Jennings Office

Noah Jennings: Wrestling fans all over, welcome to the start of EBW's Golden Week. I love gold, but my greedy nature aside, we celebrate this week as a tradition that tends to take place around the same time as the Golden Week in Edo, a week long holiday. We tend to take it more literally, with gold, cash, and many other prizes are stake all this week. It's your best bet to go for the gold, both figuratively and lit-

Tess: Out of my way Jennings, excuse me, "boss". We got tons to look forward to sure. All of you will get exactly what you want, because tonight isn't just that "Battlebowl" thing, but we'll also be crowning the first ever "Miss EBW". Now, a lot of women have signed on the dotted line to appear, and are willing to do what it takes to win. At least, I hope they are. I have some fun ways of figuring out how this is going to go down. Winning matter ladies. It truly does. The Eisenritter have been my ideal for the future. Then we have my Muscle Girl Security, and new talent like Eve and BeShemoth. You want to stay relevant? You'd better win. That being said, the crown comes with special "responsibilities". Keep that in mind as we go forward. Oh, I hope you're looking forward to it, because I sure am! You should all be grateful. I said...heh....be grateful.

Noah Jennings: ...Thanks Tess. I also give a sarcastic thanks to The Legion. You scrambled the Golden Lottery results, I don't care for it. We chose not to redo them. We chose to keep it the way it is, because the conflict might be fun. However, do it again, and you won't find yourselves getting a chance to add yourself into this war between EBW and the Forgotten. In fact, you won't even get the chance to take over Neon Nights again. I'm serious. I'm willing to throw my power around....when an angry blonde isn't screaming in my ear.

Backstage

Hope Mach found Dan sitting at a table sorting out his cards...

Hope Mach: There you are. I should have known.

Bashin Dan: Got to have the perfect deck for a match like I have tonight.

Hope Mach: Alright, so I've been meaning to ask about that. You taught me how to play, but I don't get how sorting your deck helps you in the ring.

Bashin Dan: Mental focus. Reminds me of the challenge in front of me, and what I'm going to have to do to win. I'm never more focused than when I'm sorting my deck and planning my strategy.

Hope Mach: Heh...well alright then.

Bashin Dan: Still don't get it?

Hope Mach: I've learned to just go with the flow with you. You're eccentric, and that's what I...love about you.

Bashin Dan: *blush* I..I love you too.

Hope Mach: I wanted to say I appreciate you being cool with me participating in Miss EBW.

Bashin Dan: It's not my choice to make. That's for you to decide.

Hope Mach: Yeah, but wouldn't you be jealous?

Bashin Dan: Why would I be jealous?

Hope Mach: Do you....do you know what Miss EBW entails?

Bashin Dan: No clue.

Hope Mach: Bikini Contest. In fact, we have to go out there in bikinis immediately.

Bashin Dan: What?! I had no idea! 

Hope Mach: Heh, of course you didn't. Is it still my choice?

Bashin Dan: Well....yeah, it is, but I guess that jealousy you were talking about. I mean, I haven't even seen you in-

Hope Mach: Don't worry about it Dan. I changed my mind.

Bashin Dan: Huh?

Hope Mach: I'm not doing it. I'm the Television Champion. My career is secure for now. Still, wish I had a shot at the World Championship. I'm blocked from that chance. They're not letting me into the Killer Queen Tournament. Plus, Tracy is next up at bat, and-you're a good listener, you know that?

Bashin Dan: It's what I do?

Hope Mach: I-

Suddenly, Cade walked up to Dan's table and smacked his cards right off.

Bashin Dan: What are you doing?!

Cade: What are YOU doing?! I'm stuck with you tonight, but let's make it clear. I WANT TO WIN! I want that Battlebowl Ring! We came back to get what belongs to us, and that ring belongs to me! Put your damn cards away, and get with the picture!

Bashin Dan: I get the picture Cade. I get it all too clearly. You've been trying to play me for a fool, and now you want something from me. I give my all for my friends, and those I care about. You don't want to be a part of that circle, and that's your choice, but I won't stop caring, not after what you did for me and Hope. I don't trust you right now, but I blame whoever this Man in Black is that's gotten into your head!

Cade: So because you don't trust me, you're going into his half assed? That doesn't sound like Bashin Dan. You're too much of an ego maniac.

Bashin Dan: Egoma- *sigh* Cade, I never go in with any less than 100%, because luckily for you, I give my all for myself too

Cade: Then prove it. They keep calling you the would be Ace who drops the ball. Don't drop it tonight until that Battle Royale, when I'll personally toss you over the ropes.

Bashin Dan: We'll see.





Tommy Dukes: Dukes here, and it's Golden Week for EBW! You heard it from the Boss...and Tess, we have a big week of events planned! An entire week of them, leading up to the ENN+ Event "The Golden", which will be a title free for all, with the biggest matches we can offer!

Nerma: And good news! I'm back! Apparently they don't want me upstaging Duvalie or something. Heh. She's not near is she? I bet if she was I wouldn't know until it was too late. I think she was an assassin maid or something.

Makoto Angel: I'm back too! They brought the gang back together for this one. I guess it's all hands on deck. Maybe they don't want me to embarrass Troian again. Hey Nerma, you're not Troian in disguise are you?

Nerma: Absolutely not!

Makoto Angel: That sounds like something Troian would say though.

Nerma: *sigh* Angels.

Makoto Angel: Alright, that sounds closer.

Nerma: I was GOING to show you my newest Mike x Amigo Slash fiction, but-

Makoto Angel: *blush* *nose bleed* Alright! Alright! I believe you!

Tommy Dukes: ...That wife of mine huh? So tonight, we have the Golden Lottery Tags, that will select the participants for Battlebowl! The winner will receive the Battlebowl Ring, which is just one of many accolades one could pick up this week. It's insane!

Nerma: Yes, and we've got Miss EBW to crown. Not really sure how to feel about that.

Makoto Angel: I know some of my family are taking part, so I hope it turns out well.

Nerma: ....You know Tess is hosting it right?

Makoto Angel: ....Let's really REALLY hope!

EBW: Xcite Golden Week 2020
Summers Rex Arena, Summers
ENN

1. Golden Lottery Tag: Grind[o]/Generator beat Rude/Hotlanta[x] via Rolling SSP -> Pin
-Opening match was set as an easy win for the The Legion. Rude was more than happy to step back and let the Legion work over Hotlanta, but they had their work cut out for them. The massive strength of Hotlanta made it toughed going, but Generator and Grind took him to the mat with a Doomsday Device, using a drop kick instead of a lariat, and Grind got the pin after a Rolling SSP.

Tommy Dukes: Well, even though The Legion stacked that one in their favor, I'm still happy to see Grind back in EBW. Seriously dude, you don't have to hack everyone right?

Nerma: Why are you worried about that?

Tommy Dukes: No reason.

Nerma: Uh huh.

Tommy Dukes: You should be worried about all those stories that you-

Nerma: Alright! I get the point!

Tommy Dukes: You can except this Lottery Tag system to be out of control tonight. I doubt many of these teams will be able to work together.

2. Golden Lottery Tag: Dick Wagner/Jammer[o] beat Dirk Laramire/Magnum PT[x] via Slam Jam -> Pin
-Magnum PT's attempts to outshine newcomer Dirk Laramie failed, when he botched a copy of Dirk's finish on Wagner, and ol' Dick tagged in Jammer to lay him flat and hit the Slam Jam off the top.

Tommy Dukes: Called that one! PT wants to outdo Dirk Laramie, but it's just not happening. He's the new hotness. We always need a hairy 80's guy on the roster, and Dirk is just a better model.

