Ted Pettentool: Happy New Year!!! Ted Pettentool, leading you into 2026, with a brand spanking new EBW World! 

Stephy Wyland: And I'm here too! 

Ted Pettentool: Yep...you sure are. 

Stephy Wyland: What's wrong? Don't tell me you're sick of your co-host already?

Ted Pettentool: Alison said that if I stand too close to you, she's going to bite your tongue off and eat it. 

Stephy Wyland: Hahaha! She's so jealous! It's cute! She's got nothing to worry abo-

Ted Pettentool: Listen to me. You need to take her VERY seriously. She's not joking. She WILL bite your tongue off and eat it. How do I know? I used to be uncircumsized. 

Stephy Wyland: AH! HOLY SH- This isn't how we should be kicking off 2026! 

Ted Pettentool: I agree 100%! Let's move on, with you standing a little further away. Much better! So EBW is going to hit the ground running, not just with Xcite and Havok, but also with TUE, and the brand new Wrestle Bowl system! What IS the Wrestle Bowl system? I'm still waiting for Producer Steve to hand me that memo, but let's look into Xcite and Havok!

EBW: Xcite "New Game+ 2026"
Iwata Memorial Gymnasium, Onett
ENN

1. Eagleland Championships #1 Contender: Benjamin vs. Colby Roads vs. CP Munk 
2. EBW Women's Championship Contender Tournament: Astrid Rúnsdóttir vs. Erica 
3. EBW Tag Team Championship Ladder: Seto Kaiba/Johnny Starbound vs. Grind/Java Coffington vs. Curry Man<3'dPW>/Jerk Taco Man vs. Snakebite/Troy vs. Matt/Tai vs. Maseo Kurenai/Keisuke Nago
4. EBW Women's Championship Contender Tournament: Cheerleader Jenny vs. Usagi Tsukino
5. EBW Eagleland Championship: Tack Angel(c) vs. ?

Stephy Wyland: Wow! We have a lot of title implications on that first show of the year! 

Ted Pettentool: Xcite is setting the pace with a loaded show. Tack Angel will defend the Eagleland strappage against either Benjamin, Colby Roads, or CP Munk. We have the ladies starting a tournament to crown a new EBW Women's Champion after Hope Mach became the EBW Super Women's Champion at Last Clash 2025. Hey, that means she could actually show up to watch this! We know Tracy isn't happy, and we're all waiting to see how she responds to what happened. We also have chaos incarnate as the tag teams of Xcite will engage in a Ladder Match to capture the vacant EBW Tag Team Championships. It's going to be big, it's going to be out of control, it's going to be XCITE!

EBW: Havok "New Game+ 2026"
Renegade Arena, Saturn City
ENT

1. Women's World Eliminator: Heather Mach vs. Darkness Aoi
2. World Tag Team Championship Eliminator: Boomtown/? vs. Subculture/Picky Minch
3. World Tag Team Championship Eliminator: Derek Mach/Dougie Mach vs. Degrees/Jackson Kain  
4. Women's World Eliminator: Val Dorado vs. Wendy Mustang
5. World Tag Team Championship Decision: ? vs. ?
6. Women's World Championship Decision: ? vs. ? 

Stephy Wyland: Havok has a lot of title implications as well! We're really setting the board for the new year! We're going to crown new World Tag Team Champions AND a new Women's World Champion! 

Ted Pettentool: That's right, and everyone is very curious who Boomtown has brought in to be his mystery tag partner! That's a huge question swirling around with the fellow influencers!



Drip Casual: *nasally and monotone* Chat, I don't normally produce my own content, I just let other people do it for me, and then I comment over it and you guys make me a millionaire, but I have a fellow influencer with me today in Boomtown. 

Boomtown: Bringing the boom baby! 

Drip Casual: *nasally and monotone* Right. Exciting stuff...or maybe it isn't. I really don't have strong feelings one way or the other on any particular thing to maximize my reach and profits. 

Boomtown: Yeah, that sounds like you. 

Drip Casual: *nasally and monotone* So chat is asking me to ask you about your tag partner for your next wrestling show? I don't know, chat. Should I really ask him? I don't have enough subs to feel inclined to-

Boomtown: You know what your problem is? You sit here, while the world goes on around you. You just comment on it. I'm living it. I'm doing it! I'm driving a tank into the center of Saturn City, and I'm hosting New Year's Eve events! I'm bringing the REAL INFLUENCE! You're just using words...monotone words...and you don't have feelings or passion for anything! I want more than that! I want more than you could possibly imagine. You want to know who my partner is? It's someone who shares that hunger, and that's all I'm gonna say! 

Drip Casual: *nasally and monotone* Chat, should I be offended by what he just said or should we watch some epic fail videos?

-

Ted Pettentool: Somehow...that guy is one of the most viewed personalities on the internet. And people say EBW is crazy, I'm starting to think it's everyone else. "Oh, you're just too old and you don't understand, Ted." Oh yeah? Laying in a bed of nails hurts, and if I grow older it will still hurt. The next generation can't make it not hurt. You get what I'm saying? Mediocre is mediocre no matter the current year...which is currenly 2026. Wow. EBW began in 2006. Specifically it kicked off in March of 2006, and Ness was there, and he remembers. He wants to bring back that vibe this year in TUE, and he's gonna do that by taking TUE on the road and to the streets, retracing the steps that brought them to the dance. TUE: Beware the Gusty Bat 2026 will take place in the streets of Onett with a big card!

TUE "Beware the Gutsy Bat 2026" 
Onett Streets, Onett
EBS

1. Singles: Tony Wonder vs. El Mago
2. Women's Tag: The Final Girl/Paula vs. Moira Lees/?
3. Singles: Rains vs. Daimon Kuro 
4. Tag: Shark #1/Shark #2 vs. Arsene St. Marvelous/Lux Amore 
5. Non-Title Singles: Marco De Leon vs. Ness 

Stephy Wyland: That IS big. I mean in terms of length. They don't normally have that many! 

Some of these matches are call backs of sorts, with the Sharks in the semi-main like they were at the first event, AND, Ness taking on an opponent in the main event, who just so happens to be the TUE Champion, but the title is not on the line. Rains will be getting another shot at that after his DQ victory at Last Clash. I'm told Tony Wonder was set free by El Mago for this big encounter!

Onett Drug Store

Tony Wonder was shaking, with jittery hands as he popped open the aspirin bottle. He was startled and spilled them all on the floor as Abra Mago appeared behind him in a poof of smoke. 

Tony Wonder: AH! 

Abra Mago: Tony! I'm so sorry! Are you alright? 

Tony Wonder: I'm trying to be! I really am! I have to take on your brother! If I lose, he's going to deal with me again! I probably deserve it! 

Abra Mago: I told him to stop sending you to the Shadow Realm! 

Tony Wonder: Oh he did. He sent me to the a liminal backroom instead...it's worse...it's so much worse. I deserve it though. 

Abra Mago: You keep saying that! Why? 

Tony Wonder: El Mago is a true magician, and I'm just-

Abra Mago: You're the BEST! 

Tony Wonder: Huh? 

Abra Mago: I love your tricks! 

Tony Wonder: I just know cheap party tricks. I think it insults your brother who has LITERAL mysterious powers! Have you SEEN what he's put me through?! 

Abra Mago: I'm sorry, Tony. You've been through a lot. More than anyone should have to endure. My brother takes this stuff so seriously, but he's lost the point. Magic tricks are meant to make people smile. You make me smile. You bring smiles to children all over. I'm also sorry if you don't want to be stuck with me. I asked El Mago to pair us up, not realizing he was going to be so brutal about it. I just wanted to learn tricks from you! 

Tony Wonder: ...You literally appeared behind me in a cloud of smoke. 

Abra Mago: Poof powers aren't that unique. A few people in EBW can do it. I know for a fact Trevor Mach can do it. You know what no one else can do? The kind of tricks YOU DO. Tony, I think you're the best! 

Tony Wonder: Oh...oh. OH!

Tony looked around and panicked. 

Abra Mago: What's wrong? 

Tony Wonder: I was happy for a moment! Normally something bad happens when I'm happy. 

Abra Mago: Tony, look at me. You need to put the fear behind you, embrace who you are, and bring the fight to my brother. Show him you are worthy to finally be the best that you can be, and don't let Tack Angel's comments keep you trapped in a torture dimension any longer. 

Tony Wonder: You're right! You're absolutely right! I need to trust myself! I need to step up! I need to be...TONY WONDER! WAAAAAH! Wait, Tack did what?

-

Ted Pettentool: So we can already tell you about two HUGE bouts that are going to be taking place at New Year Rising 2026, which will take place like at the Twoson Fairgrounds, like it always does. Zyro Kurogane will be defending the World Championship against new pillar and his Samurai Ifrit friend and former tag champion partner, Dragon Shiryu. Jammer will then be defending the EBW Championship against the vicous, violent, and blood thirsty Luca Blight. Luca is finally making his move on the title, probably after getting a nudge in that direction by his mysterious sponsors.

