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Ted Pettentool: Hey there Xciters and Renegades, it’s your old pal the Toolbox Ted Pettentool, dressed up AS a toolbox, because I just got back from a costume party! Boy how about that Demon Boogie huh? Think Joe Bob would let me hang out with him? No, I don’t think so either. *sigh* Once again, the hit horror host presided over one of EBW’s biggest events of the year. The clean up in Zombie U is going to take days, especially after the thrilling climax with The Grindhouse! There is a reason they have only busted that thing out four times now. We can’t rest on our laurels here, as Halloween might be passing us by, but-
Ninten: We have to do anything and everything we can to fight the corporations putting Christmas decorations up already!
Ted Pettentool: Huh?
Ninten: If I have to hear Mariah Carey for a single solitary second I might lose my mind. That might happen. I might go feral and start swinging my baseball bat! I might strangle people with my Yo-Yo! We don’t know WHAT I might do…so let’s avoid it!
Ted Pettentool: Uh…yeah…let’s do that.
Good News Gary: Good News Everyone! Rains won the costume contest!
Ted Pettentool: You mean I lost? How? I’m a Toolbox! The joke writes itself! What did he dress up as?
Good News Gary: Blue Rains! Isn’t that funny! I-
Bad News Barry: You idiot! That wasn’t Rains dressed as Blue Rains! That was just Blue Rains!
Good News Gary: But then who was that guy dressed up as Rains?
Bad News Barry: That was just Rains!
Good News Gary: OH NO! I got to go pick him up from the party!
Bad News Barry: IDIOT!
Ted Pettentool: …We got our best and brightest working tonight folks. Swift was quick to announce a card for Xcite after Demon Boogie, and he’s taking a shot at Havok with the location. This will be Xcite’s debut in Love’s Arena after Mav Valentine won it from Havok just a couple weeks ago. The opening match will see Usagi Tsukino, hot from the antics of the 3Queens, taking on Queen of the Frost Hilda Iceheart. CXJ action up next as Brother Tiburon and Kiva team up to take on a mystery team. Mav Valentine and Jackson Kain had a great showdown at Demon Boogie, but Kain called for a “Sequel” right after his narrow defeat. That match is happening just days later, and this time the winner is the #1 Contender for the EBW Mars Championship! The Rizz with new member Snakebite will take on Magnum PT, Brunson Burner, and Dungaree Danson of the Weekend Wrecking Crew in 6-Man tag action. Erica and Gianna Rambaldi of 3Queens will take on a dynamic duo of Christina Angel and Makoto Kino in tag action. The main event will see EBW Champion Rama Raju team with Dan Club to take on NEW Mars Champion Tack Angel, former champ Geoff Garrett, Saxon, and Novus of the Weekend Wrecking Crew. The winners will be lined up to take on Samurai Ifrit of Havok Brand to try and claim the World Team Championship Rings AND The Storm.
EBW: Xcite
Love’s Arena, Valentine
ENN
1. Women’s Singles: Hilda Iceheart vs. Usagi Tsukino
2. CXJ Division Tag: Brother Tiburon/Kiva vs. ?/?
3. EBW Mars Championship #1 Contender: Mav Valentine vs. Jackson Kain
4. 6-Man Tag: Troy/Razorblade/Snakebite vs. Magnum PT/Brunson Burner/Dungaree Danson
5. Women’s Tag: Erica/Gianna Rambaldi vs. Christina Angel/Makoto Kino
6. EBW World Team Championship #1 Contender: Rama Raju/Bashin Dan/Jammer/Jaden Yuki vs. Tack Angel/Geoff Garrett/Saxon/Novus
Ted Pettentool: Darius Grouch immediately fired back, announcing his card from the Metal Militia homebase of Iwata Memorial Arena in Onett. The faction is quickly becoming an overwhelming force of the past coming back to haunt the present to create a new future, that appears to be the motto of the team. Women’s World Champion Paula, Women’s World Tag Team Champions Darkness Aoi and Mitra Lennox, and the returning Grind all joined up to really hammer home how serious this conflict is. The group is all over the next Havok, which will see Hotlanta and Generator challenge Mike Thunder and Isiah Muscle of Samurai Ifrit for the World Tag Team Championships. That’s right, they’re not just targeting Blood 4 Blood anymore. The World Team Champion foursome that recently added Seto Kaiba to their ranks are on notice. Crono will battle the heat-less Fighter Daron for a shot at Subculture’s Television Championship in a Strikes Only bout. Boz will battle Dougie Mach in a Bushido Rules match. Picky Minch will go one-on-one with w00t. Lainey Strong, ready to defend her friend and partner Wendy Mustang, will take on Darkness Aoi in Lady Renegades action. The main event is a big one though, as Ness will accept a challenge thrown down by Cade Yaggis. The former protege of Ness has had it with his group’s actions against Blood 4 Blood, and Havok in general. We know that at some point during the show, Paula is going to address the Havok Renegades, and she apparently has a big announcement to make that will change Metal Militia and Havok itself. You know what I’d say about that? DON’T MISS IT!
Sal Paradise: Especially because WE’LL be there!
Ted Pettentool: Whoa!
Boomtown: Mike and Son or Metal Militia, might just have to feel the BOOM baby!
EBW: Havok
Iwata Memorial Arena, Onett
ENT
1. World Tag Team Championships: Mike Thunder(c)/Isiah Muscle(c) vs. Hotlanta/Generator
2. EBW Television #1 Contender Strikes Only: Crono vs. Fighter Daron
3. Bushido Rules Singles: Boz vs. Dougie Mach
4. Singles: Picky Minch vs. w00t
5. Lady Renegades Singles: Lainey Strong vs. Darkness Aoi
6. Singles: Ness vs. Cade Yaggis
The Angel Express - On route to Valentine
A party was taking place aboard the Angel Express as they made their way to the next destination for Xcite. Tack Angel clutched his Mars Championship tighter every time a member of his beloved Weekend Wrecking Crew would approach, surely in jest, as not even Geoff Garrett was too bothered about the outcome of the King of the Mountain match. Double G was strutting his stuff and laughing it up with Saxon and Novus as they planned his upcoming nuptials to Tracy. Christy Angel was sitting next to her father, wearing a blanket and drinking some cocoa to calm down after the traumatizing events of Demon Boogie.
Tack Angel: You doing alright daughter?
Christy Angel: As long as we don’t see anymore masked killers. Should I be on this bus? It’s going to Valentine. I’m on the “other team”.
Tack Angel: We’ll drop you off at Onett on our way. Besides, you’re my daughter and that trumps anything else.
Christy Angel: Thanks. I’m sorry we haven’t talked much lately, but it was literally all Tracy’s fault.
Tack Angel: Oh yeah? You and Christina didn’t much care for your Mom huh?
Christy Angel: She never felt like our real Mom. I can’t explain it, but Christina feels the same way. Something feels off.
Tack Angel: Someone said something to me that had me feeling the same way to be honest. I’m…I’m sorry I didn’t see it before. I haven’t been the most aware person. But I will try my best to be far more aware and notice obvious things like that.
Makoto Kino: Uh…hey Tack…you uh…having a good night?
Tack Angel: Huh? Oh yeah! I’m just sitting here with the daughter. You all having fun?
Makoto Kino: Oh yes, it’s a festive night. I was worried that Rick Shaw might be worried that we’re bumping around back here, but he seems to be solid as a rock. He really brings everything together.
Tack Angel: Truly.
Makoto Kino: I’m gonna go check on him right now…maybe see if he wants to take a break…so I’ll be up there…alone.
Tack Angel: …That’s…really nice of you. Thank you for that!
Makoto Kino: …*blush* Right.
Tack Angel: *sigh* She’s nice huh. Such a good good friend.
Christy Angel: …Dad.
Tack Angel: Hmm?
Christy Angel: You’re head over heels for Makoto.
Tack Angel: What Daughter?! What?!
Christy Angel: I know you and Mom just got divorced…but if I can be frank-
Tack Angel: You’re not Frank. You’re Christy, my daughter.
Christy Angel: …You and her were never quite the same after the incident with Tali. She just ran back to you cause it was safe. She was always manipulating you. Makoto though, she’s the real deal.
Tack Angel: Yeah, she’s really been a good friend since-
Christy Angel: DAD!
Tack Angel: …What could she possibly see in me? I’m a nervous guy, I’m down on myself too much, and-
Christy Angel: You’re the best Dad I could’ve asked for, and you’ve never given up on us or yourself. Sometimes that’s enough.
Tack Angel: …When did you get so smart Christy?
Christy Angel: I don’t know, but don’t tell anybody. That means I’d have to do something with it, and I don’t really wanna.
Tack Angel: Right. Wait…should I be supporting that?
Christy Angel: Go spend time with Makoto.
Tack Angel: R-Right. I’m off.
Tack took a deep breath as he opened the door to the front of the bus. He passed by Rick Shaw, who patted him on the back and gave him a big wink and finger guns. Tack groaned and went into the front of the bus.
Tack Angel: *Clears his throat* Hey, Makoto.
Makoto Kino: Oh, hi, Tack! What's up?
Tack Angel: Uh, not much. Just thought I'd come chat with you, you know, keep you company?
Makoto Kino: Sure, Tack! I’d love that! What's on your mind?
Tack Angel: *Gulps* Well, I was thinking... You're pretty amazing at driving this thing. It's almost as if you're steering the wheel of my heart.
Makoto Kino: Huh? I didn’t hear all of that. What about my driving skills?
Tack Angel: Uh, no, no! I mean, your driving skills are great, but I was trying to say that... you've really got this, uh, incredible presence, you know? Like a dazzling star in the night sky.
Makoto Kino: Oh! Uh…thank you, Tack. That's really sweet.
Tack Angel: You know, I was also thinking that maybe... when we have some downtime, we could grab a bite to eat together? There's this fantastic place I know with the most mouthwatering chocolate parfaits, and I thought it could be a great opportunity for us to, you know, connect.
Makoto Kino: That sounds nice, Tack. I'm always up for sweets. But, you do know you're not bothering me when you want to chat, right?
Tack Angel: Oh, well, I... I just thought, maybe, you know, we could chat more over parfaits…chocolate ones specifically. It's all about the connections, you see. Ya know?
Makoto Kino: Uh…no? But…I’d like to hear more about it…if you want to sit by me. You could drive to if you-
Tack Angel: NO! WE’D ALL DIE!
Makoto Kino: AH!
Tack Angel: Sorry! Sorry…I uh…would LOVE to sit WITH you though.
Makoto Kino: Great!
As Tack sat next to Makoto happily, the moment was briefly interrupted with their good good friend Geoff Garrett.
Geoff Garrett: Hey Slap Angel! MaSlapo!
Tack Angel: Idon’tlikethatname.
Makoto Kino: Haha! You’re so funny Double G!
Tack Angel: Uh…y-yeah. He’s great right?
Geoff Garrett: Before I forget I had something for you! After everything that has happened with Tracy and the Mars Championship, I wanted you to know that your friend, tag partner, part time Pastor, and fellow bus rider had no hard feelings whatsoever regarding-
Tack Angel: IbelieveyoucanthatbeenoughfortheloveofGodpleaseleave.
Geoff Garrett: I thought you might be lonely ya see, during those times you don’t have The Crew with you! That’s why I got you this!