Makoto Angel: Yeah, I don't care much for that PT guy.

Tommy Dukes: Because of Tack?

Makoto Angel: No actually. He keeps trying to look up my skirt.

Tommy Dukes: You should tell Tack. I want to see what he does.

3. Golden Lottery Tag: Benjamin/Subculture beat Firebrand X/Jamie XL via DQ
-Jamie XL was more than happy to listen to the advice of a laughing OD on the outside, who suggested he attack his own partner, while OD attacked Subculture and Benji, a DQ win and advancement to the Battlebowl of a mismatched team that didn't get a chance to see what they could do.

Nerma: Naturally, the Hooligans are going to cause problems. It's what they do. Still, I'm surprised they were willing to lose out on a spot in the Battlebowl just to mess with Firebrand.

Tommy Dukes: Maybe OD wants to make sure he wouldn't be facing the feared Firebrand X in that Battle Royale.

Nerma: ....No I just think he's an ass. Oh excuse me. ARSE!

4. Golden Lottery Tag: Tack Angel[o]/Cadmus beat Trevor Mach/Mav Valentine[x] via Torture Rack -> Referee Stoppage
-Trevor Mach made this one short and sweet. After an argument with Mav, he hit him with the knee and tossed him to Tack, who racked him up. The crowd went wild as Mav pleaded for Cadmus to break the hold, but to no avail. The Referee called for the bell as the Star Prince and Dark Star Emperor advance.

Tommy Dukes: Well, so much for our new 4-Crown King nabbing another ring. He was getting tired of Mav's jaw jacking and threw him to the Star Prince. Love that rack Tack! Not...your rack...or Makoto's rack, but-

Nerma: Are you looking at Makoto's rack? How do you not like it? It's huge!

Makoto Angel: *blush* You guys! Please stop!

Tommy Dukes: I meant the torture tack! The torture rack! He should call it the "Torture Tack".

Makoto Angel: That's what he calls Thursdays with Nani.

Tommy Dukes: ...

Makoto Angel: Did I say too much again?

Tommy Dukes: You said too much again. Yes.

5. Golden Lottery Tag: Bashin Dan/Cade beat Kinniku Mike/Maurice via Count Out
-First truly competitive battle of the whole Lottery Tag, as Mike and Maurice put differences aside to battle it out with former friends in Bashin Dan and Cade. The SURGE Generation were dominant for a reason, with power and strikes on their side. Dan had to show heart and wear them down, while Cade was more than happy to slip an eye gouge or low blow onto Mike, but not Maurice. Eventually, the team fell apart, as Mike complained that Maurice was not backing him up. The two threw fists on the outside, and took too long to get back, as they were counted out. Bashin Dan and Cade advanced.

Tommy Dukes: Our boy advances! Bashin Dan, the Challenge Champion, and Cade I guess. I just didn't expect Mike and Maurice to be able to put it together, but they held out longer than I thought.

Nerma: Mike's not just focused on his Strong Tits or Glute Power anymore. He wants revenge.

Tommy Dukes: I noticed YOU were focused on his Strong Tits and Glute Power though.

Nerma: IT'S FOR MY WRITING! You know you're the only one for me with your....flabby...everything....and balding head. You....have a GREAT....sense of humor.

Tommy Dukes: *sigh* Self esteem shattered.

Nerma: BUT I LOVE YOU!

6. Golden Lottery Tag: Swift[o]/w00t beat Jamie OD[x]/Sal Paradise via POUNCE!
-Another competitive battle, with an unexpected reunion of the LoveKick Connection, though against their will. Sal kept Jamie in check as they took on the equally combustible team of Swift and w00t. Swift's injuries seemed to be healing, but w00t was quick to avoid tags or pretend her had something in his eye, leading to confusion. Jamie in turn made this hell for Sal, never wanting to tag out. At one point, Sal had enough, and forced a tag to Jamie, before tossing him into a waiting Swift for the POUNCE and the pin.

After that match, Tess came out with Muscle Girl Security and a mic in hand.

Tess: Alright you hungry simps and thirsty thots, it's time for the Crowning of Miss EBW! I know you've all been waiting for it. It's going to be a lot of fun, and you should ALL be grateful. Now, let's bring out our lovely ladies!

Tess pointed to the stage, as Faris Angel, Christina Angel, Eve, BeShemoth, Tracy Angel, Duvalie, and Women's World Champion Erica all came out in bikinis.

Tess: Alright! I figured we'd just skip to the good part right? Get a load of these ladies. I see that my dau-Tracy is joining us. A lot of Angels out here. Imagine thinking I wanted that, but here you are. Willing to offer up a pound of flesh to advance? Maybe a couple of you aren't as dim as I though. Eve, the newcomer from Hagen. Look at those muscles right? Duvalie, looking modest and beautiful. There she is! Erica, the best of the best! Looking sexy as only Erica Eisen is capable of. Right fellas? This is what you want, so feast your eyes

Tracy Angel: Mom, can we just cut the crap and get this over with! We're out here because you made threats, not because want to be.

Tess: Not a good attitude Tracy, but don't worry. You'll get a chance to make up for that with the next round of the competition.

Faris Angel: Next round? We didn't do anything yet.

Tess: Having the guts to come out dressed like that was Round 1. You ALL pass! Congratulations. Next, I'm going to need to see something from all of you. Call it the "talent" portion if you will. Judging by the cheers from the boys in the crowd, we're going to see who has the BEST talent, and who has the worst.

Duvalie: Talent? You mean like the chest? *blush* Oh goodness, I will have to forfeit, as I don't stand a chance against Mistress Erica. I'm just here to support her crowning.

Tess: Of course you are, and who could blame you. Loyal to a loyal star and champion. You know, I notice Tali isn't out here. Figured she's give it a shot. Too bad for you BeShemoth. I know you wanted a match with her at Killer Queen, but at this point, it's not happening. Let the judging begin!

Using the crowd's cheers, Tess narrowed down the field to Erica, Eve, Tracy Angel, Faris Angel, and Christina Angel.

BeShemoth: What the hell? You're literally just getting rid of me?!

Tess: You didn't have talent? You've got muscle and power, that's true, but we're looking for someone who has BOTH muscle and beauty. I just....I just don't think you have it. Besides, Eve has the muscles and the talent. You're SO replaceable right now....so don't piss me off. Your job is secure, but leave the ring.

BeShemoth: ....

Tess: Looks like a bunch of Angels made it through. I should NOT be surprised. Tack has a type, and it looks like it spread to his daughter too. I bet Tack and Subbie are loving this right Christina?

Christina Angel: I'm not ashamed of my body, and all the women who came out here to play this game aren't either. We're more than that. We're more than your ideas of what women's wrestling should b-

Tess: And you're out! Sorry Christina, but this was going to be the other kind of talent portion of the event, and your promo is putting me to sleep. Get out of here.

Christina Angel: I'm not even upset. You can take that crown and stick it. I just want my chance to compete.

Tess: And you'll get it I guess, but I wouldn't be too happy about that. You Angels are still a thorn in my side, just like Tali really, but she was too cowardly to participate. Alright, so now, we're going to draw from a hat, what I want the rest of you to do. Random talents, we'll see if you even have them. That beats coming up with your own right? Alright Eve, we'll start with you. I want you to *reaches into hat* oh look at that! It's perfect for you! Flex to the crowd! Show them sexy muscle!

Eve posed with a spotlight on her. Sammy the simp, and a bunch of other kissless losers tossed money towards her in the ring.

Tess: You can't argue with those results! Now Faris, I want you to.....*reaches into hat* shave your hair into a mullet.