EBW: New Year Rising 2026
Twoson Fairgrounds, Twoson
ENN+/ENT+

1. Havok - World Championship: Zyro Kurogane(c) vs. Dragon Shiryu
2. Xcite - EBW Championship: Jammer(c) vs. Luca Blight 


Stephy Wyland: So what is this news about a Wrestle Bowl?

Ted Pettentool: Yes! We have big sponsors wanting to host special events this year, and the first one is going to be called the Geist Bowl, taking place in Hanta City! More details to come!

The Gamer Girlz Room

Alison Chains mindlessly watched a screen saved bouncing around the screen, waiting for it to hit the corner, while consuming definitely illegal substances. Christy Angel paced behind her, as she deleted several texts, and closed down her OnlyMarks account. Lindy Moseby watched her with curiosity.

Christy Angel: There! I did it! It's done! My past is erased, cause luckily, the internet isn't for ever. 

Lindy Moseby: Actually, it is. All those pictures are on Goonerbait.com. 

Christy Angel: WHAT?! How do you know that?

Lindy Moseby: I don't know. I don't go there. I don't know. 

Christy Angel: HECK AND A HALF! I realized that if I'm going to start making some serious moves with Cade, I need to get my act together! I even took a shower and shaved my armpits today! 

Lindy Moseby: Wow. 

Alison Chains: I miss that baked in Christy musk.

Christy Angel: Gross! It wasn't THAT bad! 

Lindy Moseby: It was kind of bad.

Christy Angel: ...Dang. Well 2025 was alive, but in 2026 I finally have sex. 

Lindy Moseby: That kind of rhymed. 

Christy Angel: I'm serious. I've been working on self-improvement. *inner voice* Because who I am is simply not enough. 

Lindy Moseby: That's great, I guess. 

Christy Angel: I've already started reading this self help book! *inner voice* I must optimize. I must compete! 

Lindy Moseby: That's an achievement already. 

Christy Angel: I'm going to use every spare moment to get better. *inner voice* I can't be average. 

Lindy Moseby: Sounds exhausting. 

Christy Angel: I'm jounaling, I'm praying, I'm getting my steps in. *inner voice* This solves EVERYTHING. 

Lindy Moseby: Journaling huh? 

Christy Angel: And eight hours of sleep is essential. *inner voice* It's a brief reprieve from this self induced torture. Move piggy! You're not asleep yet! 

Alison Chains: I found her journal. 

Christy Angel: What?! 

Alison Chains: It's just bad written fan fiction about how badly you want Cade make you choke with his d-

Christy Angel: STOP READING THAT IMMEDIATELY!

Christy knocked the journal out of her hands, and it flew to Lindy's hands. She stumbled with it as well, and it flew into the air again, landing right into Cade's hands. 

Cade Yaggis: Always something going on when I come in here. 

Christy Angel: CADE! 

Cade Yaggis: What's this book? 

Christy Angel: DON'T LOOK! 

Cade Yaggis: I'm doing WHAT?! 

Christy Angel: DON'T LOOK! 

Cade Yaggis: Christy...better keep this from your Dad. Here. 

Christy Angel: Thank you! I appreciate you not turning the page. You'll probably appreciate that you didn't as well. 

Cade Yaggis: You're always so goofy. That's why I like you! 

Christy Angel: Yeah....goofy....haha! So like did you maybe want to go into the broom closet and fingerbang me? 

Cade Yaggis: What? 

Christy Angel: Did I say that out loud?! I was wondering if you wanted to go get something to eat. 

Cade Yaggis: You mean another date? 

Christy Angel: Yes. 

Cade Yaggis: Heh. Christy, you always look so nervous. We've hung out together plenty! Relax. I'd love to go. 

Christy Angel: Outstanding! 

Alison Chains: Be careful, Cade! Steer clear of broom closets! 

Christy Angel: SHUT UP! 

The Angel Residence

Tack Angel was halfway through his third white claw when he realized the Mega Dudes reunion tour posters still hung crooked on the wall, mocking him. The silence of the empty arena—no pyro, no screaming fans, just the hum of the fridge, felt heavier than a steel chair to the skull. He scratched at his beard, rough from neglect, and glared at the calendar where someone (probably Subculture, that little shit) had circled his daughter’s due date in red. Christy’s latest text, asking him how to remove texts before Cade could see them, haunted him. 

Then the bedroom door creaked open, and Tack nearly choked on his drink. Makoto stood there, but not *his* Makoto—not the tomboy in a fuku who could suplex a man twice her size. This version was all black lace and smudged eyeliner, her usual golden hair dyed ink-dark, lips stained like bruised fruit. She leaned against the doorframe, one hand on her hip, the other toying with the choker around her throat. 

Makoto Angel: Surprise!

Tack’s grip on the white claw went slack.  

His brain short-circuited somewhere between *Goth Makoto* and *Oh hell yes*. The way the fishnets hugged her thighs, the way the corset pushed her tits up like an offering, wait, were they *bigger*? She smirked, reading his face like an open book. 



Makoto Angel: You look like you’ve seen a ghost.

Tack’s pulse hammered in his ears. 

Tack Angel: Nah. Just the sexiest phantom I've ever been haunted by, and I've been haunted by a few. Like, if I had a nickel for every haunting, I'd have five, which doesn't seem like a lot, but we're talking about hauntings!

She closed the distance in two strides, her knee pressing into the couch between his legs. The scent of her, something sharp, like danger—flooded his senses. 

Makoto Angel: 2025 had its ups and downs. Let’s have our own ups and downs right now.

Tack didn’t need telling twice. His hands found her chest, and locked right in. 

Tack Angel: Oh yes, let's.

Last edited by Machismo (1/02/2026 2:13 am)

Boss M's Office

Boss M's was shown with Geist Corporation CEO Blake Faust to open the show. 

Boss M's: Welcome to a new year, Xciters! Ick, this fake enthusiasm is killing me. Look, it's going to be a great year, but my assistant Lucca is missing her nice purple hair, one of my kids is sick, the other one had to get a lego removed from his nose, and no it wasn't Trevor, it was one of the kids, BUT, Trevor isn't feeling so great himself. It's one of those starts to the year. The crazy bastard made a song for spotify too...I'm sure you've heard it! I love the man, but I never quite know what he's going to do next. Just when you think he's predictable. Oh, and another thing, there is NOTHING wrong with building Gundam models, and I don't care what state of dress I'm in, because I'm supposed to be alone and-

Blake Faust: *cough* 

Boss M's: Yeah yeah! I see you billionaire philanthropist! We're kicking off the year in a big way for EBW, with a Geist Corporation themed "Bowl Game" known as the Geist Bowl. Why? Cause Geist is the sponsor, obviously. Try to keep up. 

Blake Faust: Thanks Tali. The Geist Bowl will be the first bowl game of the year, in this new concept that is bringing back the team sports concept that was so successful with the Team Championship Rings. This won't be for those though, but instead a "National Championship" for the winners. The first National Champions will be decided at the Geist Bowl, and it doesn't exactly HAVE to be Xcite versus Havok going forward, but that's exactly what it will be in our opening game of the season. Next week on Xcite, a new of Xciters will be formed to take on a team of Renegades. This will evolve to include more "expansion teams" as the year plays out. The fusion of wrestling and football that other companies have been DESPERATE to do! I applaud my partners in EBW for taking the risk. 

Boss M's: Risk? Have you been paying attention. This company is insane! 

Blake Faust: Why do you think I'm a sponsor! *wink*




Larry Grim: Welcome to a new year! Welcome to Xcite! We're here in Onett, where it all began. I'm Larry Grim, joined as always by Apple Kid. How was your New Year's Eve, Apple?

Apple Kid: I got pound mochi with Minako! How do you think it was? It was awesome! 

Larry Grim: That's nice. No shenanigans or pratfalls? 

Apple Kid: Nope! 

Larry Grim: Ah, a hopeful sign for 2026! 

Apple Kid: Well, except for Minako missing the mallet once and breaking my hand.

Larry Grim: WHOA! THAT'S REALLY SWOLLEN! 

Apple Kid: Broken in SEVERAL places! She kissed it though, so I'm good. 

Larry Grim: A kiss helped? Sometimes EBW can be so wholesome and other times it's like I'm watching porn or a snuff film. What genre even are we anymore? 

Apple Kid: We're....FUN! 

Larry Grim: Right you are, Apple, and we're going to have some fun tonight! We're going to begin a tournament to crown a new EBW Women's Champion. We're going to see an Eagleland Championship bout, and we're going to have a MASSIVE tag team ladder match to see if Snakebite and Troy can hang onto those EBW Tag Team Championships. 

Apple Kid: That's going to be a crazy match, and now I know another reason Geist CEO Blake Faust is here, because one of his other investments is in the match! 

Larry Grim: That's right! The Super CXJ Tag Team is formed! Java Coffington and Grind have agreed to join forces after an amazing match at Last Clash! They are going by the name...



Larry Grim: Rise and Grind! 

Apple Kid: I love it!

Larry Grim: That's not the only team we're excited to see in this. I mean obviously we have the champs, but this is very CXJ heavy, so we're going to see some serious action here. One of the teams is Maseo Kurenai and newcomer Keisuke Nago!