Double G reached over towards Tack. Tack CLUTCHED his Mars Championship like his CLUTCHES his WRIST, but Double G placed something in his lap…a furry little kitten.
Geoff Garrett: He’s all yours buddy!
Tack Angel: Pardon?
Geoff Garrett: His name is Catzenmeow! Enjoy!
Tack Angel: ….I’MNOTAPETOWN-
Makoto Kino: Awww! He’s so cute! I love him!
Tack Angel: Uh…hehe…me…me too.
Makoto Kino: Are you bleeding from the mouth again?
Tack Angel: Don’t worry about it.
Last edited by Machismo (11/01/2023 12:50 am)
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Love’s Arena - Parking Lot
Rama Raju got off his motorcycle and made his way towards the arena to a boisterous reaction from the audience. As he walked towards the doors, he heard a snap behind him. He turned around to see Colby Roads snapping his weight belt to get Raju’s attention.
Colby Roads: Hey, where do you think you’re going?
Rama Raju: I have a match to attend to tonight…you’re not in it, so I’ll be on my w-
CP Munk: You don’t get to go anywhere until The Eagleland Cheese says you can.
Rama Raju: You’d better hurry, because I saw the Angel Express pulling in behind me.
CP Munk: What?! Where?! That’s not funny!
Rama Raju: I did make you look though.
Colby Roads: Someone like you shouldn’t be EBW Champion. That belt belongs to ME! It’s meant to be mine!
Rama Raju: …You lost to Bashin Dan.
Colby Roads: I was cheated by Bashin Dan! He’s trying to get in the way of MY STORY! See, I’m the PROTAGONIST of Wrestling, and this is MY story, and you’re all just characters in it. The story goes, Colby Roads beats Rama Raju to finally get what belongs to him! It’s just that simple. I’m not just doing this for me! I’m doing it for *lip quiver on command* my Dad!
Rama Raju: …Crusty Roads was a fine wrestler, and a good man…you lack his quality.
Colby Roads: …This ain’t over. I WILL FINISH! THE! STORY!
"Yngwie Malmsteen - My Resurrection"
Larry Grim: Xciters! Look where we’re at! It’s Valentine, LIVE at Love’s Arena where the heroic and victorious Xcite Brand is HAPPY to call one of our homes! We’re just days separated from Demon Boogie, and it lived up in all ways! Like usual it’s one of the biggest shows of the year and it did NOT disappoint!
Apple Kid: It disappointed me in one way! Makoto didn’t win the EBW Women’s Championship! She was doing great, and then that villainous Bellerophon returned and cost her the title in the Lumberghost match!
Larry Grim: Yeah, I didn’t much care for that either, and Bellerophon looked like she’d been lifting weights or something, cause she’s not as slender as before.
Apple Kid: Makoto isn’t with us tonight because she’s going to be competing tonight! She’s spending more time training, and more time in the ring. Talk about commitment! We’re rooting for her obviously, but we need a female voice at the table right? So that’s why we’re apparently getting a broadcast colleague tonight to-
Tracy: You sure are!
Apple Kid: AH!
Larry Grim: She’s BEEN sitting there this whole time.
Apple Kid: The camera didn’t reveal her yet, so I couldn’t see her!
Larry Grim: …That’s not how that works.
Tracy: You two clowns needed some class at this booth. You need experience, and I’ve GOT IT!
Apple Kid: Don’t we know it?
Tracy: WHAT WAS THAT?!
Apple Kid: HAHA! I WAS KIDDING!
Tracy: I’ll end you Apple. Don’t think I won’t. I know what you’re thinking. I know why they’re all booing. I don’t care. I know my truth, and I freed myself from the clutches of a monster. He’s the sociopath, not me…that being said…I’m really proud of his growth as a person…and uh…I’m glad my new soon to be husband wants him to be his Best Man. Having Tack continue to be in my life is…just…great.
Larry Grim: And it’s good for your kids to-
Tracy: I don’t really think too much about them.
Larry Grim: Great.
Tracy: I know everyone wants to see me back in the ring, and they will. They want to see me now that I am free to be myself…they’ll see that. They’ll see that very soon. Until then though, I’m going to relax, enjoy the show, and plan for next week’s wedding! That’s right, next week on Xcite I’m getting married, and you’re all invited…even if you don’t deserve it. *spits on the floor*
Apple Kid: Whoa! Watch it!
Tracy: ….
Apple Kid: I wish Minako were here.
Tracy: Yeah, I’m gonna beat her too.
Apple Kid: NO!
Larry Grim: Apple…and Tracy…we have a big show tonight, including a main event that will see which team is going to cross over into enemy territory and try and take the World Team Championship Rings and The Storm. We start with a tale of revenge though. Hilda Iceheart, part of the new 3Queens faction, will take on Usagi Tsukino.
Tracy: *yawn*
Larry Grim: Hilda had THIS to say earlier in the day!
-
Hilda Iceheart: I have learned the ways of this sport, and I’ve learned not only how to survive, but to thrive. I am the Ice Queen. I am Shiva. I am neither a saint nor a savior, just another sinner. Yet I will not forsake this cause. I cannot. I will see that the 3Queens stand atop the mountain. The “school girls” have to learn the hard way.
-
Tracy: Hm. Maybe she’s not so bad after all. I like the attitude.
Apple Kid: …Yeah?
Larry Grim: Usagi was going to be interviewed, but she came running in late with toast in her mouth, and she tripped and broke the lighting rig. Tack offered to pay for it.
Tracy: He’d better have enough to cover the alimony.
Apple Kid: She’s determined! She wants to avenge her friends. LOYALTY IS VERY IMPORTANT!
Tracy: Why are you looking at me when you say that?
Apple Kid: NO REASON!
Larry Grim: Let’s get to the opening contest shall we?
EBW: Xcite
Love’s Arena, Valentine
ENN
1. Women’s Singles: Hilda Iceheart vs. Usagi Tsukino
-In the opening match, Hilda Iceheart and Usagi Tsukino prepared to square off in a fierce wrestling match. Hilda, confident and composed as one-half of the EBW Women's Tag Team Champions and a member of 3Queens, exuded an air of icy determination. Usagi, on the other hand, was driven by a mix of determination and a desire to avenge her friend Makoto, who had fallen victim to Hilda's ally in a previous match. As the match got underway, Hilda's confidence was evident in her every move. She moved with calculated precision, utilizing her technical prowess and physicality to keep Usagi at bay. Usagi, despite her clumsiness, showed remarkable resilience and a fiery spirit. She was determined to make Hilda pay for her previous actions. The two competitors engaged in a back-and-forth contest, with Hilda attempting to ground Usagi with a series of punishing holds and strikes. Usagi, however, fought valiantly, refusing to back down. She showcased her determination and unwavering spirit as she managed to counter some of Hilda's offensive maneuvers. Just when it seemed that Usagi might gain the upper hand, the match took a dramatic turn. Bellerophon, a figure associated with Hilda and 3Queens, suddenly made her presence known. With a vicious assault, he attacked Usagi, delivering a brutal blow that lead to the DQ.
Winner: Usagi Tsukino via DQ
Backstage
Makoto Kino and Christina Angel ran over to check on Usagi, as Rei, Ami, and Minako carried her to the back.
Makoto Kino: Oh no! Usagi? Are you alright?
Usagi Tsukino: My head…is spinning…did you know I have a talking cat?
Minako Aino: Of course we do Usagi. We all do. I do too.
Christina Angel: I didn’t…uh…actually know that. I can’t think about that right now. Usagi, did you notice something funny about Bellerophon?
Usagi Tsukino: Ugh…argle…uh…
Rei Hino: She’s not going to be much help right now.
Ami Mizuno: What’s on your mind Christina?
Christina Angel: Something seems different from before. She and her brother Cadmus used to pester my Dad a LOT. She wasn’t very aggressive before, but now she’s throwing hard shots like that? I guess Cadmus trained her…or maybe she’s been working with Erica? Something just seems….off.
Makoto Kino: It didn’t feel great when she attacked me either. She hit a lot harder than you’d expect. Did Erica know Bellerophon from before?
Christina Angel: Who knows? Erica has always had friends in high and low places, even when she acted like she didn’t. I’ve been a little too lax lately. I’ve been healing up from my own injuries, had a little fun with Alison Chains for a bit, and focusing on my recent move with Subbie. I was even thinking about motherhood sooner rather than later, but now…now I think this is what happens when I ease up. Erica returned to power. I went through-
Ami Mizuno: We know Christina…the historic gauntlet. No one is going to forget you running through all of Eisenritter in one night. We all hope to match that talent and that force of will. We-
?: Oi! Jus lemme me at ‘er! Ah’ll kek ‘eh in teh faenny!
Ami Mizuno: Eh?
Christina Angel: Who? Wait…I know you…you’re Moira-
Moira Lees: Moira Lees ya wee posh princess! Ah’m bak ta taek car o’ business around ere, and have ah cheeky fight or two! Oot ‘o me way ya frae *bleep* *bleep* *bleep* *bleep*ers!
Christina Angel: …Look…*turns to the crowd* Moira’s back everybody…hurray?
-
Tracy: Christina….such a disappointment. The one thing Tack and I ever agreed on was the mistake she made marrying Subculture. Planning to be a housewife? At her age? She’s got 10 years of prime dominance she could be exploiting, and instead she wants to “settle down?” Pathetic!
Apple Kid: You’re getting remarried though!
Tracy: To a wonderful man who intends to fulfill all my hopes and dreams, and allow me to live my life the way I want. I’m filling the gap in his heart from his dead wife, and he’ll fill the gap in my-
Larry Grim: Moving on! CXJ! It’s back! Johnny Starbound jumped to our brand and won the belt, but he was very disrespectful about it! We don’t share his disdain for the craft of CXJ. It put EBW on the map. Trevor Mach is a former champ for example! Tonight, we have a surprise for you. All the way from Anahauc, it’s the return of Hoodlum and Hooligan, major players from P+P are back, as they take on Brother Tiburon and Kiva! Let’s do it to it!
2. CXJ Division Tag: Brother Tiburon/Kiva vs. Hoodlum/Hooligan
-Brother Tiburon and Kiva, the embodiment of lucha libre tradition, were set to take on the crafty duo of Hoodlum and Hooligan. The action exploded in a blur of acrobatics and dazzling moves. Brother Tiburon, known for his righteous persona and breathtaking agility, and Kiva, a masked marvel with a reputation for high-flying excellence, wasted no time in showcasing their lucha libre artistry. On the opposing side, Hoodlum and Hooligan, the devious and cunning tag team, aimed to use their underhanded tactics to gain an advantage. With their gritty style and penchant for bending the rules, they sought to undermine their high-flying opponents. Brother Tiburon and Kiva displayed incredible teamwork, seamlessly tagging in and out to keep the momentum in their favor. Their lightning-fast double-team maneuvers and breathtaking aerial assaults had the Xciters on their feet. Hoodlum and Hooligan, however, were not to be underestimated. They fought back with a mix of cunning tactics and brawling expertise. Hoodlum's calculated strikes and Hooligan's ferocious power moves added a layer of intensity to the match, keeping their opponents on their toes. Brother Tiburon managed to isolate Hooligan in the ring, setting the stage for Kiva to ascend the turnbuckle. With an electrifying leap, he soared through the air, executing the Kiva Dive, where it appears like he is hanging upside down in mid air briefly, before slamming Hooligan for the pinfall victory.