Faris Angel: What?! That's not a talent! That can NOT be what that says.

Tess: You calling me a liar? Do it or be eliminated! You want to be Miss EBW right?! You're all taking this WAY too seriously. It's for the fun of the fans! Give them what they want!

Faris Angel: ...But a mullet? I-

Tack Angel: NO! NO! Absolutely not! She quits! She's out!

Faris Angel: Tack?

Tack Angel: Please, I'm begging you. Don't shave your hair into a mullet. It might literally kill me.
 
Faris Angel: You're rather I keep my hair than win?

Tack Angel: Some things are more important. In this case, everything is more important than mullets. I know it's your choice but-

Faris Angel: No, if it matters to you that much, I'm forfeiting.

Tess: Played you like a drum Tacky Star Boy. I knew he'd do that. Hehe....still no Tali huh?

Tracy Angel: Why don't you focus on us! I am the #1 Contender, or did you forget? Christina was able to pin M's not too long ago, and you just seemed to forget about that too.

Tess: Oh I remember....I remember, but this isn't your talent Tracy. For you to pass you need to....*reaches into hat* sing my praises and the praises of Erica the Women's World Champion. Wow, that's really fitting I think.

Erica: Perfect even.

Tess: I know right?

Tracy Angel: *sigh*

Tess: You better be good with it too. Any back handed comments and you're out.

Tracy Angel: Mom, you are....*sigh* exceptional...at what you do. The things you're capable of....no normal person could ever do. They couldn't hope to be....what you are. Erica....you'll make a great opponent, when I take the Women's World Championship the night of the Killer Queen Tournament, and I look forward to what we'll do in the ring. It'll certainly be more befitting of us both....then what we're doing now.

Tess: Judges? Oh wait, I'm the judge. That's.....passable...I guess. Alright, Erica all you have to do is....*reaches into hat* ....oh wow..pose with your Women's World Championship, as only you can.

Erica: Oh that's quite easy, and I'll go one step further. I'll gladly accept the challenge Tracy, but let's just hope that nothing gets in the way of your challenge. I'd REALLY hate to see that.

Tess: Look at those posing. She's glamorous right folks? She's amazing she's-

Lady M's: Alright! Enough of this bullshit!

Lady M's stormed down to the ring in a bikini top, and camo shorts.

Tess: Ha! You actually showed up, but the dress choice is lacking and-

Lady M's: Can it! You wanted bikini? You got it! Choke on it! You wanted a big chest! I got it! So choke on THAT! You want a "talent"? I can kick your ass so hard Ness would feel it! You want hair? Here!

Lady M's cut her hair and threw it at Tess.

Lady M's: You want your pound of flesh? Put me in a match with as many women as you feel safe putting in the ring with me, but you'll always come up short. Want to know why? Because I always ALWAYS do what it takes, and I don't half ass it. So I come down here, and I get into this stupid bullshit, because I'm GOING to be in the Killer Queen Tournament, and I'm GOING to win it AGAIN, and I'm GOING to beat the ass of the Champion if it's Tracy or Erica. It doesn't matter, because if it's Tracy, I beat your daughter down, no offense Tracy *wink*, but then when I'm done, I'll STILL go back and take on Erica! So win? Lose? I don't give a shit. This is garbage.

Tess: ....Well...certainly fired up aren't you? Just like with Captain Sparkle, you have to come out and do what I say. I love it. Well, you're certainly IN the competition, but I wonder who is going to win? Ladies and gentlemen....the first ever Miss EBW is.....TRACY ANGEL!

Tracy Angel: What?!

Lady M's: What?!

Tess: That's right! It's your Tracy! Here's your crown, and scepter. Here she is....Miss EBW!

Tracy Angel: What is your game here?

Tess: What? No game, you win! I feel you "really had it coming to you".

Erica: Congratulations Tracy, it's a real shame about our match though.

Tracy Angel: Huh? What do you mean?

Tess: Well you're Miss EBW now. You're our ambassador, and you'll have your hands SO full with those duties we've got lined up for you, that you won't be able to challenge for the Women's World Championship for a loooong time!

Tracy Angel: Well then I refuse!

Tess: I'm afraid you can't Tracy. You signed on the dotted line. You don't get to do what you want anymore. You get to do what's best for the greater good. It's quite the honor, and you know what....you should....BE....GRATEFUL!

Erica: Darn! Such a shame I lost huh? Only time I'll ever lose to you though. Haha!

Eve: That would have been quite a match I'm sure.

Tracy Angel: M's, help me out here!

Lady M's: ...I'm damn glad you were higher on her shit list this week. That's all I'm saying. Tess, you stick that crown up your ass! Erica, I'll be seeing you soon, and you can count on it!

Tracy Angel: ....DAMMIT!

7. Crowning of Miss EBW: Tracy Angel
8. Battlebowl Battle Royale: Grind vs. Generator vs. Dick Wagner vs. Jammer vs. Benjamin vs. Subculture vs. Tack Angel vs. Cadmus vs. Bashin Dan vs. Cade vs. Swift vs. w00t
Winner:

Bashin Dan

EBW World

Nerma: Nerma here! Hello wrestling fans, it's time for another edition of EBW World! Big stories to talk about today, with some changes happening based on the success of Return of the CXJ. We'll also hear some big news regarding the Presidency of EBW! Yes, something....odd...is going on there. That's the best way to explain it I would think. We start off with a little backstage footage. On Xcite we had the Battlebowl, and in the process of getting to that, we had the Golden Tag Lottery. Thanks to The Legion's hacking, teams like 4-Crown King Trevor Mach and Mav Valentine were created. Mach didn't take to the jaw jacking of his former protege, and threw him to the lions as it were. After the match, we got THIS footage....yes..THIS footage. Play it Steve. PLAY IT!

Summers Rex Arena - Backstage

Trevor Mach walked himself back to the back with a smile on his face, as Mav Valentine rushed up behind him, spun him around, and pushed him back.

Trevor Mach: Whoa! Watch it Mav!

Mav Valentine: You son of a bitch! Why would you do that?!

Trevor Mach: Not obvious enough? Call it payback for Winters then. You left me to die.

Mav Valentine: Because you left me to di-

Trevor Mach: I did not such thing you little shit! I'm tired of you putting that on me! I was already gone when that happened, and I couldn't save you, because you didn't die! You weren't dead Mav. Wherever you ended up, he found you, and brought you here, telling you that you died, but you didn't. That means he has no real power over you, and yet you follow him anyway. He's got you wrapped around his finger.

Mav Valentine: No one has control of me. I do what I choose. I'm not a puppet, and I'm not a slave, and I won't be in your shadow or his.

Trevor Mach: Who is he anyways? You've seen his face under that hat and coat. It's obvious he wants to hide it. So who is he?

Mav Valentine: No chance I'm telling you, and no chance I'm ever being put into this position again by you. I mean it. I am SICK to DEATH of the way things work around here. I was willing to learn from you. I crashed on your couch, I carried your bags. I was willing to learn. A kid with my ego and ambition, that was very difficult, but I found myself enjoying the company over time. I liked being a part of a family. I guess that was all just bullshit. You used me, and discarded me.

Trevor Mach: No, that's not it at all. I was looking for someone to work with because....I didn't think I'd ever see Justice again. I missed my son. You reminded me of myself, but I didn't want to create you in my image. I didn't want to create anything for that matter. I wanted you to get fed up and break out on your own. I just....I did not want it to be like this, with him. You have no idea what he wants to do.

Mav Valentine: He's helping us even the playing field. Now look at me. I'm the Television Champion. This title you used to carry around so much. The one you said meant something, until you found yourself as World Champion again. Then suddenly, it doesn't mean shit right? I don't want it anymore. I want what you've got. I want the Triple Crown.