Backstage

Maseo Kurenai was listening to music as he saw Keisuke Nago huddled in front of a computer screen. 

Maseo Kurenai: Well if it isn't my new partner! Keisuke Nago! You're here because Papa, aren't you? 

Keisuke Nago: One of my motives, sure. Maseo, your father and I were allies in Anahauc and Edo, when dealing with the group known as Fangire. They tried to make him one of them. They tried to make him a King. He rejected it then, but I fear he's taken to it now. What do you know about him? I mean recently. 

Maseo Kurenai: Trust me, I remember all of this. You helped me with Neo-Fangire....you and Papa. I don't know what's gotten into him recently, but he spent a lot of time away from home. You might be onto something. Someone may have convinced him to take that crown, but why is he back here?

Keisuke Nago: Unfinished business? 

Maseo Kurenai: I was hoping to come here for a fresh start. Did we fail?

Kaisuke Nago: We didn't fail.

-

Larry Grim: Obviously a complicated story and history between them and the returning Kiva. Should be great to see them in action together tonight, but first we have a #1 Contender to declare! Colby Roads...he fell off in the tail end of 2025. Luca Blight raided his Dark Story faction, and left him in shambles, but now he's trying to pick up the pieces, but so is CP Munk! They tend to work together, but both of them want this chance at Tack. You know who else is looking to reinvigorate their career? The "Mystic Bout Machine" Benjamin!

Backstage

Benjamin was making his way to the ring, when he was stopped by Officer Lainey Strong. 

Officer Lainey Strong: Benji! Benji, you need to be careful! 

Benjamin: My love. What dismays you? You seem crestfallen. 

Officer Lainey Strong: Dismays? Crestfallen? I swear. Benji, you saw what happened at Last Clash. Dan got beaten like I've never seen him beaten before. Luca wanted to dismantle him, and now he's hunting for Jammer, and YOU are right in the middle. You have a target on your back. 

Benjamin: You think so? 

Officer Lainey Strong: Trust the instincts. I'm a cop, remember? 

Benjamin: Dan was looking for a challenge, and my dear friend found it. He'll be back. As for me, if Blight wants a fight, I won't underestimate him, and neither will Jammer. Dan Club has faced many challenges over the years. We're not going to crumble to Luca Blight. 

Officer Lainey Strong: ...I hope you're right...I really do.

EBW: Xcite "New Game+ 2026"
Iwata Memorial Gymnasium, Onett
ENN

1. Eagleland Championships #1 Contender: Benjamin vs. Colby Roads vs. CP Munk 
-The night kicked off hot with three very different styles colliding. The opening bell barely finished ringing before chaos took hold. Colby Roads immediately tried to turn the match into a sprint, darting between opponents and firing off quick strikes to keep Benjamin from setting his base. CP Munk leaned into unpredictability, cheap shots and reckless offense designed to frustrate rather than overpower.

Benjamin weathered it all.

After being knocked outside early, Benjamin regrouped, catching Roads mid-flight with a crushing forearm that echoed through the gym. CP Munk attempted to capitalize, targeting Benjamin’s knee and jaw, but every gambit only slowed the inevitable. The turning point came when Roads and Munk briefly aligned to neutralize Benjamin, only for their alliance to collapse the moment an opening appeared.

Benjamin exploded back into the match, flattening Roads with a lariat and cutting CP Munk off with a devastating Spear that folded him in half.
Winner: Benjamin via Spear to CP Munk -> Pin 

Larry Grim: Benji with the win! 

Apple Kid: Colby and CP Munk are going at it, shouting each other down in the ring! They both wanted that shot, and were not willing to work together, and Benjamin used that to his advantage. 

Larry Grim: Benjamin will go to take on Tack Angel in the main event. I wonder how he feels about that. We're gonna out right now!

-

Tack Angel: Well well well! Benjamin, the "Mystic Bout Machine" is coming for the Star Spangled Prince. He's coming for the Eagleland Championship. Bring it on, Benji! Ya know, we had an amazing series of matches a few years back, when I was the 5-Crown King! I got to admit, my memory of that time is very hazy, so I'd love nothing more, than a chance to have a show stealing TONIGHT! All of Eagleland is watching, and the Star Spangled Prince won't let you down! I will give you a match worthy of your time and money! I'm feeling great in 2026! My wife is goth now, so that's pretty much set everything into place! YEAH!

-

Larry Grim: Well, Tack seems happy. A goth wife, eh?

Apple Kid: She looks GREAT. 

Larry Grim: The women of EBW ALL look great...in the ring that is. I can't judge looks. I'm a skeleton man. The Neon Valkyrie is taking on the legend known as Erica up next, in the first steps towards an EBW Women's Championship shot. Will she bring the title to Neon Valhalla?

2. EBW Women's Championship Contender Tournament: Astrid Rúnsdóttir vs. Erica 
-This match began as a technical contest but quickly became a test of restraint. Astrid used her strength and balance to control the early exchanges, repeatedly grounding Erica and forcing her to fight from underneath. Erica responded with speed and desperation, slipping holds and attacking Astrid’s arm whenever possible.

As the pressure mounted, Erica’s tactics grew increasingly questionable as they always do with her. Closed-fist shots, hair pulls, and blatant rope abuse. Queen Beryl and the Dark Starlights came out, which seemed to aggrivate Erica. She tried to put Astrid away with the Air Raid Crash, but she escaped and hit the Ragnarok Driver. As she looked to score an upset, Queen Beryl and the Dark Starlights rolled into the ring to attack. Astrid got the DQ win. 
Winner: Astrid Rúnsdóttir via DQ 

Larry Grim: What's going on here? Beryl and the Dark Starlights just intervened, and Erica doesn't look happy about it! Here comes Mamoru Chiba to break them up! 

Erica: Get off me, Mamoru! I'm sick of this shit! You have any idea who I am or what I've been through to get where I am! I was the most successful EBW Women's Champion of all time! I'm not a stooge! I've been to the top of the bottom many many times! I've let a sick Auditor and his goons carve into my flesh to remind me what pain felt like, because I'd felt it to many times fighting! I've been fighting my WHOLE LIFE! I'm not a stooge! I don't need help to win! Get off of me! From now on, you all stay out of my way! 

Apple Kid: Whoa! Erica is showing some fire here. I think the recent back and forth matches with Makoto might have sparked something in her, and this match just lit the fuse. 

Larry Grim: That leaves that dastardly and predatory Mamoru Chiba stuck between a rock and a hard place! 

Apple Kid: I guess so! Erica is one of those women who has been here for the long haul! Trust me, I was there! 

Larry Grim: She sees herself as a Queen, so she probably doesn't like the thought of serving under one.

Locker Room

A coughing and wheezing Trevor Mach decided that a hot shower might help him out as he fought a seasonal cough. As he tried to swat away the Lakitu following him, the shot cut to another Lakitu in the shower that was able to see another person lurking in the steam. 

?: Trevor?

Trevor Mach: What?! *cough cough* Tracy?! You need to get out of here! 

Tracy: I was waiting for you. 

Trevor Mach: How did you know I would even be in here?

Tracy: I know you. I know what you do. You love a good scalding shower, cause you can only set aside your germaphobia for so long. Once the adrenaline wears off. 

Trevor Mach: You know too much about me. This needs to stop. PLEASE put a towel on! 

Tracy: She took it from me. She took my title. She took my trophy. She took my purpose. 

Trevor Mach: You got worked, that's for sure, but the match was legit. You just didn't realize the gamble. You want to talk about taking things? *cough cough* You took Tali's ability to walk. A few years ago, in this position I would have strangled the life out of you. Rejection is a mercy. You need to leave. 

Tracy: Look at me! I can do so much more than she can! 

Trevor Mach: ...You'd be surprised. No Tracy. No.

Tracy: Every Mach wants to see my failure! You'll come to see that I'm right! It's only a matter of time! You can tell Tali that I still have a trophy that she can't touch! It's out of her reach! It's mine and it will always be mine!

Tracy stormed out of the showers into the hallway, seemingly forgetting that she was completely naked. She walked by a stunned Tack and Makoto Angel on her to the dressing room. 

Makoto Angel: ...Wasn't Trevor going to take a shower? 

Tack Angel: ...She certainly gets around. 

Makoto Angel: Nakedly too! Is she prettier than me? 

Tack Angel: What?! No way! I don't think about her at all anymore. You know, I don't even remember marrying her! 

Makoto Angel: Oh that's sweet to say, but it's hard to forget days like that. 

Tack Angel: No, I'm serious! I have this huge blank space in my life I try not to dwell on!

Makoto Angel: Really? 

Tack Angel: I get these flashes. I feel like I was this really bad guy? I remember being surrounded by women. I remember a crystal palace. I remember Trevor driving up in a fiery blaze and attacking me with a scythe. I think I've been hit in the head too many times. 

Makoto Angel: Maybe let Degrees check you out.

Tracy stormed back up, this time with clothes on. 

Tracy: Are you mocking me, Tack?