Winners: Brother Tiburon/Kiva[o] via Kiva Dive on Hooligan -> Pin
Apple Kid: Great action from both teams, and an incredible win from Kiva! We’re so glad to have him back in Eagleland and wrestling for the best brand in the sport! Xcite is where you find the CXJ division!
Tracy: It was sufficient I suppose, BUT this is far more interesting to me.
Apple Kid: What is?
Tracy: Look at the stage Apple Dork.
Apple Kid: It’s Johnny Star- Apple Dork?
Larry Grim: The CXJ Champion is on the stage. What does he have to say?
Johnny Starbound: Well, that was something wasn’t it? A bunch of acrobats flipping, flopping, and flying around. I do that too, but when I do it, it at least LOOKS real right? Oh what did I mean by that? It’s simple everybody! You have to see it! You can’t be that stupid! People are just going to stand and look up at somebody that’s about to jump off a turnbuckle? THIS IS FAKE! THE WHOLE CXJ DIVISION IS FAKE! I WAS PICKED TO WIN THIS STUPID BELT! IT’S TRASH! I took it for the money, but the title means nothing and you have NO REASON to care about it or to watch it!
Tracy: HAHAHA!
Apple Kid: What?! CXJ is fake? It is NOT! Is it?
Larry Grim: We are 100% legitimate! This is NOT Sports Entertainment World…though we do run in North Point now….THAT is not the point. The point is, the words of the CXJ Champion were his own and not ours. He’s lying about the division that he himself is champion of, and that’s just no good. Xciters, we’re stunned by that, but we have to move onto the next match, and it is a doozy! Do you want Pay Per View quality on the weekly show? You got it! This match JUST dazzled at Demon Boogie, and the rematch or the “Sequel” has even higher stakes, as the winner will get the right to challenge for the EBW Mars Championship! Mav Valentine vs. Jackson Kain 2: The Revenge!
3. EBW Mars Championship #1 Contender: Mav Valentine vs. Jackson Kain
-Movie Mega-Star Jackson Kain and the wild, charismatic Mav Valentine were ready to script another chapter in their fierce rivalry, with the right to challenge the EBW Mars Champion on the line. Jackson Kain, known for his striking good looks and acting prowess, faced off against the enigmatic Mav Valentine, whose unorthodox style and unpredictable antics had matched Jackson Kain. Mav Valentine wasted no time, charging toward Kain with a series of lightning-fast strikes and unpredictable movements. He used his unorthodox style to keep Jackson off balance, moving with the grace of a martial artist and the unpredictability of a wild card, confident after his win over Jackson at Demon Boogie 3. Jackson Kain, however, was not about to lose twice in a row. The actor turned wrestler had honed his skills and possessed a natural athleticism that allowed him to counter Mav's frenetic attacks. He landed crisp strikes and combined them with powerful grappling maneuvers to regain control of the match. Mav Valentine attempted a high-risk aerial maneuver, leaping from the top rope with a breathtaking corkscrew senton. However, Jackson Kain narrowly avoided the attack, rolling out of the way just in time. Seizing the opportunity, Kain quickly regrouped and sprang into action. He unleashed a devastating Shadow Kick, and Mav crumpled to the mat. Jackson pinned him for the 1-2-3.
Winner: Jackson Kain via Shadow Kick -> Pin
Larry Grim: What an encounter! Jackson Kain gets the win back with a sudden Shadow Kick, and now HE has the right to challenge for the Mars Championship!
Tracy: I think Geoff should get his REMATCH…but for SOME REASON Tack put the kibosh on that. People don’t see what’s actually going on there. You have no idea.
Apple Kid: It’s because they’re such good friends, he wanted to allow Geoff to focus on his upcoming wedding!
Tracy: ….*sigh* You know what?
Tracy slammed Apple Kid’s face into the deck, and pushed all of his stuff off before tossing her chair to the side and walking away.
Apple Kid: OW! I think she just…she just broke my nose!
Larry Grim: Yeah, it’s bleeding bad. Let’s cut to a statement by President Swift while we take a look at that yeah?
President Swift’s Office
Swift: I want to make something perfectly sparkling CRYSTAL CLEAR! The CXJ Division is NOT fake! We have real athletes fighting out there! Yes, it’s a little different! They have a different style. That’s how they compete! This is the spotlight for their approach, and it is anything BUT fake! Johnny Starbound will need to tread lightly as our CXJ Champion. Don’t worry Johnny, you keep this up, and I’ll see to it you’re not champ for long, even if I have to cut weight, put on a mask, and learn a Moonsault! I’ll flip you like a table! GAAAAHHH!
-
Larry Grim: He seems…upset? Apple friend, keep your nose tilted back, the bleeding should stop soon.
Apple Kid: That really hurt.
Larry Grim: She’s really gone “mask off” hasn’t she? *sigh*
-
Colby Roads: Now here’s a guy who’s a complete ingrate. Everybody knows what an ingrate is right? Well, I guess it’s possible you don’t. Let me break it down for you. He’s a bad guy…he’s no good. I’m talking about Rama Raju. This ingrate…this imbecile…he comes to Eagleland with nothing…with absolutely nothing, EXCEPT a story that he has to finish, and that story is revenge. So what does he do? He completes it! He completes the story! Here’s the problem though…he doesn’t get out of the way when the story is over. He is done! He is over! IT’S MY TIME NOW! I’ll show you….right now!
-
Larry Grim: What’s that? I’m hearing that Colby Roads has demanded a match right now? We’re adding a match? Oh wow. Yeah, so Colby Roads “The Eagleland Cheese” is coming out to have a match with…Hawk of the Eagleland Gladiators. You never know what’s going to happen with Xcite!
Apple Kid: *holding nose* TELL ME ABOUT IT!
4. Singles: Colby Roads vs. Hawk
-Next up, Colby Roads entered the ring with an air of confidence, while Hawk, representing the indomitable spirit of the Eagleland Gladiators, was ready for any challenge that came his way. Colby's plan was evident from the outset. With LG Rod and Randy no Kachi lurking on the outside of the ring, Colby aimed to use any means necessary to gain an advantage. The Xciters were rooting for the pure strength and honor of Hawk. The two competitors engaged in a physical and psychological battle, with Colby using every opportunity to distract and outmaneuver Hawk. LG Rod and Randy no Kachi played their part, providing timely distractions and interference to keep Hawk off balance. Despite the odds stacked against him, Hawk showcased his resilience and determination. He absorbed Colby's calculated attacks and withstood the tactics of the two wrestlers on the outside. The crowd's cheers grew louder as Hawk fought to overcome the adversity and stay true to the gladiatorial spirit that defined the Eagleland Gladiators. The turning point of the match came when LG Rod and Randy no Kachi attempted another interference, drawing the attention of the referee. With the official distracted, Colby Roads took advantage and hit a low blow before he executed his finishing move, the Cross Roads, with precision.
Winner: Colby Roads via Cross Roads -> Pin
Colby Roads: KEEP YOUR EYES OPEN RAJU, AND WATCH YOUR BACK, OR THE EAGLELAND CHEESE WILL BECOME AN EAGLELAND NIGHTMARE FOR YOU! I WANT MY TITLE SHOT!
Rama Raju’s Locker Room
Bashin Dan, Jammer, and Jaden Yuki made their way to the champ’s locker room.
Bashin Dan: Is he OK though?
Jaden Yuki: Dude bro, that was hella sick, he was messed up!
Jammer: Yes, BUT….Degrees was able to re-attach his hand…so he’s…”fine?” I say fine, cause was he fine BEFORE the uh…degloving?
Bashin Dan: The what?
Jaden Yuki: The hand was skinned Dan! That’s wiggity-wiggity-
Bashin Dan: I think I’m going to be sick! It is indeed “whack” Jaden. *gags* I’m just glad he’s alive. That Slayer is not one to be taken lightly. What did they do with the body?
Jammer: They found Alison Chains running over it repeatedly, and took it to the morgue. It uh…it disappeared after that.
Bashin Dan: IT WHAT?!
Jammer: We’re not supposed to tell Tack until next Halloween…as a…surprise?
Bashin Dan: I really feel like he should kno-
Jaden Yuki: We’re here!
Bashin Dan: Oh good.
Jammer: Yo Dan, I appreciate the friendship you got going with Raju. All of us in Dan Club are better off for your friendship, I’m not going to deny that. However, you’re putting a big target on your back. Rumors are swirling around that he’s got a lot of the “boys” ready to come after him for the belt. All eyes are on him right now, and if you’re aligning yourself with him WHILE getting another title shot-
Bashin Dan: I don’t think he’s worried about it. I don’t think he worries about anything. If he’s not worried, I’m not worried.
Jammer: Well alright then. I said what I had to say about it. You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take…and I miss 95% of the shots I DO take, but the metaphor is getting off track.
Bashin Dan: Fact is, Rama Raju is an athlete like EBW’s never seen before, the kind of guy I want to be rivals with. If I’m ever going to be truly seen as the very best, he’s the one I’m going to have to eventually beat. Isn’t that awesome?
Jammer: Hey, you do you man. I mean I’VE beat you before too…
Jaden Yuki: Dude, is my boy Jammer jealous?!
Jammer: NO! I’m just….I’m just pointing things out is all! Shut up Jaden!
5. 6-Man Tag: Troy/Razorblade/Snakebite vs. Magnum PT/Brunson Burner/Dungaree Danson
-Next up, a classic southern brawling showdown was about to take place. In one corner, we had the formidable Weekend Wrecking Crew team of Magnum PT, Dungaree Danson, and Brunson Burner, three burly and no-nonsense fighters, ready to unleash their raw power. On the other side, "The Rizz" - Troy, Razorblade, and Snakebite - lead by their devious manager, Preacher Ra, were known for their cunning tactics and ruthless nature. Magnum PT, the swarthy Lothario with a chest hair to match his bravado, started things off for his team. With a powerful tie-up and a series of thunderous chops, he aimed to assert dominance early in the match. Dungaree Danson, the cocky dude, and Brunson Burner, the burly brawler, followed suit, laying into their opponents with punches, kicks, and clubbing blows. "The Rizz," however, were no strangers to rough and tumble action. Razorblade, with his rule-breaking reputation from VBW, displayed a ruthless streak as he targeted Dungaree Danson with underhanded tactics. Snakebite, an enigmatic figure known for his cunning, struck with precision, exploiting every opening to weaken the opposition. Troy, the unofficial leader of "The Rizz," had a no-nonsense approach. The formidable brawler aimed to lead his team to victory, and his powerful kicks and strikes came into play as he battled the imposing Brunson Burner. The chaos inside the ring spilled to the outside. Preacher Ra, the devious manager, played his part in distracting the opposition and ensuring that "The Rizz'' maintained control. Troy seized the opportunity. He delivered a devastating Punt Kick, connecting squarely with the burly Brunson Burner and pinned the rotund opposition.
Winners: Troy[o]/Razorblade/Snakebite via Punt Kick to Brunson Burner -> Pin
Troy: GIVE ME THAT MICROPHONE! You think I came back just to kick in the heads of some HICKS! Not likely! You think I came here to bully some nerds?! I do that in my spare time! That’s what I do for fun and games! What I want isn’t a game, but it’s gonna be fun. Rama Raju! You brown skinned, smelly, disgusting waste of space! I want what YOU’VE GOT! I want the EBW Championship, and I’m gonna get it! IT’S MINE FOR THE TAKING!