Trevor Mach: Yeah? Well, I'll make it real simple for you kid. Win The Golden Tournament, and I'll see you at the end of the week?

Mav Valentine: I will win, and don't call me kid. Don't ever call me kid again.

Trevor Mach: Wow, right in my face huh? You know what keeps guys like me at the top around here? We face our fears. You're doing that right now, and you don't even need him or any of the Forgotten behind you. You could be your own man and-

Mav Valentine: Save it. I'll see you soon.

Trevor Mach: *sigh*

-

Nerma: So yeah, that happened. Not sure about half of what they were talking about, but it sounded personal. Trevor with those #Dadvibes. He's looking younger these days, but he's still 37, and I secretly have a thing for Daddies....but I guess that's not so secret anymore. Damn, what is with the truth just slipping out these days. I'm a professional dammit! We move on from that to get to this. The Television Championship has now been VACATED! Yes, that's right, the price to get into The Golden Tournament for Champions, is to set aside your current championships. Apparently Mav tossed it onto the desk and stormed out, simple as that. Anyways, the title will find a new Champion at The Golden, when it is hoisted up for a Ladder Match between four challengers. Those challengers are Subculture, Kiva, Grind, and Bashin Dan, the Challenge Champion. He didn't want to sacrifice his Challenge Championship for The Golden Tournament, and the Battlebowl Winner is not just looking to add another belt to his collection. He's got a specific goal.

-

Bashin Dan: I want to seal the Television Championship. The title has prestige and history, but is it really serving its intended purpose? I look at my Challenge Championship as the true successor. The true title to meet the demands of a "Television Championship". You compete every week, and the winner's purse gets bigger as you go. There's the real challenge. There's the real incentive. That's what I believe. That's what I'm going to do.

-

Nerma: Of course, he's not the only one with plans, because got this from Grind.

-

Grind: Check it boys and girls, cause it's real simple. The Legion are on a Gold Rush. We'll take what we can get, but we're taking something. He or She who has the gold makes the rules right? That's what's going on with the Women's Division. Kyoko the Love Shocker can barely break in, when you got the Eisenritter controlling everything. So I'm thinking we liberate the Television Championship, and we make it a title for us outcasts, looking for a way back in. That purpose enough for you Danny boy?

-

Nerma: And of course Kiva had "something" to say, but it was in Lucha. Subculture has been hungry for title success for some time. Coming off of injuries and time spent with his wife, this could be just what it takes to get the fire back into the Green Bomber. Now onto, something a little different. The EBW Owner Noah Jennings, is looking to assign a President to his company. Apparently, he doesn't want to have to deal with Tess? I can't say I blame him.

Jennings Office

Noah Jennings: Today, I hereby declare that the position of EBW President needs to be filled. I'm the owner. I'm the money man. I'm good at business, and I'm good at presenting EBW as the leader of the sport. I'm THAT great. However, not even I can do both at once. It's worked this way in the past, with me working for a predecessor named Wozniak that no one seems to remember existing. However, unlike that situation, this President will have my full support, and he won't be someone that can just be fired. No, they will be elected in by their wrestling peers, and they will have powers that put mine in check. In short, we will both work together to ensure a better future for EBW. Now, who will step up for this job?

Suddenly, w00t stepped into the office.

Noah Jennings: w00t? What the hell? Aren't you with the Forgotten?

w00t: That is true, I am a member of the Forgotten, where we believe it's time to take the power back. Plus, I've been in your shoes before too. I have the experience. If they all elect me, I'll level the playing field once and for all, just like how our Boss wants.

Noah Jennings: That's far too suspicious to actually win you anything, so be my guest. Who else do we ha-

?: That would be.

Noah Jennings: Huh?

Orange walked into the room, but he looked quite different. He was wearing a suit, with his orange bowl cut hair, combed back in an awkward way.

Noah Jennings: Orange?

Orange: That's Orange MAN thank you very much. Yes, I am going to be your President. I'm the best for the job, very much so. I realized wrestling, that my brain power is what EBW needs, and not my already impressive muscles. Look at them, they're the best, very good, very ripped, and very orange.

w00t: Oh, you can no be serious here. You actually think you stand a chance?

Orange Man: I'm going to win w00t, because I'm the best.

w00t: What kind of platform is that?

Orange Man: I'm going to "Make EBW Great Again".

w00t: What?!

Noah Jennings: It's...uh...it's already great?

Orange Man: Like I said, I'm going to "Keep EBW Great" #OrangeMan2020.

w00t: Grrrr! Orange Man bad!

Noah Jennings: What? You losing words there?

Orange Man: This was bound to happen, when I showed off what a great President I can be. I call it Orange Derangement Syndrome. Very sad, many such cases.

Noah Jennings: Uh....is it too late to take back my decree? Anyone else want to run for President? Anyone? Please?!

Summers Beach

The the Angel wives sans Iroha, were splashing around in the water, and having a good time. Even Eris seemed to be in on it. Tack stared at them, unblinking as a beach ball hit his face, and he still was unresponsive.

Subculture: Dude, that smacked you right in the face? You alright?

Kinniku Mike: To be fair, I was aiming for him. He looks dead.

Tack Angel: The ladies...my collection...is close to being complete.

Subculture: Eh?

Tack Angel: I need one more, to complete the set.

Kinniku Mike: The hell are you talking about man? You already have 7 wives. Take it from a guy that's been divorced a bunch of times. This is going to blow up in your face eventually.

Tack Angel: Just one more....for perfect symmetry.

Subculture: Why do you need one more?

Tack Angel: I put their pictures on my phone's home screen. See that corner? A missing space. I must fill it.

Subculture: You could....you know...NOT do that. Instead of trying someone down to marriage you could....re-edit the pictures?

Tack Angel: No...this is the only way.

Kinniku Mike: Yeah bro, but is it though? Is it really?

Tack Angel: It must be....and it be could her.

Kinniku Mike: Huh?

Tack pointed to a stacked brunette in a bikini walking by on the beach.

Subculture: You're just picking her cause of tits.

Kinniku Mike: I can't blame you there. She's got. Uuuuuu.

Tack Angel: Yes.....uuuuuuuu. I must approach her.

Tack got up and walked over to the woman. Subculture and Mike stood back and stared.

Subculture: ...I just think you can't leave Tack out in the sun too long or shit like this happens.

Kinniku Mike: Yeah probably.

Tack could be seen talking to the woman, flailing his arms, and making a case for something. Suddenly, the woman started slapping him repeatedly, and chased him off.

Subculture: Didn't go well huh?

Tack Angel: ...a slight miscalculation. We'll get back to this...when it's not so hot out.

Subculture: Yeah, go inside you weirdo.

Kinniku Mike: It's like you care or something?

Subculture: Who me? No, I don't give a shit. His daughter seems to care about his crazy ass though, and I do care about her. That's the dilemma.

Kinniku Mike: Yeah. So....what does Christina look like naked?

Subculture: ...Why am I even hanging out with you?

Last edited by Machismo (4/29/2020 2:56 am)

Jennings Office

Noah Jennings: Welcome everyone, to The Golden Tournament. I'm EBW Owner Noah Jennings, here with tonight's host and guest commentator. The first ever Miss EBW, Tracy Angel!

Tracy Angel: ....I'm *sigh* happy to be here.

Noah Jennings: That's a real nice sash they gave you.

Tracy Angel: I hate it.