Tack Angel: What?! 

Tracy: I hear you! You pretending you don't remember our marriage! I spent all that time boosting you up, and helping you become the 5-Crown King! That was because of ME! Don't EVER forget that! Just as easily as I can make you, I can break you. Don't forget that you're not a Super Champion anymore, thanks to ME! 

Tack Angel: How could I forget that? 

Makoto Angel: You need to leave him alone, Tracy. 

Tracy: The inferior bitch. You'll never match up to me. Ever. Not in any capacity! 

Makoto Angel: Certainly not in the body count department. 



-

Larry Grim: Well that's getting tense! 

Apple Kid: That's the hard part of EBW basically having some many families, couples, and former couples all working together. You're gonna get situations like that. 

Larry Grim: To be fair, most people don't walk around naked backstage since Big Chugga Chungus got fired. 

Apple Kid: That's true. 

Larry Grim: Well folks, we wanted to make the first Xcite of 2026 special, so we're bringing you a HUGE EBW Tag Team Championship Ladder Match! This is going to be fast, furious, and instense! So many teams! Can Snakebite and Troy appease their new mysterious sponsors by retaining? We're about to find out! 

3. EBW Tag Team Championship Ladder: Seto Kaiba/Johnny Starbound vs. Grind/Java Coffington vs. Curry Man<3'dPW>/Jerk Taco Man vs. Snakebite/Troy(c) vs. Matt/Tai vs. Maseo Kurenai/Keisuke Nago
-The bell rang—and the ring instantly became a war zone.

No feeling-out process. No hesitation. Ladders slid in from all sides as bodies collided in a blur of color, steel, and momentum. The defending champions Snakebite and Troy immediately tried to establish dominance, hurling ladders into the ring and daring anyone to challenge them head-on. Grind answered first, charging through a ladder shot with brute force while Java Coffington calmly repositioned steel like a chess master setting the board.

CXJ Champion Seto Kaiba and Johnny Starbound operated with cold precision, isolating opponents and eliminating threats one at a time. Kaiba cracked a ladder across Tai’s back without emotion, while Starbound sent Matt tumbling to the floor with a springboard strike. They weren’t flashy — they were efficient.

Curry Man turned the match into a spectacle, dancing his signature dance before sprinting up ladders and diving into crowds of wrestlers with reckless abandon, while Jerk Taco Man disrupted everything by simply existing in the worst possible places at the worst possible times. He brought his girlfriend to the ring that so did not want to even be there! A ladder meant for Grind clipped Curry Man mid-flight. A ladder meant for Snakebite took out Taco Man instead. Chaos bred chaos.

Meanwhile, Maseo Kurenai and Keisuke Nago showed immaculate teamwork, repeatedly cutting off climbers with synchronized strikes and precise ladder placement. For a moment, they looked like they had cracked the code, until Kiva appeared from the rafters and swung on a cable to kick over the ladder that they were both on. He screwed up the opportunity for not just his former ally, but his own son! 

The first major turning point came when Grind attempted his first climb. Snakebite met him halfway, the two trading strikes ten feet above the mat. Troy tried to tip the ladder, only for Java Coffington to calmly brace it, holding it steady while Grind fought like a man possessed. That moment told the story of the match: power and chaos supported by calm, calculated support.

Ladders began to break.

One snapped under Curry Man’s weight. Another folded when Kaiba used it like a guillotine on Johnny Starbound by accident, frustration briefly cracking Kaiba’s perfect composure. Bodies littered the floor. The crowd rose with every climb attempt, every slip, every crash.

Late in the match, the champions made their stand.

Snakebite and Troy cleared the ring, stacking ladders like barricades and daring anyone left to step forward. Grind did — eating shots from both men but refusing to go down. Java Coffington slid in behind Troy, yanking his leg out and sending him crashing face-first into steel. Snakebite turned too late.

Grind hoisted Snakebite and drove him through a ladder, splitting it cleanly in half.

With everyone else down, exhausted, or broken, Java Coffington climbed.

Hands reached. Nobody made it in time.

The titles came down.

The building erupted.
Winners: Grind/Java Coffington[o] via Title Grab -> NEW EBW Tag Team Champions! 



Larry Grim: THAT WAS INCREDIBLE! What a way to kick off the new year, with NEW EBW Tag Team Champions! Luca Blight won't be happy about that one, but we are, because Rise and Grind have captured the titles in an INSANE bout! 

Apple Kid: Clean up on aisle three! Seriously, SO MANY LADDERS!!!

Larry Grim: We're going to have to take a break while they clear the ladders and the bodies! Cue....something!

Downtown Onett

Usagi, Minako, Ami, Rei, and Seiya Kou were all bundled up as they stopped by a small temple that had been erected following the city's destruction over a decade prior. They went to give thanks and pray for good fortune, health, and success for the year ahead. 



Usagi Tsukino: I'm so grateful for the year I had, reclaiming my identity from destiny, and being successful, not because I had to be, but because I chose to be. 

Minako Aino: Hey, you have a little help from your friends! 

Rei Hino: Well, some of us helped, and the rest hindered. 

Ami Mizuno: Sorry about that. A horrid miscalculation. 

Usagi Tsukino: I'm just glad to have you all back. Destiny doesn't dictate friendship. 

Seiya Kou: If we adhered to a destiny set before us, I wouldn't even be here right now, let alone...the way I am now. 

Usagi Tsukino: And Makoto has definitely embraced her own path. So have our other friends in the Outer Senshi. We should all do the same. 

Rei Hino: Right. It's time to before something more this year. 

Ami Mizuno: I already made a decision about that. I want to achieve a dream I had before all of this. I want to become a Doctor, like my mother. Specifically a doctor for EBW. 

Rei Hino: Mother? You mean you're NOT a robot? 

Ami Mizuno: Oh come on! We did that joke a few times and now everyone believes it! I wasn't aware of Arremer X before I agreed to the bit! 

Usagi Tsukino: Hehe. 

Minako Aino: I'm thankful for my television show, which continues to air season after season under the radar. I don't know very many people who even watch it. It's like FlixNet is more interested in just HAVING content. Just having it! I'm also thankful for that Apple dork boy toy I have. He's pretty special too. He broke my curse. 

Usagi Tsukino: I think 2026 can be an incredible year for us! Let's give thanks and look towards the future!

4. EBW Women's Championship Contender Tournament: Cheerleader Jenny vs. Hilda Iceheart
-Hilda entered with icy speed and relentlessness, dodging Jenny’s early offense and scoring quick roll-ups that kept the crowd buzzing. Jenny absorbed the momentum and slowly turned the tide, grounding Hilda with calculated strikes and forcing her into uncomfortable positions.

Hilda rallied late, landing a flurry of kicks and a near-fall that stunned the arena. But one misstep was all Jenny needed. She baited Hilda into the corner and delivered a brutal Hip Attack, ending the match decisively.
Winner: Cheerleader Jenny via Hip Attack -> Pin 

Larry Grim: Wow! Cheerleader Jenny looks like she finally found her groove as a cheerleader on this one. High spirits and a sweet hip attack! 

Apple Kid: I'd love to see her finally shake off that gruff biker image she had with her sister and make something of herself. She took on this persona as a way of showing support to Jammer, but that doesn't mean she's secondary or an after thought. She could become the EBW Women's Champion! 

Larry Grim: Very true!

Backstage

EBW Champion Jammer stood outside of the Dan Club locker room as Benjamin came out with Officer Lainey Strong. 

Jammer: Heya Benji, good luck out there tonight. 

Officer Lainey Strong: GET BACK! 

Jammer: Whoa! 

Benjamin: Relax Lainey! Tis my comrade and friend, Jammer. 

Jammer: Hey, she's just looking out for you. Benji, Dan Club has been synonymous with victory and overcoming our challenges. I know Dan is at home resting up, watching, and expecting that from. So am I. Because we believe in our friend. We know you can do it. 

Benjamin: Thank you, my friend. I'm certain that Luca Blight is watching and waiting. Tack Angel has been an incredible opponent, that has constantly forced me to grind it out and level up to match him. I was able to beat both you and Dan to become EBW Champion, but I couldn't overcome him. This time? Yeah...maybe this time. Time to put myself to the test.

Jammer smiled as Benjamin made his way towards the ring. He turned around to see the EBW Super Champion standing behind him, and the crowd popped so loud, they could hear it backstage. 

Jammer: Well there YOU are. I was wondering if you were going to be here tonight. 

Takumi Inui: I represent all of EBW. I wouldn't miss this. It's not my night though. It's about everyone in the ring. 

Jammer: That's true. You and I, we could be in the ring at some point soon. Luca Blight gets the next shot, but when that's over. I could decide to make Victory Explosion 20 extra special this year. Something to think about. 

Takumi Inui: I have a lot to think about.

5. EBW Eagleland Championship: Tack Angel(c) vs. Benjamin
-Main event time, as the EBW Eagleland Championship encounter was tense and deliberate. Tack Angel and Benjamin have had incredible bouts in the past, and this one looked to be just as good. Tack Angel controlled the pace, targeting Benjamin’s core and neck to neutralize the Spear. Benjamin fought through punishment, answering with heavy strikes and near-falls that had the crowd on edge. If Benji had any fatigue after his match earlier in the night, it wasn't obvious. He was fired up, and pushed Tack to really work. 