Larry Grim: Oh wow, another member of the roster showing his intentions of coming for the EBW Champion Rama Raju. All eyes are on the champ, who WILL be in the main event tonight! He’ll be with the Dan Club as they take on The Weekend Wrecking Crew! Let’s check in on them now!
Weekend Wrecking Crew Locker Room
Tack Angel was stretching and kicking as Geoff Garrett.
Geoff Garrett: Whoa! You almost kicked me on accident Slap Angel!
Tack Angel: Right…accident.
Geoff Garrett: You know you can put the Mars belt down right? Might help you stretch and-
Tack Angel: You’d like that wouldn’t you?
Geoff Garrett: What?
Tack Angel: Nothing…I’m sorry. You know what, I have been in a funk lately. My divorce and everything after has clouded my mind for a while, but things aren’t that bad. In fact, we really should talk about Tracy. I’m worried that-
Geoff Garrett: I’m sorry with how it all went down Tack, but I promise you I never said a word to her until you two divorced.
Tack Angel: Really? That makes this wedding even more surprising. It’s so fast!
Geoff Garrett: When love strikes you have to take a hold of it. You have to strike while the iron is hot.
Tack Angel: I uh…I guess so. Maybe I should uh…talk to Makoto and-
Jackson Kain: Hey hey! Geoff Garrett, just the man I was looking to see!
Geoff Garrett: Slapson Kain, what can I do for ya?
Jackson Kain: Well, I now have a title match with Tack Angel for the Mars Championship!
Tack Angel: *clutches title harder* Ineveragreedto-
Jackson Kain: However…my sights are on a different prize. I want to jump into the pool of everyone wanting to test Rama Raju. I want the EBW Championship. That’s when an idea hit me. A wedding gift for the soon to be wed Geoff Garrett.
Tack Angel: No.
Jackson Kain: That’s why I’m going to gift you something special right here and now.
Tack Angel: NO.
Jackson Kain: The Mars Championship #1 Contendership-
Tack Angel: NO NO NO!
Jackson Kain: IS!
Tack Angel: NO NO NO NO NO!
Jackson Kain: YOOOOOOURS!
Tack Angel: *indescribable screeching*
Geoff Garrett: Hey hey! Ya hear that buddy? We’re gonna have a friendly competition over Ol’ Rusty there HAHA! *Jackie Fargo struts away*
Tack Angel: ….It’s ruby.
Jackson Kain: What?
Tack Angel: YOU CAN GET OUT!
6. Women’s Tag: Erica/Gianna Rambaldi vs. Christina Angel/Makoto Kino
-The next bout saw Women's Tag action. First out were EBW Women's Champion, Erica, and her partner, the crafty Gianna Rambaldi, both members of the formidable 3Queens faction. On the other side, Christina Angel and Makoto Kino, who were fan favorites and adored by the Xciter fans for their exceptional skills and unbreakable spirit. The match began with a show of force from both teams, as Christina Angel and Gianna Rambaldi kicked things off. The two women engaged in a series of rapid and technical exchanges, showcasing their exceptional wrestling abilities. Makoto Kino, the athletic and powerful Senshi, waited eagerly for her turn to enter the fray. As the contest unfolded, Erica and Gianna were obviously willing to bend the rules and resort to underhanded tactics to secure victory. Bellerophon, a presence on the outside, played a crucial role in their plan, often causing distractions that disrupted the flow of the match. Despite the odds, Christina Angel and Makoto Kino showed unwavering resilience and determination. They fought valiantly against the champion and her partner, with Makoto looking like she belonged with the main event talent. However, as the match neared its climax, the craftiness of Erica and Gianna Rambaldi proved to be the deciding factor. With Bellerophon's interference leading to a repeat of Demon Boogie, Erica seized the opportunity to execute her finishing maneuver, the Air Raid Crash, on the valiant Makoto Kino and pinned her for the win.
Winners: Erica[o]/Gianna Rambaldi via Air Raid Crash on Makoto -> Pin
Larry Grim: Erica, once again using the nefarious Bellerophon on the outside. The way she’s dressed like one of those gothic lollita types is unnerving considering she’s rather built these days. Makoto is once again the victim of an attack by Bellerophon, the apparent “maid” of 3Queens? Erica certainly treats her like one. Huh? Oh where is Apple Kid? Well Steve, his nose was broken. What did you expect him to stick around and call the rest of the show? I can do this. I don’t have a nose to break! It’s almost time for the main event anyways! What a chaotic show this has turned out to be.
Backstage
Tack Angel was leading his “Crew” to the ring for the big main event, when he suddenly stopped, turned around and saw a new figure behind him. An Edo man wearing a skeleton bandana around his nose and mouth.
Tack Angel: Who is this, and why is he following me?
Saxon: Him? That’s Bone Soldier!
Tack Angel: ….
Novus: He’s with us!
Tack Angel: ….
Saxon: Rupert Marshmellow is in the burn ward, so Geoff brought in another “boy” from Mid-South. Actually, he’s from New Edo Pro, but-
Tack Angel *tuning it all out with mellow elevator music*
Novus: But yeah, it’s your boy Bone Soldier!
Tack Angel: …*sigh* Let’s just…let’s just get out there.
-
Larry Grim: Bone Soldier huh? I bet I’m gonna like that guy!
7. EBW World Team Championship #1 Contender: Rama Raju/Bashin Dan/Jammer/Jaden Yuki vs. Tack Angel/Geoff Garrett/Saxon/Novus
-Main event time, with an 8-Man tag that would determine which team would invade Havok brand to try and claim the World Team Championship Rings in two weeks. On one side of the ring stood the formidable Weekend Wrecking Crew, comprised of the Mars Champion Tack Angel, the #1 Contender Geoff Garrett, and the Red Shirt Security duo, Saxon and Novus. In the opposite corner, the reigning EBW Champion, Rama Raju, led the charge alongside the Dan Club faction of Bashin Dan, Jammer, and Jaden Yuki. As the match got underway, the competitors wasted no time in showcasing their wrestling prowess. Tack Angel, the Mars Champion, and Rama Raju, the EBW Champion, engaged in a fiery exchange, embodying the fierce spirit of the contest. Their hard-hitting strikes and technical maneuvers set the tone for the entire match. A fantastic back and forth that gave Xciters a peek into what a one-on-one contest between the two would look like, which is an absolute dream match for many. Meanwhile, Geoff Garrett and Jaden Yuki displayed their flashy styles, dazzling the crowd with a clash of southern 'rasslin flair versus acrobatic moves and agility. The "Dangerous Player," brought his signature explosiveness into the mix, as he aimed to leave a lasting impact. On the outside of the ring, chaos unfolded as Colby Roads launched a surprise attack on the EBW Champion, Rama Raju. The unexpected assault sent shockwaves through the audience, creating an atmosphere of unpredictability. At the same time, Troy joined in on the outside skirmish, further adding to the bedlam. Jackson Kain rushed to aid Rama Raju, intensifying the outside brawl. Back inside the ring, Geoff Garrett took advantage of the distracted situation. Seizing the opportunity, he delivered his finishing maneuver, The Stroke, to Jaden Yuki, who had been momentarily isolated in the chaos. 1-2-3! The Weekend Wrecking Crew with the win and the chance to challenge for the World Team Championship Rings!
Winners: Tack Angel/Geoff Garrett[o]/Saxon/Novus via The Stroke on Jaden Yuki -> Pin
Larry Grim: Wow! Tack, Double G, and the Red Shirts are heading to Havok to go on a little INVASION ATTACK if you will for the Rings! Tack is throwing his hands up in the air, like that emoji of the smiley face that disintegrates! Probably because of all the title success he and his boys are having in the Weekend Wrecking Crew! All of this PLUS a wedding to plan for next week! Meanwhile Rama Raju and Dan Club are mixing it up with Colby Roads team AND The Rizz. CP Munk hasn’t come out though, because of course Tack is out there. Jackson Kain made it clear he wanted a title shot against Rama Raju, and now he’s helping him. Is that good sportsmanship or quid pro quo? I guess we’ll find out next week! See you then!
Last edited by Machismo (11/05/2023 5:43 am)
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The Angel Express pulled up outside of the arena, as the rabid Renegades booed the occupant as they stepped out. Tack Angel, Geoff Garrett, Saxon, and Novus. They made their way to the front door, where Renegade Security stood in the way.
Geoff Garrett: Whoa now, you can drop the guard there Slapcurity, we’re not here to cause trouble. However, if we WERE, I think the Red Shirts would trump the Renegades, am I right Slap Angel?
Tack Angel: …I don’t have an opinion.
Saxon: We’re not here to “invade” as it were. That’s not the Red Shirt way.
Novus: We bought tickets! We want to enjoy the show, as we scout our future opponents!
Geoff Garrett: That’s right, so take these tickets, step aside, and let’s get down to business. Hahaha. Come on Tack, walk this way! *Jackie Fargo struts inside*
Tack Angel: I’m not going to do that. I wish these people wouldn’t boo though. It’s just sports team mentality! No reason to get mean about it. I love them, I want to entertain them too! I hold no ill will towards anyone he-
Subculture: Hey! Look at that! It’s my Father-in-La-
Tack stomped on Subculture’s foot really hard as he walked by pretending to not notice him.
Subculture: AH! Darn! Darn! DARN!
“Skillet - Feel Invincible”
Tommy Dukes: Welcome to Havok! We’re in Onett of course, but DID YOU SEE THAT?!
Nerma: The Xciters are here! The Weekend Wrecking Crew have come to see the show and scout Samurai Ifrit from the looks of things. Of course, they’re going to have to sit back and take in a LOT of action, because man oh WOman did we not have some HUGE fallout from Demon Boogie!
Tommy Dukes: Paula, Darkness Aoi, and Mitra Lennox joined Metal Militia, as did GRIND, when he returned at the end of the Grindhouse match, which Trevor narrowly won by choking out Poo. That was the first big loss for the faction, and even then they had the last laugh. They are the size of a real militia at this point, and the invasion is stepping up! Tonight, they’re all over the place, and Paula herself, the Women’s World Champion, as something to say about matters.
Nerma: That’s right, but FIRST, we have the World Tag Team Championships on the line! Metal Militia are no longer just targeting Blood 4 Blood, they’re going after Samurai Ifrit, which shows they don’t intend to align with any like minded groups or people. It’s all or nothing, and that’s kicking things off right about….NOW!
EBW: Havok
Iwata Memorial Arena, Onett
ENT
1. World Tag Team Championships: Mike Thunder(c)/Isiah Muscle(c) vs. Hotlanta/Generator
-The stage was set for a thrilling and hard-hitting battle as the World Tag Team Championships hung in the balance. In one corner stood the reigning champions, Mike Thunder and Isiah Muscle, collectively known as Samurai Ifrit. Their opponents, Hotlanta and Generator of Metal Militia, were determined to dethrone them. As the match began, the fans were torn between the two teams. Who to cheer for? Samurai Ifrit, with their strength and resilience, clashed with the explosive combination of strength and agility that Metal Militia brought to the table. The early exchanges were a testament to the intensity of the contest. Each team showcased their unique strengths, trying to gain the upper hand in the battle for supremacy. Isiah Muscle, known for his flashy force, bravado, and technical prowess, squared off against Hotlanta, the powerhouse of the opposition. As the match reached its climax, the two teams pushed themselves to the limit. Hotlanta and Generator's seamless teamwork was on full display as they executed a picture-perfect Total Elimination on Isiah Muscle, leaving him reeling. Meanwhile, Generator took flight, soaring over the ropes and crashing onto Mike Thunder on the outside, leaving the champion stunned. Inside the ring, Hotlanta capitalized on the opportunity, hoisting Isiah Muscle up for a devastating Brainbuster. He pulled the tights as the ref counted the 1-2-3! Metal Miltia claimed the win and World Tag Team Championships!