Noah Jennings: Well, alright then. We'll be seeing you down at ringside along with Tommy Dukes and the 4-Crown King Trevor Mach. Tonight, we're going to see who will be facing Trevor at The Golden, our big event on ENN+! We kick of tonight's show with a 4-Way match for the EBW Television Championship. A lot of guys have a lot of plans with that belt, so we'll see what happens. *sigh* Now, we have the two candidates for EBW President in w00t and "Orange Man" here with me. What do you two think about tonight's show?

Orange Man: Love it. Terrific. Wonderful stuff. It's the best. We have the best wrestlers. The best fans. We're keeping EBW great.

w00t: You done? Why are you talking like that? Unlike this guy, I want to be a President of action, so when you elect me, the genius that I am, I'll be continuing in ring as the Triple Crown World Champion. I'm just that good, and no one else can match up.

Noah Jennings: There's that w00t ego I've been missing. You've been more subservient lately. Why is that?

w00t: Huh? Well...you know...I don't even remember anymore to be honest. It's fading, and it's fading fast. All I know is that I-

The screen cut to black, and the Man in Black stepped out of the darkness, speaking with voice modulation.

The Man in Black: Former Forgotten, you have bought the time I needed, and completed your mission successfully. Each of you is remembered. Each of you matters again, which I promised you. Never let it be said that you can't make a deal with me and not get what you wanted. But, as of right now, you are released from our pact. You are Forgotten no more.

The screen cut back to Noah and w00t.

w00t: Uh...yeah...that explains it. Ha! Free to do what I want baby, and taking back EBW is exactly what I'm going to do! Vote for me!

Noah Jennings: Huh....did we....did we win the war? Was it a war? I'm feeling not like it was a distraction? Why Steve? Well because he basically said so!

EBW: Golden Week - The Golden Tournament

Tommy Dukes: Incredible! For those of you just joining us, the mysterious Man in Black, the figure head that rounded up the "Forgotten" wrestlers of EBW, has just released the talent, back into the wild as it were. I guess that means the Forgotten are no more. What do you think Trevor?

Trevor Mach: Uh....this...this is not good. This is not good at all. I have to go.

Tommy Dukes: What? Where are you going?

Trevor Mach: I wasn't expecting him to find him so quickly. I really....I really just have to go.

Tommy Dukes: Huh...and there goes our 4-Crown King ladies and gentlemen. Well, this certainly throws a curve ball into the proceedings tonight. It was going to be all about The Golden Tournament, but this is a major plot development. Let's take it to the back, and see how some of the talent is reacting.

Backstage

Gold, Lainey Strong, Kimber Blaze, and Lt. Lacy Wagner were seen immediately running up to Sylvie, Lainey Strong, and "3G" Krissy Gale.

Gold: I believe you just heard the announcement yes?

Lainey Strong: It's over Jane. We don't have to fight anymore.

Kimber Blaze: Yeah, ya weirdos. Let's stop fighting and work together again.

Lt. Lacy Wagner: I'm with her, but basically without calling you weirdos.

Sylvie: You think it's over? You still don't remember, and it's...it's fading from me too all of a sudden, but I won't allow myself to forget.

Calamity Jane: ...I....I don't know what I was thinking. Sylvie, you can hang onto your hate, but my mind is clear now. I don't know what came over me. Of course Lainey, I'm so sorry. We're a team!

Krissy Gale: I just.... I need to think about this for awhile. I need to go.

Gold: Sylvie please. Whatever happened, I want to help you get over it.

Sylvie: I'm not yours to mold anymore. I don't know why I ever let myself think we could be friends. If these ladies don't want to work together anymore, then I know exactly where I can do.

Gold: No. Don't go to Tess Sylvie. Don't sell your soul! Please!

-

Tommy Dukes: Wow, this is immediately having a consequence in the back. Is this cause to celebrate?

Tack Angel: I wouldn't just yet.

Tommy Dukes: Ah!

Tack Angel: Ah!

Tracy Angel: Tack! What are you doing here?

Tack Angel: I wanted to stand by my wife. They tricked you, and I don't appreciate that. It's the least I could do, to come out here, stand with you, and call this show.

Tommy Dukes: You were too late to sign up for the tournament weren't you?

Tack Angel: ....Those guys are fast alright?

Tommy Dukes: How do you feel about this? The Home Army must be relieved.

Tack Angel: No, I don't think so. This makes them all more dangerous. Some might be looking for a fresh start after this, but some are going to be more dangerous. I'm lucky I have Eris to protect me, because Cadmus and Bellerophon have been at my throat, and that could only ramp up now. It's like letting a bunch of rabid dogs off the leash.

Tommy Dukes: But at least we have the Elite 4 to protect u-

Tack Angel: We're not legally allowed to call ourselves that. Remember, we disbanded because of a stipulation?

Tommy Dukes: I'm surprised you remember that.

Tack Angel: Tracy just wrote it down on a piece of paper for me. Thank you Tracy.

Tommy Dukes: Seriously dude....less hits to the head. Well, we'll see how this plays out going forward. Wait, we've got some more backstage stuff. Let's go!

Backstage

The Man in Black had just drove away, as Mav Valentine ran after him angrily.

Mav Valentine: You son of a bitch! You're leaving now?!

Maurice: Heh. Don't worry about it. We're free to do what we please now. If Mike and Amigo think this changes anything, they've got another thing coming.

Mav Valentine: Fine! I'll do what I've got to do by myself!

Trevor Mach walked by them, with bat in hand, as he hopped onto his motorcycle.

Mav Valentine: Don't just ignore me! Where the hell are YOU going?

Trevor Mach: Doesn't concern you anymore Mav. Stay out of it.

Mav Valentine: I will. I WILL! I've got my own shit to deal with you know?! I've got a career to correct! I'm going to show everyone that I matter, not just that, but that I'm MORE than worthy of those belts you carry! I'm going to get another shot. I'm coming for you Trevor! DO YOU HEAR ME!?

EBW: Golden Week - The Golden Tournament
Summers Rex Arena, Summers
ENN

1. EBW Television Championship: Subculture beat Mav Valentine(c), Bashin Dan, and Kiva[x] via KO Punch -> Pin -> NEW EBW Television Champion!
-The opening match saw Mav Valentine take on Challenge Champion Bashin Dan, Kiva, and Team Champion Subculture, in a 4-Way for the Television Championship. An all over the place brawl, with many clashing styles. Mav and Kiva were quick to turn on each other, with the Forgotten suddenly disbanded, giving Subculture the chance to knock out the high flier with a KO Punch for a surprise roll up and the win.

Tommy Dukes: Whoa! Subculture, is the NEW Television Champion! I wasn't expecting that! Mav wanted to take the title and combine it with the Triple Crown. Dan wanted it sealed. Kiva wanted something in Lucha, but only Subculture seemed to really covet the title, and now he's got it. With that and the ring, we're finally seeing the return of the Street Dog here.

Tack Angel: *sigh* I mean....I guess that's good...I'm sure Christina will be happy about it, but I'm going to have to hear about it all the time, and I just don't feel like it. You know? Like....why Subculture?

Tracy Angel: Oh come on Tack. I know you don't like the guy, but this IS great news. You love the Television Championship. You wanted it to stick around.

Tack Angel: Right...and NOW....I can challenge for it at some point. As Trevor would say, "something to think about".

Tracy Angel: I didn't mean it like that!

Tack Angel: Too late!

Tracy Angel: Oh no.

2. EBW The Golden Tournament Quarter-Finals: Firebrand X beat Cade via Crash Thunder Buster -> Pin
-The tournament kicked off with a match between Firebrand X and Cade. Cade looked more distraught that the Forgotten had suddenly broken up, and that lost feeling, carried into the match, where he lacked the intensity to keep Firebrand down. The masked man took Cade to the mat with a Crash Thunder Buster, and pinned him to advance.