BUT...just as Benjamin seized momentum, Luca Blight stormed the ring, pushing Lainey Strong out of the way and laying Benjamin out in a not so shocking ambush. The referee immediately called for the bell.
Winner: Benjamin via DQ

Larry Grim: NO! COME ON! DAMMIT LUCA! 

Apple Kid: Not like this! 

Larry Grim: Wait look! Tack is helping Benjamin fight off Luca! Here comes the EBW Champion as well! They're pushing the bloodthirsty savage back! Jammer getting in the face of his challenger at New Year Rising 2026! It looks like Tack is grabbing a microphone! 

Tack Angel: No! Not like this! Absolutely not! This is 2026! We can't let the show end like this! Benjamin? Are you alright?

Benjamin: I'm alright. 

Tack Angel: Are you still hungry?!

Benjamin: ABSOLUTELY! 

Tack Angel: Then ring that bell! We're still doing this! 

Larry Grim: WHOA! Tack Angel is restarting the match! I doubt Boss M's would argue this. 

Apple Kid: She has her thoughts about Tack, but she probably loves this decision. Let's do this!

6. EBW Eagleland Championship: Tack Angel(c) vs. Benjamin
-The referee hesitated.

The crowd didn’t.

After Luca Blight’s attack robbed the first match of its finish, Tack Angel demanded the restart himself, standing in the center of the ring, championship held high. Not out of pride, but out of defiance. He refused to let Benjamin’s moment and the first Xcite of 2026 be tainted by that controversy.

The bell rang again and the tone changed instantly.

Gone was the cautious pacing of the first bout. Both men charged, colliding with strikes that echoed through the gym. Tack Angel targeted the ribs and neck, knowing exactly what he had to take away: the Spear. Benjamin answered by hammering Tack with forearms and short lariats, forcing the champion backward step by step.

Tack slowed the pace deliberately, dragging Benjamin into the corner, grinding him down with clinch strikes and knee lifts. He attempted to smother the match, to turn it into survival rather than momentum. Benjamin absorbed it grimacing, bending, but never breaking.

A near fall stunned the crowd when Tack countered a Spear attempt into a crushing slam. 1-2-kickout.

Tack tried to lift Benji into the Torture Rack, but he managed to make it to the ropes and held on for dear life. 

Benjamin rallied, firing back with everything left in the tank. A spine-jarring slam. A running knee. The Spear connected clean, brutal, center of the ring.

ONE! TWO! Tack kicked out.

The crowd exploded.

Benjamin didn’t argue. He didn’t hesitate. He pulled Tack up, then drove him down with the Masamune, putting every ounce of will and ambition into the move.

1-2-3! 

The building came unglued. 
Winner: Benjamin via Spear x Masamune -> Pin -> NEW EBW Eagleland Champion! 

Larry Grim: NEW EBW Eagleland Champion! NEW EBW Eagleland Champion! Incredible bout! Thank you Tack for restarting that match! Thank you for giving us all that match and giving Benjamin the opportunity. It was a risk, it was a gamble, and it didn't work out for you, but you knew that going in, and we appreciate the effort. 

Apple Kid: The Star Spangled Prince is raising Benjamin's hand, and presenting him with the title, what a class act. They're sharing a look, like they're both trying to remember something, but it looks like they're just shaking it off and moving on. 

Larry Grim: We're not sure what the future holds for the Star Spangled Prince, but we know that 2026 is going to be explosive. We'll see you next time! 

Last edited by Machismo (1/04/2026 3:43 am)

Outside of Renegade Arena

The Samurai Ifrit team all appeared at once to enter the building, as fans surrounded them for autographs. They were happy to oblige, until Boomtown appeared at the doorway. 

Boomtown: Well look at what we got here! Showing up fashionably late again huh? Fashionably late. 

Zyro Kurogane: Oh look, it's Boom Boom! If you're looking to pick a fight, I think we're all ready. 

Dragon Shiryu: I know we are. 

Boomtown: Oh, for once, I'm not here to rearrange your stupid smirk. I just wanted to see something. I wanted to see how you all operate, when you're all looking to stab each other in the back. Zyro-K you're a dick bag, and we all know it. You want that Super Championship. You'll take it from Takumi without a second thought. Shiryu, you wouldn't steal MY pillar spot if you weren't ready to do the same. You'll take the World Championship and then YOU'LL be the one to challenge your long time partner. It's a group about to EXPLODE, and I'm here for it. If I can do anything to INFLUENCE that happening, well, that's what the Influencer does. 

Zyro Kurogane: You think you're clever? You think we haven't all thought about this already? These two have my respect, YOU DO NOT, so while I WOULD stab YOU in the back and TWIST the knife, I'll be sure to handle my buisness with the Dragron and the Super Champ face to face. You ain't stirring up drama between us. 

Boomtown: Just so we're all clear you intend to beat Takumi for the Super Championship? 

Zyro Kurogane: ...That's right. 

Boomtown: Takumi? How do you feel about that? 

Takumi Inui: It's expected. I'll have to disappoint him.

Boomtown: Shiryu?

Dragon Shiryu: ...He may not get the chance. 

Boomtown: You three are going to tear each other apart. It's only a matter of time. Hehehe. HAHAHAHAHA! 

Zyro Kurogane: Did you know I can't stand that prick?

Dragon Shiryu: You may have mentioned it once or twice.

Saturn City Hospital

The heart monitor beeped over and over. 

Sal stood barefoot on the cold tile floor, hospital gown flapping just enough to remind him of how undignified this whole situation was. One arm was still bandaged. The other held his IV stand hostage like a reluctant dance partner.

Sal Paradise: Okay. In, out. Five minutes. No nurses. No demons. No—

The hallway lights flickered.

Sal froze.

That wasn’t a normal hospital flicker.

The air grew heavier, like the room was holding its breath.

From the far end of the hall came the sound of dragging footsteps.

Slow.

Deliberate.

Sal’s eyes widened.

Sal Paradise: You have got to be kidding me.

He moved fast—shockingly fast for a man who had almost died recently. He yanked the blanket back onto the bed, arranged pillows into a vaguely human shape, and slapped the call button so the monitor spiked just enough to sell the illusion.

Then he ducked behind the door, clutching the nearest available weapon.

A bed pan.

He grimaced.

The lights dimmed as The Auditor reached the doorway.

His body was a nightmare of scars and deep, uneven cuts, like something had tried to carve him apart and failed out of spite. Black ichor seeped from between jagged seams of flesh. His face—if it could be called that—was partially obscured by his shades covering hollow eyes glowing faintly red.

He stood in the doorway, staring at the bed.

The Auditor: Sal Paradise.

Sal didn’t move. Didn’t breathe.

The Auditor stepped inside. The door shut on its own.

The Auditor: I must admit...I am surprised you survived.

He approached the bed slowly.

The Auditor: You see, I have faced Celestials who screamed. Infernals who begged. Beings who believed themselves eternal.

He leaned closer to the lump under the sheets.

The Auditor: But Jamie OD…

His voice lowered. Something like discomfort crept in.

The Auditor: He unsettles me.

Sal’s brow furrowed despite himself.

The Auditor straightened.

The Auditor: You mortals misunderstand Hell. You fear it because you are told to. Because it burns. Because it punishes.

He turned, gesturing vaguely, like a lecturer addressing a very dead class.

The Auditor: Hell is pure cold....pure evil. Structured. Purposeful. Predictable.

A pause.

The Auditor: And Jamie OD crawled out of Hell.

He stared back at the bed.

The Auditor: Not expelled. Not summoned. Escaped.

Silence.

The Auditor: Now I may merely be from the Void, but I do believe that is not something Hell allows.

Sal’s eyes widened.

The Auditor: I have never seen such wrongness. Not even in the deepest fractures of existence. And the most amusing part?

He chuckled. A dry, broken sound.

The Auditor: No one will ever believe you.

Sal’s grip tightened on the bed pan.

The Auditor turned back toward the bed.

The Auditor: They will call it trauma. Hallucination. Delusion....or just "wrestling nonsense". Hehe.

He leaned forward—

CLANG.

The sound echoed like a gunshot.

The Auditor collapsed sideways, black ichor splattering across pristine hospital tiles.

Sal stepped out from behind the door, breathing hard, holding the dented bed pan like Excalibur.

Sal Paradise: Yeah, well.

He looked down at the unconscious cosmic horror.

Sal Paradise: Tell Hell I said it needs better security. That was terrible.

He tossed the bed pan aside and straightened his gown. 

Sal Paradise: It's drafty in here.




Tommy Dukes: Welcome to the Renegade Arena for the first Havok of 2026! I'm excited! Are you excited? 

Nerma: I'm always excited, but you're too excited! Now you have to hide behind the desk! 