Winners: Hotlanta[o]/Generator via Brainbuster on Isiah Muscle -> Pin -> NEW World Tag Team Champions!
After the match, “Energy” began playing in the arena, as Sal Paradise and Boomtown came riding in on Sophia the 3rd. The Renegades were hyped, as they might witness yet another title change, but suddenly the tank was swarmed by w00t, Grind, Darkness Aoi, and Mitra Lennox, as Ness, Crono, and Paula walked by. The crowd began to boo as they joined Hotlanta and Generator in the ring to celebrate the title victory. Ness was handed a microphone, but he simply stared at Producer Steve as he slowly handed it over to Paula.
Paula: You know Ness was always at his best when he didn’t say a word. That’s not a slight against my husband, but a fact. He didn’t have to utter a single word when he, Poo, Jeff, and myself saved the world. He rallied us with his actions, because actions speak louder than words. I think we’ve made that point. Listen to your reaction, that point was definitely made. Come on people we’re “FROM HERE” This the house we built remember? That’s better. Cheer it up. You want to hear what Ness has to say though right? How about Crono? He doesn’t like to talk either. Luckily, you’ve got a bonafide psychic with the stick, and no, not in the demonic sense, so certain self righteous World Champions don’t throw a Satanic Panic fit. The question has been and continues to be “Why?” and while I think Poo made that clear, perhaps I can shed some light on the subject. EBW was built as a family friendly platform in which good could battle evil in the confines of a ring. Family values were important to us. That went out the window when a certain Trevor Mach was thrown through a wall…a wall of OUR house I’d like to remind you. We want back what belongs to us, and we can do that our way, but it’s poetic to give you a taste of your own medicine. Ness has a big heart, and so does Crono, but they both agree that something had to give. I saw it that way too. I saw who EBW was building as the fresh meat for the grinder, the same grinder that left Tali Mach in a wheelchair. Hey Tali, I have to give you credit for letting w00t live, but we found a more fitting punishment for him I think. He doesn’t get to get away with it. Actions have consequences. Punishment IS carried out. Our biggest mistakes were thinking we could walk away and leave it to the “next guys”. The “next guys” never had any intention of walking away. Years later, and on one show you have Trevor Mach, and on the other you have Tack Ang- actually look, he’s in the crowd RIGHT NOW! Everyone’s hero Tack Angel, the Pushpin Seraphim couldn’t even handle just being on one show!
Tack Angel: I DIDN’T REALLY WANT TO CO-
Paula: Save it! Ness is speaking to me right now. He’s telling me to tell you all that we’re going to fight for you, but we’re going to get our hands dirty in the process. We’re also going to savor the accolades and rewards we reap that we selflessly cast aside once before. We are also agreeing to a little change. Metal Militia was supposed to carry the spirit of the first dominant force that changed that course of EBW…but why honor that spirit, when we can just become that spirit once again. That is why, from here on out, Metal Militia will hereby be known as…
Paula: Metal Rush! WE ARE METAL RUSH! Oh, Grind has something he wants to say too. I can hear him loud and clear. He’s saying that he’ll see you again really soon…Trevor Mach. EBW IS GOING TO FEEL THE RUSH!
2. EBW Television #1 Contender Strikes Only: Crono vs. Fighter Daron
-Next up, a Strike's Only battle between Metal RUSH's Crono, the enigmatic and fierce striker, who stood across the ring from Fighter Daron, an absolute heat vacuum. As the bell rang, it was clear that this Strike's Only match would be an intense battle. From the opening bell, Crono wasted no time unleashing a barrage of strikes on his opponent. His fists and feet were like lightning, finding their mark with precision and power. Daron, on the other hand, seemed to struggle to find his footing in the contest. The crowd's reaction, or lack thereof, spoke volumes about Daron's performance. It was as if the audience couldn't quite connect with the enigmatic fighter, leaving him with an almost eerie silence surrounding his every move. Crono continued to dominate the match, his strikes landing with a resounding impact that echoed throughout the arena. His trademark Wind Slash back elbow caught Daron square in the jaw, sending shockwaves of pain through his body, dropping him in a TKO.
Winner: Crono via Wild Slash -> TKO
Tommy Dukes: Crono with the win, right after the announcement that Metal Militia has become Metal Rush! The Rush is back as it were, and no it’s not my favorite Prog Rock group of the 80’s either. It’s the real deal Metal Rush from the early days of EBW. The first several episodes of Xcite dealt with the group that were actually the ones that first removed the iconic hat from Trevor and revealed his face to the world. That of course set off a series of events that eventually brought Fenrir into the fold when we went into space, because-
Nerma: I think they get it, this group is not to be taken lightly. If you underestimated them before, get ready for a rude awakening. This is an all hands on deck situation!
Backstage
Trevor Mach was holding up a heavy bag as Picky Minch laid into it.
Trevor Mach: Hit it! Hit it harder! Watch out! I'll do it!
Picky Minch: You alright Trev?
Trevor Mach: You mean other than the fact that it looks like I made out with a cheese grater? No, I’m pretty far from alright Pick Man. No matter how much I try to let go of the past, it wants to haunt me. These d-bags think that I’m responsible for all their woes. I’m just like a really rad, good looking, and funny dude that likes to fight! Yes, I’ve been prone to shenanigans. Yes, I’ve been up to all sorts. However, I didn’t do anything specific to them. They sealed that wall at Ness’s place! Sure, you can still kind of see it, but he didn’t have to pay for it or anything!
Picky Minch: Grind might have a legitimate gripe considering the whole RJ Havok situation.
Trevor Mach: THAT….I’m not proud of…but they had already split up, and he was the one that dumped HER! Besides, that worked out for him, cause she LOST IT!
Picky Minch: Trevor, you’re a contentious man. You’re a source of conflict. That’s just in your nature. However, you’re also a loyal friend, and a good family man. We’ve had our dust ups too, and even now you still text me funny memes at three in the morning like we were never at each other’s throats. I mean Ness and I were neighbors for YEARS and he barely talks to me!
Trevor Mach: To be fair he barely talks to anyone, but-
Picky Minch: You’ve got faith too, and that’s a powerful and inspiring thing. Don’t doubt the path you’re on. They want a fight, and we’re going to give it to them. They say people don’t believe in heroes anymore. I say to heck with that! Let’s give ‘em back their heroes!
Trevor Mach: …That sounded very 80’s…very rad….AND convincing. I like it! Haha!
Picky Minch: w00t is going to wish you finished him off after I’m through with him tonight. Just watch! Metal Rush. They fired the first shot, you fired back, and now I’m taking aim for my shot. BANG!
Samurai Ifrit Locker Room
Zyro Kurogane smashed the lockers while Seto Kaiba looked at his card deck in disappointment. Isiah Muscle held back his anger, while Mike Thunder was lifting weights to deal with his loss.
Zyro Kurogane: WE are supposed to be the driving force behind Havok! WE have the World Team Championship Rings! WE HAD the World Tag Team Championships! Mike! Isiah! What happened out there?!
Mike Thunder: Hottie and Generator know my style all too well. I forgot who I was dealing with for a minute, and that’s all it took. That makes the STRONG TITS MAD TITS! UUUUUUU!!!
Isiah Muscle: We need a rematch! I DEMAND a rematch! I don’t want Sal or Boomtown involved either!
Seto Kaiba: We have more pressing matters to deal with. The invaders are at the gates. The filthy peasants from the south want the elite prizes in the sport. They want our Rings. They want The Storm. I didn’t join this group to watch it fall to them….OR…to the novelty act. Mike, you’re of that generation, but you learned to get with the times. You’re a modern day renaissance man….plus you have money…and that’s what really matters. This team is the elite of the now, and they are the army of yesterday. Are we going to allow the hicks or “Metal Rust” to get in our way?
Zyro Kurogane: ABSOLUTELY NOT! Whoever gets in our way, we’re gonna LET IT RIP! We’ll tear through them or my name isn’t ZYRO-K! BEY-BEEEEEEY!
3. Bushido Rules Singles: Boz vs. Dougie Mach
-The tension in the air was palpable as Boz and Dougie Mach prepared to step into the squared circle for a Bushido Rules Match. Both competitors were no strangers to the harsh and unforgiving nature of this contest, where there were no rope breaks and leaving the ring resulted in an automatic loss. As the match got underway, Boz and Dougie wasted no time in engaging in a fierce exchange of strikes and holds. The two wrestlers, both known for their technical prowess, were locked in a battle of skill and strategy. On the outside of the ring, Rhea Rampage looked on, supporting her Doug Doug. Little did she know that danger lurked nearby. Heather Mach, with a devious plan in mind, made her way to the ringside area, biding her time. Inside the ring, Boz managed to catch Dougie in a vulnerable position, applying the STF submission hold. The pressure on Dougie's neck and limbs was excruciating, and his options were limited due to the Bushido Rules that governed the match. Just as Dougie was on the verge of tapping out, Heather Mach struck, targeting Rhea Rampage. The distraction was enough to pull Dougie's attention, and quickly tapped so as to try and fend off his cousin Heather. Boz with the win.
Winner: Boz via STF -> Submission
Tommy Dukes: The enigmatic Boz with another victory. He’s on a bit of a streak so far, while Dougie is on the other end of that, losing every match since returning. To be fair he tapped to try and save Rhea this time, although that much taller, more muscle bound woman seems to be doing just fine on her own.
Nerma: The knight in shining armor thing gets a bad rap. Women don’t want to be treated like objects that need everything done FOR them, but at the same time I think it’s nice to show that you care. What a minefield relationships are huh?
Tommy Dukes: I’m still wondering how WE ended up together.
Nerma: I like your bald head.
Tommy Dukes: Oh right.
In the crowd
The Weekend Wrecking Crew were sitting in the cramped seats, surrounded by people pelting them with popcorn.
Tack Angel: *sigh* Can I AT LEAST get a bucket? I’m gonna try and catch some of this popcorn. I didn’t eat today. Tacky no snaky is NO GOOD. I-
Makoto Kino: Tack? Oh there you are!
Tack Angel: Makoto? *blush* What are you doing here?
Makoto Kino: We uh…travel together…in the same bus?
Tack Angel: Oh right!
Makoto Kino: I thought maybe…you’d like some nicer company, since everyone seems to be really negative right now.
Tack Angel: I would LOVE some company, yes.
Makoto Kino: I know that it’s a rival brand, but you’re Tack Angel! You’re a hero! They don’t remember John Tack? They don’t remember Journey?
Tack Angel: I’m trying NOT to remember Journey myself.
Makoto Kino: Oh right! *blush* I’m so sorry.
Tack Angel: Got to get that match with CP Munk…and get out of the match with-
Geoff Garrett: Hey hey Slappy, look what I got! A big foam Blood 4 Blood fist, just for you, since we’re both good pals with Trevor Mach! A little cross promotional goodwill eh?