Tommy Dukes: Another win for the Elit-

Tack Angel: Hey! What did I say! We're not called that anymore! We're just a bunch of dudes....who are bad...in the 90's sense.

Tracy Angel: Just say Bad Dudes. You know you want to say Bad Dudes.

Tack Angel: Well I'm a Bad Dudes, and Trevor's a Bad Dudes. I don't know about the other two. Possible Firebrand, like I wouldn't tell him no, but I don't know about that Subbie fella.

Tracy Angel: Oh come on!

Backstage

Mav Valentines was throwing around stage equipment and lighting, He noticed the Lakitu filming and approached, grabbing the camera.

Mav Valentine: Oh, I'm not supposed to do this!? I'm not supposed to touch you?! Fine me! I don't care! This is bullshit! What do I have to do to make my statement?! What do I have to do to get over!? What do I have to do to get to the top! I made a deal with Death, and even Death abandons the mission! I was left to die, and now I'm being left to rot?! NO! I'm going to turn it around! I'm not a puppet! I'm not a protege! I'm not something you can define, and put in a box, and I refuse to be told where my place is on the card! I'm coming for that #1 spot! GAAAH! DAMMIT!

3. EBW The Golden Tournament Quarter-Finals: w00t beat Rude via wKo -> Pin
-The Legion rolled out with Rude, as he took on w00t, who was handing out "Vote for w00t" t-shirts and pennants. Somewhere, Arliss Michaels was seeing dollars signs. The Legion crew somehow hacked the music and lighting, as music played over neon strobe effects, trying to take w00t out of the match. Rude never looked better, as he took down the former 4-Crown King, after several chops and a Rulebreaker, but only got the 2 Count. Rude was looking to set him up again, but wKo out of nowhere, lead to the pin and win for w00t, who again started telling fans to vote for him.

Tommy Dukes: w00t is taking the whole disbanding of the Forgotten in stride.

Tack Angel: Like I said, they're going to be more dangerous than ever. They're going off into different directions now, and-

Tommy Dukes: Here comes Swift! The Brawler is chasing after w00t through the crowd!

Tack Angel: Oh hey buddy! Swift! Oh well, I'll catch him later.

Tommy Dukes: Well, he's coming back right now, cause he's next up to bat as it were. He chased off w00t though, so-

Tack Angel: No he didn't! Look out Swift!

Tommy Dukes: w00t must have grabbed a wrench or something, cause he just bashed something into the back of Swift's head. He's bleeding profusely. Big damage done from one former 4-Crown King to the other. A lot of history there. Swift is being checked on by the referee. Is he actually going to try and compete? 

Tack Angel: You can't keep Swift down. He's a beast! My money is on Swift despite the injury!

Tommy Dukes: I'll take that bet.

Tracy Angel: Really?

Tommy Dukes: Yeah Tracy, look at him. He's leaving a trail of blood on the way to the ring. Can someone get a mop? Maybe some disinfectant too?

4. EBW The Golden Tournament Quarter-Finals: Mav Valentine beat Swift via Referee Stoppage
-A disgruntled Mav Valentine looked to recover from his loss at the beginning of the show, and took advantage of w00t's attack, targeting the gash on the back of Swift's head and keeping it open. Swift tried to counter back, using his energy to hit a POUNCE, but wobbly legs kept him from hitting the Blackhammer, and Mav escaped, trapping Swift in a chokehold before bringing him to the mat. Swift passed out from blood loss, and the ref had no choice but to end the match.

Tommy Dukes: Shock of shocks! Mav Valentine just beat Swift! He just stopped the man who is a MULTIPLE TIME 4-Crown King, albeit, with a little help from the would be President.

Tack Angel: *sigh* Alright, you won the bet.

Tommy Dukes: That's right, pay up. What's this? "Angel Dollars"?

Tack Angel: Spend those at the Crystal Heaven Food Court.

5. EBW The Golden Tournament Quarter-Finals: Kinniku Mike beat Maurice via Muscle Buster -> Pin
-A highly athletic grudge match, as Amigo in a neck brace came down to second Kinniku Mike. They started off in a lock up, exchanging leverage, with Mike trying to hit that all important first slam, but Maurice backed away and slapped him in the face, changing the tone of the match, with Maurice using his reach advantage to try and keep Mike at a distance. However, Amigo uncharacteristically tripped up Maurice, leading to a big crowd reaction, as Mike used that moment to hit the Dragon Suplex. He followed it up with a Muscle Buster, carrying Maurice around the ring, before dropping him hard for the pin.

Tommy Dukes: Whoa! Amigo, helping out Mike. I'd call that payback for sure. Maurice didn't have any back up here. The effects of this Forgotten disbanding, already being felt. Maurice looks livid.

Tracy Angel: He got what he deserved. He tried to take Amigo out of action permanently. I don't care for Maurice.

Tack Angel: Wife, it's everyone's job to care.

Tracy Angel: ....

Tack Angel: ....No you're right. He sucks. Tracy, your dress is uh....

Tracy Angel: What? I hate dresses. Am I showing off too much cleavage?

Tack Angel: Um....not enough actually. Could you pull it down just a bit?

Tommy Dukes: Yeah, you should do that.

6. EBW The Golden Tournament Semi-Finals: Firebrand X beat w00t via Fireslide -> Pin
-A solid match with w00t having to work hard against Firebrand, with no one to back him up. A wKo took Firebrand to the mat, but he somehow managed to kick out at 2. The fans started to boo and throw the "Vote for w00t" merch back at him. He argued with the crowd, but X, the hybrid fighter, switched things up and pulled him into a Triangle Choke, with a panicking w00t barely making it to the ropes. He circled the ring and clutched at his throat, only for Firebrand to kip up and land a kick to the midsection followed by the Fireslide for the pin.

Tommy Dukes: Yeah! Firebrand X advances to the Finals. That's what I'm talking about! More victories for the Bad Dudes!

Tack Angel: No seriously, that's like a Tag Team thing with me and Trevor. You can't just include them into it. I mean why do you keep bringing this up?

Tommy Dukes: No reason. By the way, I'd like to take this opportunity to inform everyone that EBW: The Golden, later this week, will be brought to you by the Bad Dudes Trilogy Blu-Ray Box Set. Remastered Director's Cuts of the thrilling adventures of Tack Striker and Trevor Blade. I also hear a Bad Dudes IV might be in Pre-Production?

Tracy Angel: Oooooh! Marketing. Tack, it's a marketing thing.

7. EBW The Golden Tournament Semi-Finals: Mav Valentine beat Kinniku Mike via Mav Buster x Curb Stomp -> Pin
-High impact action between Mav Valentine and Kinniku Mike was up next. A livid and defiant Mav Valentine refused to be seen as beneath Mike, and disrespected him in the ring. It was like watching a new Mav Valentine emerge over the course of the show. Mav escaped the Dragon Suplex attempt, and tried to go for the Mav Buster, but Mike conversely counter and hit a Belly to Belly for the nearfall. Maurice ran down to ring side, and attacked Amigo, sending him head and neck first into the guard rail. The distraction helped Mav hit the Mav Buster on Mike, followed by a disrespectful Curb Stomp and the pin.

Tack Angel: No! I hope Amigo's alright. I need to-

Tracy Angel: TACK!

Tommy Dukes: Oh no, we've got Cadmus attacking! He just came after Tack through the crowd! I guess all bets are off now. Tracy get back!

Tracy Angel: Like hell I am!