Tommy Dukes: It's not my fault I'm sitting next to my sexy wife! Also, I maybe have finished off the New Year's cham-pag-en. If you catch my drift! *hick* 

Nerma: What in the world was The Auditor talking about? I'm glad Sal Paradise got out of there, but that whole thing made me more concerned if even The Auditor is scared of Jamie OD. 

Tommy Dukes: Why do you think I started drinking! I saw that footage earlier today! I needed some liquid courage tonight, but we're still going to have a good time. I don't believe Jamie OD is here, so we're safe! That being said, we have a lot at stake tonight. 

Nerma: We will have new Women's World Champion tonight, and we will have new World Tag Team Champions tonight. I'm also told we might hear from the BRAND NEW EBW Super Women's Champion, Hope Mach! That was a shocking surprise. She now has free reign to jump from brand to brand, but she wanted to make her first appearance with us, because she's a RENEGADE! Yeah! 

Tommy Dukes: The night is full of eliminators. The Renegades and Lady Renegades are going to go all out, and you all eyes are on the victors. Hope Mach especially should watch out, because the Black Diamond Syndicate is coming for the gold. We're also told that EBW Super Tag Team Champions, RRR, have declined to appear tonight. They are being disrespectful to Fenrir, who are attempting to come for their gold. We have a hell of a show for you tonight, so let's get started with Heather Mach taking on Darkness Aoi in the Women's World Eliminator match!

EBW: Havok "New Game+ 2026"
Renegade Arena, Saturn City
ENT

1. Women's World Eliminator: Heather Mach vs. Darkness Aoi
-Heather Mach came out first, all confidence and momentum, looking every bit like a future champion. She controlled the early match with crisp strikes and grounded grappling, refusing to let Darkness Aoi settle into her rhythm. Every time Aoi tried to slow the pace or bait Heather into a mistake, Heather answered with raw aggression and precision. Darkness Aoi, however, doesn’t panic.

She absorbed punishment, and begged for more.

The match began to turn when the lights dimmed just slightly—barely enough for the front row to notice. Heather went for a Machbuster attempt, but her footing slipped for half a second.

That’s when Hashim Al-Singh appeared at ringside.

The referee never saw the interference clearly, only Heather suddenly reeling, clutching her leg as if something unseen had struck her. The crowd erupted in confusion and fury as Hashim leaned casually against the barricade, smiling.

Darkness Aoi didn’t hesitate.

Darkness Bomber.

Three seconds later, it was over.

Heather stared up at the lights afterward, furious, humiliated, and very aware that this wasn’t finished, not by a long shot.
Winner: Darkness Aoi via Darkness Bomber -> Pin 

Tommy Dukes: What the what?! *hick*

Nerma: I was told RRR were NOT going to be here tonight, but Hashim Al-Singh attacked Heather?! How could he?! Damn him! He's grabbing a mic! 

Hashim Al-Singh: Awww, look at that. Heather cracked under pressure. Maybe that bitch whore should cover her face, and be subservient to a man like me. I will make a woman out of you. I will let you know that you exist to pleasure me. This is all a farce. Women are not to be seen or heard, and-

Tommy Dukes: Here comes Trevor Mach! He's running down the ramp, and the crowd is going wild! Hashim is being chased out of the building! Lakitus, follow them!

The Lakitu followed as Hashim ran backstage, knocking over catering to try and slow down Trevor. He quickly made it to the parking lot, getting into his car, but before he could drive off



Trevor got to the car and started punching at the windshield. Hashim quickly drove off, but Trevor got into his Trans-Am and drove after him. 

Nerma: Whoa! Looks like Hashim caught Trevor on a bad day! Heather is being helped to the back by Derek and Dougie, who are in action later tonight, but first we have the former World Champion Subculture and long time friend Picky Minch in action against Boomtown and a mystery partner. No, it's not Generator or Hotlanta. They are still at the back of the line for title shots after they lost their bid at the Super Tag Team Championships. Speaking of those, we can clearly see the EBW Super Tag Team Champions in the VIP seating, meaning yes, they are all here, and the announcement was a lie. Anything to get the upperhand. They call that "Izzat" and that seems to be the moral code of RRR....or lack thereof. Well, let's find out who Boomtown's partner is going to b-



Nerma: OH SHIT! IT'S JAMIE OD! 

Tommy Dukes: I'm hiding! Nerma run! 

Nerma: We can't! 

Tommy Dukes: SECURITY! AAAHHH!!!

2. World Tag Team Championship Eliminator: Boomtown/Jamie OD vs. Subculture/Picky Minch
-This match never settled into a rhythm, because Jamie OD wouldn’t let it. From the opening bell, Jamie was unhinged.

Before Boomtown could even establish position, Jamie stormed across the ring and blasted Picky Minch with a forearm so hard it echoed through Renegade Arena. The referee barely had time to call for order before Jamie dragged Picky up by the hair and hurled him into the corner with reckless force.

Boomtown shouted for him to tag out. Jamie ignored him, prompting Boomtown to laugh and pull out his phone. He jaw jacked on a life stream as Jamie OD did all the work. 

Subculture tried to slow things down, but every attempt to regroup only made Jamie worse. He stomped Picky in the ropes. He clubbed Subculture off the apron. He grabbed the referee by the shirt, not aggressively, but wrongly, like he’d forgotten where he was for a second.

The referee issued the first warning.

Jamie laughed. Subculture baited him, drawing Jamie into the corner where strikes piled up, one, two, three, until the referee was screaming for a break. Jamie turned the tide and landed his own. Jamie didn’t stop until Boomtown physically yanked him back by the shoulder.

Subculture seized the opening, swarming Boomtown while Jamie stood motionless on the apron, fingers twitching like he was restraining something barely contained. Picky Minch recovered enough to lay in shots, isolating Boomtown with a Hagen Suplex and hammering him with quick tags and desperation offense.

Boomtown took a brutal double-team that nearly ended it.

Finally, Picky went for a high-risk move, but Boomtown countered, and Jamie tagged back in.  

Jamie exploded into the ring like a weapon fired from point-blank range. He obliterated Picky with a knee that folded him inside out. Subculture rushed in and ate a spinning strike that sent him tumbling through the ropes. Boomtown held him at bay outside while Jamie stalked Picky. 

Jamie drove Picky down with the PK and pinned him for the 1-2-3! 

Jamie stayed kneeling over Picky even after the three-count, breathing heavy, knuckles white, until Boomtown pulled him up and raised his arm for him.

Jamie didn’t look at the crowd.

He didn’t look at Boomtown.

He just stared forward...smiling.
Winners: Boomtown/Jamie OD[o] via PK to Picky Minch -> Pin 

Nerma: Whoa! That was vicious! Subbie and Picky were not ready for Jamie OD to fight like that. They weren't ready to fight the Hooligan from Hell at all! 

Tommy Dukes: Something is definitely wrong with him. He had a facade before, even when he was the Firestarter I wasn't this freaked out. That was a gimmick...this is real... this is way too real...and I'm sobering up very fast.

Little Mac's Office

RRR's manager and Little Mac rival Great Tiger, entered the office like a man on a mission.

Great Tiger: You need to stop this, now! 

Little Mac: Great Tiger. You never call. You never write. You don't even knock. You just show up, out of the blue, and start making demands. I don't even know what you're talking about. 

Great Tiger: Trevor Mach! Fenrir! 

Little Mac: What's the problem? Trevor is the VBW Champion. He's also a free agent. He dropped the contracts for a pay per appearance deal so he could go wherever he wanted. I don't see the issue. 

Great Tiger: You are showing bias. You know what he's doing and what he's capable of, and yet you CHOOSE to let him in! 

Little Mac: If I didn't let him in, he'd show up anyway. Fenrir are dangerous after all, and he's off the chain, so I don't know what you expect from me. 

Great Tiger: You were a terrible fighter who got lucky, and you're a terrible Boss who needs replaced. I'm sure I can find allies on the EBW Board of Directors, and take this job. 

Little Mac: That's the plan anyways, isn't it? You come here, you take the job, and you fill EBW with your friends and family, so you can funnel that money back to Dalaam. Is that right? I wonder how Prince Poo feels about his subjects being so disgraceful. Oh wait, you call it "Izzat" right? Personally, I always preferred Mu, and-

Great Tiger: Do not insult me! Do not insult my people or my honor! HOW DARE YOU! My phone is ringing! I'll be back. This isn't over. 

Little Mac: I dare. *sigh* Why couldn't it have been Glass Joe that came back to haunt me.

Great Tiger walked out of the room into the hallway to take the call.

Great Tiger: *on the phone* Hello? Hashim? Where are you?

Saturn City Supermarket

The camera cuts in abruptly, shaky and handheld.

Hashim Al-Singh was pacing the frozen foods aisle, phone pressed tight to his ear. His voice was low, urgent.

Hashim Al-Singh: No, no, listen to me. I lost him. I lost Trevor. He vanished, just gone. I ducked through the parking garage, I doubled back, I—

He stops, glancing down the aisle.

Hashim Al-Singh: I’m in a filthy grocery store. It's not halal, but nobody expects anything here.

He exhaled, running a hand through his hair.

