. Mike like Dan, is going to have to tune out the outside distractions to win this tournament. This is the E1 guys! You've got to bring your BEST!

8. EBW Women's Interim Television Championship: Duvalie(c) beat Kimber Blaze via Backstabber x Rear Naked Choke -> Referee Stoppage -> Title Defense!
-Main event saw M's next pick Kimber Blaze take on Duvalie for the Interim Television Championship. Eagleland Muscle really brought it to Duvalie, who continues to have a hard time with the big powerful women on the roster. She was even hoisted up for the Eagleland Rack, but the sneaky maid escaped and hit the Backstabber. She pulled out the concealed cord and choked out Kimber for the stoppage win and title defense.

Nerma: Not the way we wanted to see the show end, with Duvalie getting yet another win with her sneaky choke. Tess and the Eisenritter have come out to celebrate, but Lady M's is standing on the stage with Gold and the James Sisters. I think Gold is M's pick to take on Duvalie next. She's not going to let up until she gets answers about what happened to Hope. We'll see you on Xperience, as the E1 Climax continues!

Last edited by Machismo (8/06/2020 2:15 am)