Tack Angel: Gee…thanks. I-
Suddenly, someone chucked a beer into Tack’s lap.
Tack Angel: Whoa! Hey! Whoa! Who did that?
?: IT WAS ME! PAT MUSTARD! I HATE YOU TACK ANGEL!
Tack Angel: HEY! You’re the guy that said those mean things about me at Demon Boogie! What the heck!? I was just winning a match! Grrr…Pat Mustard!
4. Singles: Picky Minch vs. w00t
-Next up, a Blood 4 Blood versus Metal Rush bout, as Picky Minch prepared to face off against the devious and unpredictable w00t. Picky Minch, known for his ground-and-pound style, was a solid, determined force in the ring, frustrated with a series of losses against Metal Rush. In contrast, w00t, under the influence of the Tanooki Suit, displayed an unsettling level of eccentricity. Despite w00t's erratic behavior, Picky Minch remained focused on the task at hand. He expertly dodged w00t's unconventional attacks and maintained his ground. In a sudden turn of events, Picky Minch capitalized on a moment of vulnerability. He pushed off a wKo attempt, leading to w00t attempting to rip the suit off once again. Picky shot behind him and with impressive strength and technique, he hoisted w00t into the air, performing a picture-perfect Hagen Suplex. He bridged w00t's shoulders to the mat, and in a huge upset scored the 1-2-3!
Winner: Picky Minch via Bridging Hagen Suplex -> Pin
Tommy Dukes: A huge upset! Picky Minch with the pin on w00t! He just beat a former MULTI-TIME World Champion!
Nerma: I always knew Picky was World Champion material, and that’s how you shake off a streak of losses to the opposition, but HERE COMES METAL RUSH!
Tommy Dukes: Little Mac is standing in the way, but it looks like they’re just there to grab w00t out of the ring. Hotlanta and Generator are laughing about what happened. They must have little regard for how they treat w00t. Who knows just to what lengths these guys are going to go to make their point!
Backstage
Blood 4 Blood were celebrating as Picky Minch came through the curtain, with Trevor hoisting him up, only to gently drop him as he clutched his bandaged sides.
Trevor Mach: GAH! MY GRIND INJURIES!
Hotlanta: You think that’s bad, the REAL Grind ain’t had a piece yet!
Hotlanta, Generator, and Grind walked through the curtain, as w00t skipped around, seemingly against his will.
Hotlanta: Grind has been spending his time in Anahauc and Edo, getting better and better. Like the rest of us, my dude spent his time thinking about striking back when the time was right, and Trev….the time is right.
Trevor Mach: You think that scares me? I love a fight! I’m glad you’re better! Good! Bring it on! That’s what we’re here for! Grind…dude…I did not ever mean to start a war with you over a gir-
Grind: THIS ISN’T ABOUT THAT!
Trevor Mach: Oh he’s speaking!
Grind: This is about you standing in my way at the crucial moment when I was breaking through! I was popular, I was unique, and I was in your way! You couldn’t have it! The Fire and Lightning Ladder Match, that was the day I realized deep down that I’d have to put you away, if I was ever going to reach my full potential. It was time to stop the pipe dreams, and get serious, but I mean hey…just cause it’s business…doesn’t mean I don’t have…pleasure.
Suddenly, a figure appeared out of the shadows behind Grind and wrapped her slender, scarred arm around Grind’s waist.
Ripper Jane: Reunited…and it feels SOOOOO good. Hahaha!
Trevor Mach: Oh come on! You just said it WASN’T about her!
Grind: It’s not, because that wrong has been righted….many many ti-
Trevor Mach: Alright skater dude, I’m thrilled for ya, but I don’t need to hear about it! I’m the World Champion. If you want a match, then step up! GET IN LINE! I’ll take you out! Hotlanta, I’ll take you down too! As for you, I don’t know you , but I’m sure you’re a jerk!
Generator: I’m Generator! We’ve had matches before!
Subculture: Man, they really don’t like you!
Trevor Mach: YEAH, I NOTICED!
5. Lady Renegades Singles: Lainey Strong vs. Darkness Aoi
-Next up, Lady Renegades action, as Lainey Strong, the determined and fierce competitor, stepped into the ring to face off against the formidable Darkness Aoi. Lainey was known for her tenacity and had a personal score to settle, seeking payback on behalf of her best friend, Wendy Mustang, after the mind games Metal Rush had played with her concerning the Women's World Championship. As the match began, Lainey wasted no time in taking control of the contest. She launched a relentless offensive assault on Darkness Aoi, utilizing a combination of powerful strikes and high-impact maneuvers. Lainey's motivation to stand up for her friend fueled her as she dominated the early moments of the match. Darkness Aoi, however, was no pushover. She had made a name for herself in the world of professional wrestling as a fierce and unyielding competitor. She came back hard with a harsh Spinebuster, but Lainey avoided the Darkness Bomber attempt and came off the ropes with a Lariat of her own. As Lainey continued to assert her dominance, Darkness Aoi found herself on the defensive, struggling to counter Lainey's relentless onslaught. Just as it seemed Lainey was on the cusp of securing a decisive victory, chaos erupted in the ring. Paula and Mitra, members of Metal Rush, stormed the squared circle and ambushed Lainey. DQ win for Lainey as the crowd booed Paula and tossed trash into the ring as she trapped the daughter of Mayor Strong in a Sharpshooter.
Winner: Lainey Strong via DQ
Paula: My my my, the little wannabe thought she could step up. That’s good, I’d like to see you at least try! Failure builds character. Don’t go on X and complain about it. Don’t whine to management either. You step up if you want a shot at the World Champion, and you earn it. THAT is what it’s supposed to be about, but these skanks and idiots and can’t seem to figure that ou-
Suddenly, Hope Mach rushed out with a chair, followed by a limping Wendy Mustang, and Dem Girlz. They ran Paula, Aoi, and Mitra out of the ring. Hope pointed at Paula, and then made a motion for the belt being around her waist, a challenge from the deaf Mach daughter to the Women’s World Champion.
?
In a dark room, Ilya Fedorovich was punching a solid wall. Blood was left on the wall as he began to rewrap his fists and turned to the camera.
Ilya Fedorovich: Yes…keep your eyes on the big distraction Eaglandski. Ignore the coming threat stalking you. Subculture, I will have what is mine. That title will be my prize…and your blood will be my trophy. We’ve only just begun. DO YOU HEAR ME?! AHAHAHA! WE’VE ONLY JUST BEGUN!
Ilya began to laugh uncontrollably, before he suddenly snapped and punched the wall so hard it actually cracked.
Gamer Girlz Room
Alison Chains was watching a video on her phone as Christy Angel played Fortnite.
Christy Angel: This game is fun. One time I was playing against Uncle Trevor. I could tell because his hands twitched and he could barely function. The fact that he’s won ANY games really says more about who he played against. Right Alison? Alison?
Alison Chains: I’m watching the revival of Slayer during Demon Boogie. I’ve been staring directly into the eyes of Slayer. Even though it’s a video…I feel like….he’s possessing me….urging me to kill…specifically people I don’t like though. I’m totally possess-
Christy Angel: No you’re not. Stop it.
Alison Chains: Oh. I guess you’re right. Thanks Christina.
Christy Angel: I’m Christy! NOT Christina!
Alison Chains: Uh-huh. I’m going to play my favorite game. It’s called nap roulette. I take this mystery pill and take a nap. I’m not setting an alarm. Will it be twenty minutes or four hours? Nobody knows. It’s risky, and I like it.
Christy Angel: Last time you played that game, you slept for three days.
Alison Chains: Yeah…but that was a different pill. That one was pink…this one is yellow.
Christy Angel: What is it?
Alison Chains: It’s uh…it’s….it’s yellow.
Christy Angel: How about we just play Five Nights at Saturn’s instead, and that way I don’t have to spend three days making sure you don’t swallow your tongue.
Alison Chains: But I don’t wanna!
Christy Angel: Fine! Then I’m gonna let Va-The Rizzler change you when you mess yourself.
Alison Chains: …Think he’d do it?
Christy Angel: He’d be INTO it.
Alison Chains: ….
Christy Angel: ALISON!
Alison Chains: I’m thinking!
Christy Angel: *gags*
Alison Chains: Fine! I’ll play the game! We ARE gamers who game, so pass me some gamer juice.
Christy Angel: You got it!
Kid Havok: Ladies…shouldn’t you be…ya know…fighting the good fight against Metal Rush? Maybe challenging Aoi and Mitra, or-
Christy Angel: Video games.
Kid Havok: Video games?
Alison Chains: Video games.
Kid Havok: ….Video games.
Alison Chains: …If I said I was genderfluid and had sex with a dude, would he be gay if I suddenly decided to switch genders during sex?
Christy Angel: Genderfluid doesn’t exist.
Alison Chains: Oh right…do I exist?
Kid Havok: Yes.
Alison Chains: Then why can’t feel my hand?
Kid Havok: You’ve been sitting on it for a long time.
Alison Chains: Oh THAT’S where I put it. Kids, it’s easy to misplace things, but sometimes you just have to ask help from your friends!
Kid Havok: The kids don’t exist.
Alison Chains: They did at one point, and their ghosts are haunting me until I solve the murder mystery!
Christy Angel: I really just want to play this game.
Alison Chains: Yes! Let’s do that instead!
6. Singles: Ness vs. Cade Yaggis
-Main event time as the Renegades were on the edge of their seats, eager to witness a colossal showdown between two titans of the squared circle: Ness and "Trigger" Cade Yaggis. Cade had long considered Ness his mentor, and this match was a culmination of their relationship, a battle that would determine who stood as the superior competitor with the looming shadow of Metal Rush hanging overhead. The opening moments of the match were filled with a palpable tension as both competitors circled one another, wary of the other's abilities. Ness, the seasoned silent veteran, had honed his skills to perfection over the years, while Cade, the fiery protege, was determined to prove himself by surpassing his mentor. The action in the ring was fast-paced and hard-hitting, with both Ness and Cade exchanging strikes and high-impact maneuvers. The crowd roared with every nearfall, as Cade came agonizingly close to securing the victory on multiple occasions. His Cadebreaker finisher was a constant threat, and he executed it with precision, leaving Ness on the brink of defeat. Ness, however, was not ready to yield the spotlight to his protege. He dug deep, summoning his resilience and experience to kick out of the Cadebreaker, much to the shock of the crowd. The momentum in the match shifted as Ness began to mount a comeback. As the match reached its climax, the crowd was on their feet, witnessing a classic encounter between teacher and student. Ness unleashed his devastating PK Rockin', a move that had carried him to countless victories throughout his career. The impact was thunderous, and the hometown crowd counted along with the referee. 1-2-3! Ness with the narrow victory over "Trigger" Cade Yaggis.
Winner: Ness via PK Rockin’ -> Pin
After the match, Cade tried to shake Ness’ hand, only for Paula to roll into the ring and slap him across the face.
Paula: YOU! We took you in! We trained you! Ness and Poo BOTH looked after you, and this is the thanks we get?! Typical of a “Renegade” with “Renegade” behavior. That’s the issue. That’s what I can’t stand. THAT is why I’m Metal Rush, and you…will be an example of what happens when you turn your back on values and hospitality. You turned your back on us, so we’re turning our back on you.
Ness and Paula turned as Grind, Hotlanta, Generator, and w00t rushed the ring and attacked Cade. The rest of Blood 4 Blood came out, and finally Crono joined the fracas. It was free for all of Blood 4 Blood vs. Metal Rush to end the show.