Hashim Al-Singh: Yeah. Still in Saturn City. I’ll lay low. Cool off. Let things—

A voice BOOMED over the store’s PA system.

Trevor Mach (over PA): ATTENTION, SHOPPERS.

Hashim froze.

Trevor Mach (PA): We have an ass beating on Aisle Two! Ass beating on Aisle Two!

The Lakitu whipped around just as Trevor Mach came flying into frame, already swinging.

CRASH.

Hashim barely got his phone down before Trevor tackled him into a display of boxed cereal. Cornflakes and granola exploded everywhere.



The fight was instant chaos.

Trevor hammered Hashim with wild right hands, driving him backward into a stack of shopping carts. Metal screeched. A shopper screamed off-camera.

Hashim scrambled, grabbing a loaf of bread and smashing it across Trevor’s face.

Trevor barely reacted.

Trevor Mach: That all you got?!

Trevor grabbed Hashim by the jacket and launched him face first into a freezer door. The glass rattled but doesn’t break. Hashim staggered, grabbing a frozen turkey and hurling it into Trevor’s chest.

Trevor stumbles back then laughed.

Trevor Mach: I'm not in the mood for turkey. I'd rather have ham!

Trevor tossed pork products at Hashim, and he screeched and tried to avoid them at all costs. 

Trevor charged again, slipping on spilled produce but still tackling Hashim into the meat section. Packs of steaks flew everywhere as they crashed into the counter.

Hashim clawed free and swung wildly, knocking over a pyramid of canned goods. Cans roll everywhere. Trevor grabbed one and clocked Hashim in the ribs with it.

Hashim reeled, trying to escape down another aisle, but Trevor cut him off, hoisting him up, and slamming him onto a checkout conveyor belt.

The belt started moving.

Hashim flailed as groceries pile up on top of him.

Trevor Mach leaned over him, furious, breath heaving.

Trevor Mach: Do you have a barcode? How how much are you worth?

Security finally rushed in. Too late.

Trevor grabbed Hashim one last time and launched him into a stack of soda cases.

BOOM.

Cans burst. Foam sprays everywhere.

Trevor stood tall in the wreckage, chest heaving, fists clenched, surrounded by shattered groceries and horrified shoppers.

Security swarmed him as the feed cuts out.

-

Tommy Dukes: Wow! That was insane! 

Nerma: Fenrir are dangerous and unpredictable outside of the ring, but just as dangerous inside of the ring. Let's see how Jet Havok deals with that fact as they head to the ring for World Tag Team Championship elimination match!

3. World Tag Team Championship Eliminator: Derek Mach/Dougie Mach vs. Degrees/Jackson Kain
-This match was a clinic in Mach family Fenrir cohesion.

Degrees and Jackson Kain came in with power and bravado, but Derek and Dougie Mach wrestled like men who had grown up fighting side by side. Quick tags, seamless transitions, and constant pressure wore their opponents down.

Jackson Kain tried to brute force his way through Derek, but Dougie’s timing cut him off repeatedly. Degrees attempted to rally, only to be caught mid-charge.

Chaos Theory.

Derek didn’t even need help on the pin.

The Machs advanced, staring straight up the ramp afterward, already thinking about who stood in their way.
Winners: Derek Mach[o]/Dougie Mach via Chaos Theory to Degrees -> Pin 

Tommy Dukes: Amazing! Fenrir took apart two former World Champions with reckless abandon. I think it was just their night. 

Nerma: Yeah, we don't normally see Degrees and Kain get rocked like that. Wait, I hear that we've got the EBW Super Women's Champion on deck. Let's hear from her!

Backstage

Heather Mach stood by to a thunderous reaction, as she held up the EBW Super Women's Championship. She placed her hand to the wall to feel the vibrations as the Renegades stomped their feet. 

Hope Mach: *signing* I want to thank every single person who believed in me when it would have been easier not to. I hear you, just not the way you hear me. I hear you with the stomping feet. I hear you with the signs. I hear you in the way the ring shakes when you cheer. My path to this title wasn't quiet. It was loud with doubt, but I didn't listen, because I can't listen. Hehe, just a deaf joke. I did listen. I listened to all of you. If anyone steps up to me with a belt, then I will step up to you. That's a promise.
  
4. Women's World Eliminator: Val Dorado vs. Wendy Mustang
-Wendy Mustang brought her new found ego, firing off early strikes and trying to keep Val Dorado on the defensive. For a moment, it looked like Wendy’s relentless energy might overwhelm the sister of Rey Dorado.

Val adjusted.

She slowed the match, grounded Wendy, and began dismantling her piece by piece. Every counter felt calculated, every movement intentional. When Wendy went for the Front Flip Lariat, Val evaded it and caught her clean.

Doradorana.

No hesitation. No wasted motion. A shocking 1-2-3 that had Wendy baffled. 
Winner: Val Dorado via Doradorana -> Pin 

Nerma: Val Dorado with the win?! Wow! Val with the win! Diamond Rosa is trying to get to Val, but here comes Kaoru and Faris Kain to block her off! Jet Havok ready to fight off the Black Diamond Syndicate too!? Outstanding!

Tommy Dukes: What's not outstanding, is that up next, we're going to see Jamie OD again. He and Jamie OD are going to take on Fenrir for the World Tag Team Championships, and that match is NEXT! 

5. World Tag Team Championship Decision: Boomtown/Jamie OD vs. Derek Mach/Dougie Mach
-This match felt important and dangerous the moment the bell rang.

Derek and Dougie Mach entered focused, intense, and unified. This was family business, and they treated it like a war. Boomtown and Jamie OD followed slowly. Boomtown had his phone out, talking to is, while Jamie wandered in eyes unfocused, shoulders loose, jaw set like he was grinding his teeth.

Fenrir started strong, isolating Boomtown early with crisp tags and relentless pressure. Derek’s technical precision grounded Boomtown while Dougie hammered him with heavy strikes, keeping Jamie stranded on the apron. Every time Boomtown reached for the tag, Jamie leaned back, pacing, muttering to himself.

Boomtown finally broke free and dove for the corner.

Jamie tagged in and immediately sprinted across the ring and obliterated Derek with a forearm that echoed through Renegade Arena.

The referee lost control almost instantly.

Jamie refused to disengage. He stomped Derek in the corner long past the count. Dougie rushed in to pull him off and ate a headbutt for his trouble. Jamie laughed before throwing Derek face first into the turnbuckles again.

The referee threatened disqualification. Jamie stepped directly into the official’s space, staring him down until Boomtown physically dragged him away. The crowd buzzed. Half excited, half uneasy.

Fenrir capitalized on the chaos. Dougie clipped Jamie’s knee and Derek followed with sharp strikes, finally knocking Jamie down. They tried to keep him grounded, working together, but every hit seemed to make Jamie worse.

He bit Derek’s forehead.

Jamie broke free with animalistic force, flooring both Machs with wild strikes. He tagged Boomtown in, not gently, but with a violent slap across the chest, then stood on the apron, gripping the rope so hard his knuckles turned white.

Boomtown cleared the ring with urgency, sensing this was the moment.

The final sequence was pure carnage. Derek went for Chaos Theory, Jamie muscled out. Dougie tried to intervene, but Boomtown intercepted him with a brutal clothesline.

Boomtown hoisted Dougie.

Here Comes the Boom!

The impact shook the ring.

Boomtown collapsed onto Dougie for the pin, forearm grinding across his throat. The referee counted quickly.

1-2-3!

Boomtown celebrated, raising the belts, but Jamie yanked his arm free and stared at Fenrir as officials checked on them. He didn’t celebrate. He didn’t acknowledge the crowd.

He just smiled.
Winners: Boomtown[o]/Jamie OD via Here Comes the Boom! to Dougie Mach -> Pin -> NEW World Tag Team Champions! 

Tommy Dukes: OH NO! 

Nerma: Fenrir were the favorites to win until Jamie OD got involved, and now it looks like he and Boomtown are the new World Tag Team Champions! Boomtown was LoveBoom! with Sal Paradise. Does that make them BoomKick!?

Tommy Dukes: Why don't you ask Sal Paradise! He's right there!

Sal Paradise ran to the ring with his dented bed pan and rushed into the ring as Boomtown and Jamie OD backed out. Jamie held onto Boomtown and cackled while Sal screamed for Boomtown to get away from him. 

Nerma: Sal Paradise is back! 

Tommy Dukes: And he does NOT care that he's wearing a hospital gown. The ladies are getting a show of his bare ass. Can we get that blurred out perhaps?! TV-MA! TV-MA! 

Nerma: *sigh* The realm of the Renegades is crazy right now, and we still have one match to go, it's the main event, and from what I understand, Diamond Rosa and Wendy Mustang are being barred from ringside for this championship bout. Kaoru and Faris Kain seem to get guarding the door JUST to make sure? Here we go. 

Tommy Dukes: LET'S TAKE IT TO THE RING!