Tommy Dukes: Miss EBW is trying to help Tack, but Bellerophon just clobbered her. Here comes Makoto, Nani, and Christina to help out. They're running them off while helping up Tack and Tracy. This is just an out of control night people. It's crazy! Mav Valentine is in the ring taunting Firebrand X. He's ready. It's time to crown this year's winner of The Golden Tournament. Guess I'm calling this solo. Reminds me of college....forget I said that.

8. EBW The Golden Tournament Finals:

Mav Valentine beat Firebrand X via Mav Buster x Curb Stomp -> Pin -> The Golden!

EBW World

Nerma: Time for another EBW World update! Golden Week is progressing nicely. We just saw Mav Valentine become "The Golden" and now we know that he'll be facing 4-Crown Trevor Mach for the Triple Crown World Championship. We'll find out later in the week who will be facing Erica, with the Killer Queen Tournament that's still to come. Speaking of the Killer Queen Tournament. It turns out that Lady M's is going to have to qualify to get into it. I know shock of shocks right. We don't know why she's facing yet, but it'll be the main event of our Xperience for Golden Week. We'll also see intergender action, as Tack Angel teams with wife Tracy Angel to take on Cadmus and Bellerophon. Bashin Dan will have a challenger for the Challenge Championship, Dirk Laramire will be in action against Kinniku Mike, and six of our high fliers will be competing in the opener, for the right to challenge for the Neon Championship. Yes, thanks to the success of the CXJ reunion, the Neon Championship looks to be replacing the title, as the prize for the top ropes enthusiasts. We have The Legion representing on this one, so they may find a title show coming later in the week. Speaking of The Legion, they have been mum on the dissolution of The Forgotten. Message board posts seem to indicate that they still believe themselves as the third party, but now it seems between the "Heel-Face Dynamic". So tweener then. Tweener right? That's what they call that? Tweener? Tweener Steve? Am I right? Yeah, I'm right. They're tweeners. Look forward to all of this, PLUS a sit down interview with 4-Crown King Trevor Mach and Mav Valentine on Xperience, Golden Week edition!

EBW: Golden Week - Xperience
Summers Rex Arena, Summers
ENN

1. EBW Neon #1 Contender: Los Tiburon vs. Grind vs. Kiva vs. Generator vs. El Mago vs. Hex No Limit       
2. Singles: Kinniku Mike vs. Dirk Laramie
3. EBW Challenge Championship: Bashin Dan vs. TBA
4. Intergender Tag: Tack Angel/Tracy Angel vs. Cadmus/Bellerophon
5. Killer Queen Qualifier: Lady M's vs. TBA

The Legion Feed

The camera cut to a neon painted hang out, where a masked man with goggles and headphones looked to the camera.

?: Welcome to The Legion feed. Nerma hit the nail of the head, we're the space between heel and face. We're free spirits, and we do our own thing. Like for example, hacking the cameras some more, to show everyone what's going on in EBW. Freedom of information, am I right?

Summers Beach Basketball Court

Jammer was taking shots to the hoop, with very little success. The kids all around him were sinking shots, much better than he was.

Jammer: Uh....that's right. I wanted to make you feel better, to boost your confidence. I was only pretending to suck. Haha. I'm....I'm going to go. Keep at it kids. Just....just keep at it. *sigh*

The distraught Jammer walked the boardwalk, feeling listless and unhappy, then he saw someone familiar sitting at a nearby outdoor cafe.

Jackson Kain: *on the phone* You tell them, that if they want me in Bad Dudes IV, they've got me. I haven't gotten to play a villain in an action film before. That script and contract better look good though. I'm not kidding.  Count the zeros Goldstein. You know what I want. Alright. Later.

Jammer: Jackson Kain, former EBW star and action movie icon.

Jackson Kain: You want an autograph? Cause I don't have a pen, and- oh, it's the Slam Master. EBW IS in town after all. Guess I should have expected a run in or two. It's a like wrestler second nature.

Jammer: It's just Jammer now. No Slam Master. I'm not really the master of anything.

Jackson Kain: You seem upset. You're not going to talk to me about it are you?

Jammer: No.

Jackson Kain: Oh good.

Jammer: ....It's just that-

Jackson Kain: Oh here we go.

Jammer: I have never been less important in EBW. I'm a member of Dan Club, but lately we haven't been going after anything. Friendship is important, I learned that lesson, but friendship alone is not getting me any close to getting back to the title picture.

Jackson Kain: Uh-huh.

Jammer: Dan is the man, and everyone loves him. He earned that. I can't fault him, and I'm not bitter about it anymore. I do still have that ting of jealousy. I want so badly to reach that place, but after what I did to get my World Championship, I don't know if I ever will.

Jackson Kain: You were World Champion? Oh that's right! You we- sorry....I don't get to watch the product that much.

Jammer: Guess I'm just in a rut.

Jackson Kain: This sounds familiar actually. You know what it is. Secondary Rider Syndrome.

Jammer: What?

Jackson Kain: You're the cool, dark, and brooding secondary rider. You're not the protagonist. That's the part that hurts the most, when you realize you're not the protagonist. I play heroes in a lot of movies, but when it came to EBW, I was secondary to Degrees. Doc was always seen as the hero, the leader, and that bothered me. Then, it hit me.

Jammer: What hit you?

Jackson Kain: A dropkick he landed right to my dome. In my unconscious state, I realized that we're actually really lucky. We are the cool guys. We're the renegades. People on message boards will talk about how we're cooler than the protagonist and deserve the push. You get quite a loyal fan base being the secondary rider. We're always just much more interesting. We're full of sub-text. Sub-text Jammer. All of that sub-text.

Jammer: That all sounds good, but I've been down the renegade route before, it turned me into a dick.

Jackson Kain: You know how many women secretly or not so secretly love the bad boy? I mean, #chokemedaddy trends on twitter if that's any indication. A lot of broken girls with daddy issues, get obsessed with the secondary rider.

Jammer: ....Kaori didn't.

Jackson Kain: ....*sniff*...that was a low blow Jam.

Jammer: Sorry.

Jackson Kain: No, don't be. It was perfect. Embrace being what you are.

Jammer: I don't want to turn my back on my friends again.

Jackson Kain: Who says you have to? Instead of you changing for them, they can accept you for who you are. I mean, I'm still BEST FRIENDS with Doc, and...uh...Jeff? John? John Donuts? I want to say his name is John Donuts. I feel pretty confident about that.

Jammer: You're right Jackson....you're absolutely right!

Jammer grabbed out a pen, signed his basketball, and slammed it onto the table.

Jackson Kain: What's this?

Jammer: MY autograph.

Jackson Kain: Hey hey, now THAT'S the spirit. But seriously, could you take it off the table. I'm still eating.

Jammer: Right. Right. Sorry.

One Eyed Jack's

Tack Angel was sitting at a table by himself, slowly drinking a glass of grape juice. Vape and Benjamin were sitting a ways away, observing.

Vape: Why do you think he looks so down in the dumps?

Benjamin: I don't know. If I were that guy, I'd be happy all the time. A kingdom, wives, pirates, penguins, giant robots, and he's a popular guy.

Vape: I want just one of those things. I could take care of a penguin. Maybe I'll get one. How much do they cost?

Benjamin: It's too hot here Vape.

Vape: Oh right...can you buy pirates?

Benjamin: What would you do with one?

Vape: ....Buy a pirate girl and have her love me.

Benjamin: Oh man....Vape....man.

Vape: I know....I know. Hey, who is that coming in? That's Tack's brother in law Stuart right?

Benjamin: Yeah it is. Why is covered in bandages?

Vape: Hey Stu! You alright man?