Last edited by Machismo (11/08/2023 9:55 am)
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Ted Pettentool: Whoa! Hey there Xciters and Renegades! The Tool Man here with a big EBW World exclusive for ya! But first off, I just got to say that this edition of EBW World is brought to you by Pizza X! Gotta be, gotta be Pizza X! I just love Pizza X, and I think everyone else should have some delicious Pizza X!
Producer Steve: *whispering off camera* You have to say it one more time.
Ted Pettentool: Oh? Uh…Pizza X! So wow, after a week of crazy action in EBW, we have another shot being fired by one Darius Grouch. “The Rumble” has decided he doesn’t want to share all of the special events with Xcite, and has decided that Havok will be putting on its own show. Next weekend the Havok Brand will “Feel the Rush!” on ENT+! It starts with a World Tag Team Championship Ladder match! The new champs in Metal Rush will defend against former champs Mike Thunder and Isiah Muscle of Samurai Ifrit, BUT they will also have LoveBoom! In the match! Sal and Boomtown didn’t even need to turn in their tag title VIP card! We go from the men to the Lady Renegades, as Aoi and Mitra put up their World Tag Team Championships against Dem Girlz! Then, we have a match I didn’t think we’d see. Ness has accepted a challenge thrown down by Zyro Kurogane of Samurai Ifrit. I don’t really know WHO I would want to win that match all things considered! Then, we have Subculture accepting a challenge of his own. Ilya Fedorovich wanted a Strikes Only Television Championship match, and that is what he’s going to get. Then, we have a 6-Man Elimination WAR! Metal Rush vs. Blood 4 Blood. It’s Grind, Crono, and w00t taking on World Champion Trevor Mach, Picky Minch, and Cade Yaggis. Our main event was just signed before the broadcast, as Paula will defend her Women’s World Championship against Hope Mach. They had THIS to say at the signing!
”The Rumble’s” Office
Darius Grouch: Alright ladies, the match is set. I tend to prefer more time to build a match of this caliber, but I respect the anger I’m seeing here, and I want to capture that. It’s going to be entertaining for me as well.
Hope Mach: *signing and talking* You’re out of line Paula. I used to respect you, and now I just want to make you tap out.
Paula: Heh. Kid…and you ARE still just a kid, I don’t care how long you’ve been around. You need to lis- no you can’t listen. I’d tell you to clean your ears, but that wouldn’t matter would it? Look at me…read my lips. We’re very serious about what we have to do here, and even though I respect you the most out of your cursed family, I intend to make an example out of you, just like you were making an example out of the slacker girls you share those Senshi belts with! You’re STILL wet behind your useless ears. Heh.
Darius Grouch: You turned your back when you said some of that Paula. She can’t-
Paula: Oh, she heard me. She heard every word. Remember who your World Champion is.
Darius Grouch: Heh.
Hope Mach: …..
EBW: Feel the Rush! [Havok Event]
Iwata Memorial Arena, Onett
ENT+
1. World Tag Team Championship Ladder: Hotlanta(c)/Generator(c) vs. Sal Paradise/Boomtown vs. Mike Thunder/Isiah Muscle
2. Women’s World Tag Team Championships: Darkness Aoi(c)/Mitra Lennox(c) vs. Jenny James/Jessy James
3. Singles: Ness vs. Zyro Kurogane
4. EBW Television Championship Strikes Only: Subculture(c) vs. Ilya Fedorovich
5. 6-Man Elimination Tag: Grind/Crono/w00t vs. Trevor Mach/Cade Yaggis/Picky Minch
6. Women’s World Championship: Paula(c) vs. Hope Mach
Ted Pettentool: Insane right? Is that psychic stuff real? We’ll leave it up to you! President Swift, not to be outdone, announced his own branded event, called “Rise, Roar, Revolt” which will take place in….DALAAM! That’s right, the Xcite Brand is going overseas to the HUGE Rajamouli Stadium, where a sure to be packed crowd will see some amazing action. Makoto Kino will take on 3Queen’s uh…maid? Bellerophon…whatever her role may be. Then, the CXJ Championship will be on the line as Johnny Starbound reluctantly defends against Kiva. Starbound said some very untrue things to try and damage a division he’s the champion of. Kiva is there to defend the honor of the newly reborn division. Then, we have a DREAM MATCH people! Get ready for this one, because it’s a doozy I never thought I’d see! Tack Angel will defend the EBW Mars Championship against the former champion and his CURRENT EBW Tag Team Champion partner Geoff Garrett. Jackson Kain gave Double G the shot, and THAT has paid off, more on that later. After that, a majority of the Xcite roster will battle it out in the RRR Cup Battle Royale! After that, Erica of 3Queens will put her title on the line against Usagi Tsukino, who challenged Erica after what she did to Makoto. The main event will see Rama Raju face his toughest test yet. He’s been challenged by Troy, Jackson Kain, and Colby Roads. When we asked him which one he wanted to fight, his response was “Yes”. It’s a No Rule 4-Way for the EBW Championship! The local hero will have the might of his nation behind him, but will it be enough? That show is coming the week AFTER “Feel the Rush!” so I really hope you got both premium services. This stuff gets expensive. *sigh*
EBW: Rise Roar Revolt [Xcite Event]
Rajamouli Stadium, Dalaam
ENN+
1. Women’s Singles: Makoto Kino vs. Bellerophon
2. Xcite EBW CXJ Championship: Johnny Starbound(c) vs. Kiva
3. Xcite EBW Mars Championship: Tack Angel(c) vs. Geoff Garrett
4. RRR Cup Battle Royale: Tower vs. Bashin Dan vs. Magnum PT vs. Brother Tiburon vs. Rey Dorado vs. Sabre vs. Jammer vs. Turbo vs. Point Man vs. Razorblade vs. Brunson Burner vs. Snakebite vs. Mav Valentine vs. Rains vs. Blue Rains
5. Xcite EBW Women’s Championship: Erica(c) vs. Usagi Tsukino
6. Xcite EBW Championship No Rules: Rama Raju(c) vs. Troy vs. Jackson Kain vs. Colby Roads
Ted Pettentool: Well there you have it. It’s going to be an amazing couple of weeks for-
?: Yo, hold up Tedster, we’re just getting started here.
Ted Pettentool: Huh? Who are you?
A man with slicked back black hair and thick framed glasses waltzed onto the set. He was wearing an ascot and drinking a martini.
?: The party is just getting started with me…Russ Nightlife baby.
Ted Pettentool: Russ Nightlife?
Russ Nightlife: That’s right, I’m your new co-host.
Ted Pettentool: What about Ninten?
Russ Nightlife: On vacay with the main squeeze.
Ted Pettentool: Good News Gary? Mrs. Xtra?
Russ Nightlife: Relax broheim, and take a chill pill. Russ Nightlife’s got what you need. We’re a call in show now. Call in at the number below, and chat it up with Russ.
Ted Pettentool: Wait what?
Russ Nightlife: Looks like we got a call. You’re on with Russ Nightlife.
The Rizzler: *on the phone* Hello? Is this Russ Nightlife! I actually got through! WOW!
Ted Pettentool: Rizzler? You’re on staff man. You could talk to us anytime you want.
The Rizzler: *on the phone* No, I mean I managed to actually dial correctly. It’s tough going getting my hand to work after it was severed and degloved. You’d think it would make me reevaluate my life…but that sounds like work and I’d rather not.
Russ Nightlife: What can Russ do for ya caller?
The Rizzler: *on the phone* Could you let Jammer know we’re out of cheese at the house? I’ve been trying to call him, but I think he accidentally blocked my number or something! Just let him know for me please? Thanks.
Russ Nightlife: Alright, that was our first caller, and now-
Ted Pettentool: Hey wait a minute!
Russ Nightlife: We’re onto the next caller. Hello, you’re on with Russ baby.
Pat Mustard: *on the phone* Hello? I’m on? Good, cause I’ve got a lot to say about Tack Angel! That scumbag! How DARE he betray his good friend like that! He’s not cool like you Russ! You have boundless charismaaaa.
Ted Pettentool: Huh? Do you know hi-
Russ Nightlife: So you called to talk about Tack Angel. People love him. He’s a hero. What’s with the hate my dude?
Pat Mustard: I am a sworn enemy of Tack Angel! I wish he were DEAD for stabbing Geoff Garrett in the back like that! Am I the only one who notices things! HE HATES GEOFF GARRETT! HE HATES THE WEEKEND WRECKING CREW! HE HATES THE SOUTH AND HE HATES MULLETS! *deep breath*
Russ Nightlife: That can’t be true my man. Tack Angel is cool as a cucumber. The dude drives around in a bus with his bros and a cadre of pretty ladies. He’s making the most of his divorce, and that driver of his Rick Shaw really ties it all together. Dude is on cloud 9.
Pat Mustard: Grrr! I refuse to believe it…and yet…I can’t argue with your charismaaaaa.
Ted Pettentool: Why does he keep saying it like tha-
Russ Nightlife: Well that about does it for us here right Ted? Right. Peace out.
Ted Pettentool: What was that? *sigh* It is true…he does in fact have boundless charismaaaaa.
The Mach Farm - Smalltown
Trevor sat on his front porch, distraught over the scene playing out in front of him, as Dougie Mach tried to keep Heather and Rhea from killing each other.
Trevor Mach: You guys…I really don’t have time for-
Dougie Mach: TREVOR HELP ME!
Trevor Mach: Not happening.
Rhea Rampage: LET ME GET HER DOUG DOUG! I PROMISE TO LET HER LIVE MAYBE!
Heather Mach: OH YOU THINK YOU COULD DO IT HUH? LOVE TO SEE YOU TRY YOU TRASH BAG WHORE! Dougie, did you have to have change for a ten to get a date on Saturday night?
Rhea Rampage: NOW I’M KILLING YOU!
Dougie Mach: AH!
Trevor Mach: It’s times like this I wonder how my old buddy Tackleton is doing.
Valentine Park
CP Munk was standing around, enjoying the fall air, and waiting for others to leave so he could start foraging for acorns, when suddenly Tack Angel rushed up behind him and kicked him between the legs.
CP Munk: GAH!
Tack Angel: GIVE ME A MATCH!
CP Munk: AAAHH!
Tack Angel: GIVE ME THE MATCH!
CP Munk: YOU’RE CRAZY!
Tack Angel: GIVE IIIIT!
CP Munk: AHH!
Tack Angel: GET BACK HERE!
The Mach Farm - Smalltown
Trevor Mach: I bet he’s kicking CP Munk in the balls right about now. That sounds fun. I’m just gonna…walk away…cause they don’t even notice…that I’m doing sooooo.
Trevor crept off into the house, but was startled to see a figure sitting in the room with Tali.
Trevor Mach: Whoa! We have company…I mean other than the freeloaders?
Tali Mach: Yeah…says he wanted to meet you.
Trevor Mach: A lot of people want to meet me…to punch me mostly.
Dr. Yaggis: That won’t be me I assure. I am Dr. Yaggis! Dr. George Yaggis.
Trevor Mach: Huh…that name.
Dr. Yaggis: Named after my adopted father actually, and-
Trevor Mach: I mean the last name. You’re-
Dr. Yaggis: Cade’s Dad, that’s right.
Trevor Mach: Alright then, I can see why Tali didn’t immediately shoot you when you came to the door.