6. Women's World Championship Decision: Darkness Aoi vs. Val Dorado-
-Main event time, and the Women's World Championship was on the line. Darkness Aoi entered methodical, composed, and dangerous, the earlier damage from the night barely registering on her face. Val Dorado, a former Interim Champion, followed with calm confidence, the challenger who had earned her spot the hard way and wasn’t about to let it slip.

The opening minutes were tense and technical. Aoi tried to slow the pace immediately, using clinches and corner pressure to draw Val into her world. Val responded with clean counters, refusing to be suffocated, constantly circling and striking at precise angles.

The crowd split down the middle.

Aoi began targeting Val’s midsection, grinding her down with knees and short strikes, whispering something unheard as she wrenched Val into holds just long enough to sap her strength. Val fought out repeatedly, frustration building but never boiling over.

Aoi went for the Darkness Bomber early.

Val escaped.

That was the first crack.

Aoi grew more aggressive, her patience thinning as Val started winning exchanges. Val landed a series of sharp strikes and a spinebuster that rattled the ring, nearly ending it. Aoi barely kicked out.

The champion rolled to the ropes, eyes wide for the first time.

The finish came fast after that.

Aoi attempted one last Darkness Bomber, desperation creeping in, but Val slipped free, hooked the arms, and drove her down with Doradorana.

The impact was clean.

Decisive.

Three seconds later, Renegade Arena erupted.

Val Dorado sat up in disbelief as the referee handed her the championship. Aoi stared at the lights, stunned, the realization settling in that tonight wasn’t hers—no matter how much darkness she brought.

Val stood tall, belt raised, tears in her eyes as pyro flared behind her.
Winner: Val Dorado via Doradorana -> Pin -> NEW Women's World Champion!  



Nerma: WE HAVE A NEW WOMEN'S WORLD CHAMPION! Not Interim this time! She is THE Women's World Champion! 

Tommy Dukes: Darkness Aoi was moments away from a double championship reign, but Val Dorado pulled out that legendary Dorado spirit and pulled out a win. This is her first ever true World Championship reign! 

Nerma: Val Dorado has finally done it! What a way to open 2026! We have New Year Rising and the Geist Bowl coming up! We're just getting started! The pieces are set for a chaotic year. We'll see you NEXT TIME!

Last edited by Machismo (1/09/2026 5:44 am)

Ninten: Were you expecting someone else? It's Ninten! 

Ana: And Ana! 

Ninten: We're still very much helping Ness with TUE and where he wants to take it, but we're taking over this episode of EBW World, because we've also been named the lead commentators for the upcoming Geist Bowl! 

Ana: We get to be the ones who explain the full details! This upcoming week, two teams are going to be formed. One team on Xcite and the other on Havok. This first event will be Xcite vs. Havok. Those teams will take part in a 5-on-5 Elimination Tag, to determine the first event National Champions. The winning team will receive a trophy and a cash prize for their efforts. It's not your normal elimination tag. This match will have no outside interference, and it will have no leaving the ring to fight. You have to stay IN the ring. In fact, if you're thrown out you are eliminated! Both teams will have a time out to use as well. No quick tags either. You must remain in the ring for at least one minute before tagging back out. 

Ninten: Now we know that we need to find two teams, but we already have the Captains. Those were picked specifically by Boss M's and Little Mac. Boss M's didn't choose Luca Blight this time, as he was one of the reasons Team Xcite beat Team Havok last year at Collision for the Team Rings, but since then, he's proven to be nearly uncontrollable, and now accepting outside assistance from a mysterious benefactor. No this time, Boss M's has chosen the NEW EBW Eagleland Champion, Benjamin!



Benjamin: It's an honor to be bequethed the title of Captain, after spending my life as a knight, and a Warrior of Light. Eagleland wasn't my first home, but it became my home, and I'm proud to be its champion, as I lead a team of Xciters against the Renegades of Havok! I'm told this Geist Bowl is a big deal, like the Superb Owl of football. I only have two things to say about that. What IS the Superb Owl...and what is football? What? I honestly don't know.

-

Ana: And the Captain of the Havok team has also been chosen. Takumi Inui, the EBW Super Champion was apparently exempt, but the first choice from Little Mac was apparently ALWAYS...."Trigger" Cade Yaggis!



Cade Yaggis: The "Trigger Man" is coming at you! You know a lot of people wonder why I'm called "Trigger", and they're pretty close to finding out if they keep on pushing. I recently worked very hard to become the Television Champion, and now I get to lead Team Havok in the match against Team Xcite. Benjamin, you're one of my best friends. I wouldn't be where I am with my time with Dan Club. You guys gave me a chance, you gave me a life, and you helped me figure out who I am. Nothing in my past defines my future. I learned that from Dan, Benji, and Jammer. That being said, this is competition, and I will take on all of you if I have to, because I want the records to show that when the first ever Bowl event took place in EBW, the winning team was captained by TRIGGER! ....Tack Angel is just staring at me...over there. Steve, do you see that? I'm not even- is he on Team Xcite? Why is he staring? 

-

Ninten: So yeah, we have the Captains, and we have a card. This will be a simulcast special on ENN AND ENT, so you're gonna wanna check it out on either channel. We also know that VBW have sanctioned a VBW Championship bout between Trevor Mach and Hashim Al-Singh. A little known fact is that Trevor Mach held that title since August of 2024, when he beat Poo for it at Feel the Heat 2024 in Reefside. It's his second time holding the title after temporarily unifying it with the EBW Championship at Victory Explosion 2. That's right 2. This year it's 20, so that was a while ago! Hashim Al-Singh wants payback after what Trevor did to him this last week on Havok, and this could be the way to get it. We also have former CXJ Champion Maseo Kurenai and Keisuke Nago challenging the NEW EBW Tag Team Champions Rise and Grind for the titles! Why is it a Lumberjack match? To keep Kiva away, as no one knows what's going on in his mind since returning from self imposed exile. Why is he getting in the business of his son and his former ally?




EBW: The Geist Bowl
Geist Arena, Hanta City 
ENN/ENT

1. VBW Championship: Trevor Mach(c) vs. Hashim Al-Singh 
2. Xcite - EBW Tag Team Championships Lumberjack: Grind(c)/Java Coffington(c) vs. Masao Kurenai/Keisuke Nago
3. 5-on-5 Elimination Tag(Bowl Rules): Team Xcite TBA vs. Team Havok TBA 

-



Zyro Kurogane sat alone in a tailored suit, World Championship belt resting on the table beside a crystal glass. He swirled his drink, not even looking at the camera at first.

Zyro Kurogane: Funny thing about success.

He takes a sip.

Zyro Kurogane: When you finally get it...everyone suddenly decides they know what you should do with it.

He glanced at the belt, then at the camera.

Zyro Kurogane: Everywhere I go, I hear the same thing. Am I cashing in? Am I going after the Super Championship? Am I stepping into Takumi Inui's world? They act like this-

He tapped the World Championship.

Zyro Kurogane: —is just a receipt to be turned in.

He leaned forward.

Zyro Kurogane: You people have forgotten something. This isn't a stepping stone. This isn't a footnote. This is the prize that everybody bled for. The one that closed careers. The one that made legends. Before they talked about making something "higher" this was the mountain...and Zyro-K is standing on top of it.

He lifted his glass.

Zyro Kurogane: Now don’t get me wrong. I know what’s coming. Dragon Shiryu and I? We’re going to steal the show. We’re going to make headlines. We’re going to make money. We’re going to make noise so loud you can hear it from Saturn City to Solandra.

He smiled.

Zyro Kurogane: But all that flash? That spotlight? That belongs right here. I'm going to remind everyone how important this title is. I'm going to wipe off the stain of it being considered the stepping stone. Will I become Super Champion? Yes. But I have a different goal in mind than anyone else. I have a dream. I don't want two titles that lead to one. I want one title. I don't like this system. It occured to me...just as I'm talking in fact...how much it bothers me. EBW is the best promotion in the world, and it deserves one true champion. It deserves Zyro-K, Bey-bey.

EBW: Xcite
Twoson Mall, Twoson
ENN

1. EBW Women's Championship Contender Tournament: Makoto Angel vs. Erica 
2. Team Xcite Qualifier Tag: Seto Kaiba/Johnny Starbound vs. Yami Yugi/Jaden Yuki
3. EBW Women's Championship Contender Tournament: Usagi Tsukino vs. Queen Beryl
4. Team Xcite Qualifier Tag: Colby Roads/CP Munk vs. Matt/Tai 
5. 6-Man Tag: Jammer/Tack Angel/Seiya Kou vs. Luca Blight/Troy/Snakebite 

EBW: Havok 
Howlers Gymnasium, South Town
ENT

1. Intergender Singles: Hashim Al-Singh vs. Heather Mach
2. Team Havok Qualifier 8-Man: Subculture/Picky Minch/?/? vs. Degrees/Jackson Kain/Jeff Andonuts/Carter Grayson
3. Lady Renegades Non-Title Tag: Darkness Aoi/Wendy Mustang vs. Christy Angel/Alison Chains
4. Singles: Dougie Mach vs. Komaram Bheem 
5. Bushido Rules Singles: Derek Mach vs. Rama Raju 

Last edited by Machismo (Today 3:44 am)