Stuart: Huh? Oh, you guys are in that Dan Club right. Yeah, I'm fine. Thank you for the concern.

Benjamin: You're covered in bandages. What happened?

Stuart: Oh, you know how it is. Tack's got this group of guys trying to get the drop on him, and I'm trying to do my part by keeping them out of his business.

Vape: Wow, that's awful nice of you.

Stuart: Least I could do. If you'll excuse me, I really need a drink.

Vape: He seems nice.

Benjamin: We didn't ask him what had Tack down.

Vape: You're right, we could have done that. Man, we're terrible detectives.

Benjamin: Detectives? You think we're detectives?

Vape: ....Are we not?

Benjamin: Are we?

Vape: I had all those cards printed up. See?

Benjamin Vape: "Mystic Vape Detective Agency"?

Vape: Yeah booooy!

Benjamin: Huh, always full of surprises you are.

Vape: Thanks. I try. Now wait, here comes Eris Angel. Let's ask her this time....like the REAL detectives we are.

Benjamin: Right. Excuse us? Mam?

Eris Angel: WHAT?!

Vape and Benjamin: AH!

Eris Angel: Oh...sorry about that. A little busy trying to keep Tack's ass out of the fire! Didn't mean to snap at you Benji.

Benjamin: Benji? Do we know each other?

Eris Angel: Oh, of course you wouldn't remember me. When you died, you asked to be taken somewhere different from your world, and I put you here. It was so long ago though, it's easy to forget.

Benjamin: I DIED?!

Eris Angel: ...Just forget I said all of that.

Benjamin: ...That actually explains a few things tho-

Eris Angel: I SAID FORGET IT!

Benjamin: FORGOTTEN!

Vape: Excuse us Mam, but we're detectives, and we've got to ask-

Eris Angel: The best way to lose weight? Diet and exercise, same as always. Seriously Vape, you've got like 2 years left buddy. Your heart's going to explode.

Vape: ...Ominous. Diet Coke it is then. But, back to what I was GOING to ask. Do you know what seems to be wrong with Tack?

Eris Angel: That asshole?! Ha! After nabbing wife number SEVEN! SEVEN! SEVEN WIVES! That man has the GALL to ask the wives if he can add an 8th because, and I quote, he wants to "fill the empty space on his phone home screen". Can you believe that shit!? Especially when his seventh wife is me, and just look at me!

Vape: Oh I am.

Eris Angel: I mean, he can't touch me, but he gets to look at me! That should be enough. Gah! What a maroon! I can't keep guarding this man by myself you know!

Vape: ...Huh...is Tack really that sad about not getting an 8th wife? How sad can you get about something like that?




Tack Angel: ♫ baka mitai kodomo na no ne
yume wo otte kizu tsuite
uso ga heta na kuse ni
waraenai egao misetaI LOVE YOU mo roku ni iwanai
kuchibeta de honma ni bukiyou
na no ni na no ni doushite
sayonara wa ieta nodame da ne
dame yo dame na no yo
anta ga suki de suki sugite
dore dake tsuyoi osake de mo
yugamanai omoide ga
baka mitai ♫

Benjamin: Apparently pretty sad.

Last edited by Machismo (5/07/2020 2:23 am)

Crystal Heaven

Tack Angel popped out of the Angel Family to bus to assess the damage to his Crystal Kingdom, followed by livid wives, and for some reason, Benjamin and Vape.

Tack Angel: It's worse that I thought!

Pirate Bill: Yarr! Me be welcomin' ye home sir. Just wish it were under better circumstances.

Tack Angel: Yarr Bill. Yarr. This is....this is horrible. Are they are destroyed?

Pirate Bill: Aye sir. The hanger be destroyed along with them. That be includin' the sewer system, so a "yellow let it mellow brown flush it down" policy has been put into place.

Tack Angel: This sucks! How am I supposed to go back to Summers and compete at The Golden, when I know my Kingdom is like this, and in possibly more danger now. It's more exposed than ever! Wait...what about Mecha Syldra?

Pirate Ralph: Uh, I can field that one your lordship. See, Taquito was lawn darted right into the side of the ship. Now he someone survived, but he smashed through the transformation servos, so the ship is stuck in the lake as is.

Tack Angel: TAQUITOOOOO! Where is my sweet baby boy? Where is he? Is he suffering? Is Uncle Tack going to have to put him down?

Pirate Ralph: What?! No no, he's fine....ish. The good Doctor Degrees came and got him.

Amy Angel: This is a disaster. The cost of repairs will be enormous.

Tack Angel: I'd ask my Dad for help, but I don't know what wall he's in right now. It could be any wall anywhere for all I know.

Nani Angel: Iroha, and the children, they require security measures. What have you done to protect them?

Pirate Ralph: Well, that's been a little easier said than done. Most of the pirates have been coming up with their own ideas. One of them tried to teach a bat to wield a gun, but now he just have an armed bat roaming the Kingdom.

Tracy Angel: What?!

Faris Angel: *sigh* Pirate Phil....I bet it was Pirate Phil.

Pirate Ralph: Right as always my Queen.

Amy Angel: Well, we all have jobs to do, and we can't sit on the sidelines if we want to raise the money for repairs. That being said, we will have to make another expenditure to ensure our home is safe. We'll need some sort of hired security. 

Makoto Angel: Let's go check online, and see what we can find.

Amy Angel: Great idea.

Tack Angel: Yeah, maybe we need another kind of army until I can breed my own.

Faris Angel: What?

Tack Angel: Nothing! Say how is Iroha do-OH NO MY BROWSER HISTORY!

Tack started bolting inside where Amy and Makoto were checking Tack's computer to look up a security group. Time seemed to slow down, as fear and panic built within him. He ran in to find he was too late.

Makoto Angel: "Muscle Girl Doormat"?

Tack Angel: NOOOOOO!!!!

Amy Angel: What is this Tack? What in the world?

Tack Angel: ....You ever like...have a laser sharp fetish that is specifically yours?

Around the corner, Vape and Benjamin popped in.

Benjamin: I didn't need to know about that.

Vape: Me either, but let's investigate the crime scene! Let's go

EBW World

Nerma: Welcome to EBW World, where we catch you up, with what's going on in EBW. Big changes this whole week with the company, and Tess decided to let me call some action again, so that's nice I guess. Still, things could change again in a big way with The Golden. So many titles are on the line, and the non-title matches all have huge stakes! Check a peak at this card for The Golden, the culmination of EBW's Golden Week!

EBW: The Golden
EFL Beach Bums Stadium, Summers
ENN+

1. EBW Women's World Tag Team Championships: Kaie(c)/Duvalie(c) vs. Calamity Jane/Lainey Strong vs. Kimber Blaze/Lt. Lacy Wagner vs. Christina Angel/Makoto Angel
2. EBW World Tag Team Championships: w00t(c)/Hotlanta(c) vs. Grind/Switchback vs. Kinniku Mike/Amigo
3. EBW Television Championship: Subculture(c) vs. Firebrand X vs. Generator vs. Maurice
4. Loser Leaves EBW: Sal Paradise vs. Jamie OD
5. EBW Women's Television Championship: Hope Mach(c) vs. Troian
6. Singles: Bashin Dan vs. Cadmus
7. Intergender Tag: Tack Angel/Faris Angel vs. Cadmus/Bellerophon
8. EBW Women's World Championship: Erica(c) vs. Winner of Killer Queen
9. EBW Triple Crown World Championship: Trevor Mach(c) vs. "The Golden" Mav Valentine

Nerma: It's on, and it's coming soon, so don't miss it.

Last edited by Machismo (5/08/2020 7:45 am)