Tali Mach: Don’t worry…I use paintball pellets…most of the time.
Dr. Yaggis: Oh. I uh…I just wanted to talk…with you about Cade…and well everything.
Trevor Mach: Sure! Welcome to the fa-
As Trevor shook hands with Dr. Yaggis he stuttered and fell back a little.
Dr. Yaggis: Are you alright Trevor?
Trevor Mach: J-Just a weird weird feeling of dijon mustard.
Tali Mach: Deja vu.
Trevor Mach: Yeah that.
The two walked and talked outside as Dougie continued to keep Rhea and his cousin at bay.
Dr. Yaggis: Quite lively here isn’t it?
Trevor Mach: So much for quiet time.
Dr. Yaggis: So how is Cade doing?
Trevor Mach: Are you two on the outs or something?
Dr. Yaggis: It’s best that I keep my distance. Let’s just put it that way.
Trevor Mach: Huh. That’s not cryptic or anything.
Dr. Yaggis: Is he fitting in with your team alright?
Trevor Mach: Heh. It’s funny talking to you like this. It’s like a PTA meeting. He’s rad Doc. Just the other day I had him over for a funny prank. We took pictures of me pulling Truth out of a “spaceship” we made in the cornfield, and one day she’s going to “accidentally” find them in the attic. Teehee!
Dr. Yaggis: …So you’re getting along. That’s good. I guess I really want to know WHY you chose my son to join you?
Trevor Mach: Oh…well that’s harder to explain. He’s got all the talent in the world, so it’s a no brainer on that level but…something more. I just had this feeling…like I needed to watch out for him.
Dr. Yaggis: I see. When you see me…how does it make you feel?
Trevor Mach: Like we’ve met before honestly. Maybe we have. I take a lot of blows to the head. “Trigger” is Blood 4 Blood, and we’ve got his back. Don’t worry about that.
Dr. Yaggis: …You’re really going to prank your own daughter like that?
Trevor Mach: …It’s funny right?
The conversation continued as Dr. Yaggis began to head towards a black car parked down the road.
Dr. Yaggis: Well, I’d better be going, but it was good to talk to you. Thank you for your time.
Trevor Mach: It beat what I was dealing with.
Dr. Yaggis: You’re a good man, and I appreciate you looking out for my son.
Trevor Mach: “Trigger” is a beast. He’s looking out for me if anything.
Dr. Yaggis: I just have one more question, and it’s going to sound weird. Do you ever have moments where to feel intense pain….or feel…intensely powerful?
Trevor Mach: Uh…that IS a weird question, but I guess you’re a Doctor. I get this sort of stuff from Jeff and Degrees all the time. I guess I could say I DO feel pain…and pain makes me pray, but prayer makes me feel powerful. Does that make sense?
Dr. Yaggis: It does actually. Thank you for your time.
Trevor Mach: That was…odd.
Dr. Yaggis stepped into the car, where he joined Grimoire and Gordon Cole.
Dr. Yaggis: He doesn’t remember, but he’s trying to.
Gordon Cole: IT’S BETTER OFF THAT THEY DON’T LET THEM HAVE A SOMEWHAT NORMAL LIFE! EVEN THIS WAS A RISK!
Dr. Yaggis: I know, but talking to my son directly might have made it worse. We know what we need to know. The timeline has settled. It’s a better world, despite its many flaws.
Grimoire: Flaws? You mean like you not getting to see your son? That’s a big flaw. As someone who can only talk to his Dad on occasion, that one really doesn’t sit right with me.
Dr. Yaggis: It’s the price that needed to be paid. It’s alright. I’m happy knowing my son is happy, and he has the life he wanted before. We have all the intel we need on this case.
Gordon Cole: GOOD WORK GENTLEMEN! THE BIGGEST MYSTERY TO ME IS STILL WHERE FACE HAS GONE, BUT WE HAVE PRESSING MATTERS TO INVESTIGATE! NAMELY PROJECT G!
Offline
Saturn City Recording Studio
Tack Angel sat outside of the recording booth as Jackson Kain walked up to him.
Jackson Kain: There he is!
Tack Angel: *sigh* Hey Jackson.
Jackson Kain: What’s with that attitude man! This is a great gig I got you.
Tack Angel: It is, and I’m grateful, it was just a long trip on a bus with several people. Pat Mustard snuck aboard too, and I don’t really want to get into it.
Jackson Kain: Understood, but get this, you’re going to be doing some serious voice over work here. This was what I used to do between movie roles when I had to pay off my expensive and ridiculous lifestyle. That’s behind me now. Faris got me into piracy though, and that’s pretty cool.
Tack Angel: Wow, that Faris is quite the woman then huh? She seems nice.
Jackson Kain: Only until you make her mad brosef. That Makoto seems like the real deal too though.
Tack Angel: Everyone keeps saying that. What do they mean by it?
Jackson Kain: Dude…come on.
Tack Angel: Yeah yeah…I know. I have to focus on making the alimony payments right now…that are going to Tracy…who just divorced me…after cheating on me with my former good friend…to marry my “supposed'' good fr- *gags* tag partner Geoff Garrett.
Jackson Kain: Hey, look at it this way man. I’m sure somewhere out there is another you living it up with tons of beautiful women, and this guy's good fortune in no way, shape, or form would be responsible for your hard times...surely. Well see ya later!
Tack Angel: *turns to the camera* What did he mean by this?
Intercom: Tack Angel, could you come into the booth please?
Tack Angel: It’s Tack ti- no I’m not doing that. That’s terrible.
Tack went into the booth and looked through the soundproof glass to see two hipsters in neon clothing. One of them had a spindly mustache, and the other had a ridiculous soul patch.
?: *intercom on* Tack? Tack Angel?
Tack Angel: That’s me.
?: *intercom on* Great. I’m Eggs Bert, and I’ll be covering your recordings for the day.
Tack Angel: Eggs Bert? Uh…yeah sure. Nice to meet you. Happy to have the extra work.
Eggs Bert: *intercom on* Good…good. Now, this is going to be very simple. Just say it normally, and then we’ll do a small voice over at the end of the session.
Tack Angel: Alright.
?: *intercom on* Hello Tack? Can you hear me? It’s Clem Fandango.
Tack Angel: What?
Clem Fandango: *intercom on* It’s Clem Fandango. Can you hear me Tack?
Tack Angel: Yes, I hear you Clem Fandango.
Clem Fandango: *intercom on* If you could just say it normally, and then we’ll do a small voice over at the end of the session.
Tack Angel: …H-He just said that Clem Fanda- hey, they sort of sorts like Grim Fandango.
Clem Fandango: *intercom on* N-no, it’s Clem Fandango. Can you hear me Tack?
Tack Angel: YES! I can hear you Clem Fandango!
Eggs Bert: *intercom on* Alright Tack, let’s give it a go.
Tack Angel: *clears throat* Hey! Tack Angel here! Be sure to check out Xcite every week on ENN to see the very best in wrestling action! Featuring stars like myself, Christina Angel, Erica, Bashin Dan, Rama Raju, The Eagleland Gladiators, and G-G-Geoff Garrett!
Eggs Bert: *intercom on* That was great. Thanks Tack.
Tack Angel: I stuttered in there. You sure you don’t want me to do it again?
Eggs Bert: *intercom on* No, it’s great Tack. It’s one take great. We love it. We have some other things we’d like you to record for us though, if you don’t mind.
Tack Angel: O-oh yeah? I’d be getting paid?
Eggs Bert: *intercom on* Absolutely Tack.
Clem Fandango: *intercom on* Hello? Tack? Can you hear me? It’s Clem Fandango.
Tack Angel: Yes, I can hear you Clem Fandango.
Clem Fandango: *intercom on* We just need you to do a couple more things for us, and you will be getting paid for them.
Tack Angel: He just said that!
Eggs Bert: *intercom on* Alright, the first one is for the navy. They want an automated voice to sound when launching nuclear weapons.
Tack Angel: Excuse me? They want what? So that would be my voice? I don’t know if I want to be associated with that!
Eggs Bert: *intercom on* It pays really well.
Tack Angel: *sigh* I supposed I could rest assured that no one is stupid enough to ever actually launch one. Alright, I’ll do it. *clears throat* NUCLEAR WEAPONS FIRED!
Clem Fandango: *intercom on* Tack, this is Clem Fandango, can you hear me?
Tack Angel: …Yeah…yeah I can Clem Fandango.
Clem Fandango: *intercom on* That was good, but do you think you could try it again, but sound less alarming.
Tack Angel: …But it IS an alarm. I’ve just alerted everyone that nuclear weapons have been fired! I’ve just unleashed armageddon!
Clem Fandango: *intercom on* The feeling is you could do it in a way that’s a bit less…dramatic.
Tack Angel: ….*clears throat* Golly! The nuclear weapons were just fired! Oops!
Eggs Bert: *intercom on* Tack, that’s perfect. It’s absolutely perfect.
Tack Angel: WHAT?!
Eggs Bert: *intercom on* Alright Tack, this next one was meant for The Rizzler, but he couldn’t make it. The plan is to dub you over his work.
Tack Angel: How is that going to work?
Eggs Bert: *intercom on* Everyone seems to think you two sound almost identical, and he’s already given it the green light.
Tack Angel: We sound alike? I don’t know where that came from…but I need the money…alimony and what have you. *clears throat* Alright everybody, welcome back to “Rack Reactions?” We’ve got some big ones here on this woman in an olive green dress, but these ain’t no olives. These are more like Thanksgiving gourds, and these cornucopias are helping to broker peace between the native Saturns and the pilgrims. Shaq could draw a couple of hand turkeys on these things. It’s a slimming, form fitting dress that really draws the eye to these buffalo…that make me want to spew a buffa-load and- I CAN’T DO THIS! THIS IS AWFUL!
Eggs Bert: *intercom on* Tack, you were doing great man. It was perfect. You sounded just like him. The sleaze level was on point.
Tack Angel: It was?! But I don’t want-
Clem Fandango: *intercom on* Tack, it’s Clem Fandango, can you hear m-
Tack Angel: YES! I CAN HEAR YOU CLEM FANDANGO!
Clem Fandango: *intercom on* The sleaze level….was on point and-
Tack Angel: We’re done here!
Last edited by Machismo (11/11/2023 12:58 am)
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The Mach Farm - Smalltown
Tali Mach wheeled herself out of the house to watch as Justice and Truth chased Robo around the field, with their dogs following in tow. As she laughed, a figure appeared behind her.
?: It’s amazing how fast children grow.
Tali Mach: Huh? You…heh…I was starting to think you were dead. I haven’t seen you in a while. Yeah, they do grow fast don’t they?
?: I was talking about you.
Tali Mach: I’m no child anymore.
?: No…you’re not. I’m pleased with how you turned out.
Tali Mach: Oh yeah? Wheels and all?
?: The chair doesn’t define you. The fact that you didn’t let the crash kill you, and that you continue to live your life everyday…THAT has defined you…and I’m pleased to see that. I’m very proud of you.
Tali Mach: Is that why you came back?
?: I’m sorry I never had the chance to visit you in the hospital. It took some time for the news to get to me where I was. To see that w00t is still alive…shows a lot of growth in you too.
Tali Mach: According to Trevor, he said he wasn’t the only one in that car. I feel like I knew that once…just like I felt like you were dead. *shrugs* I’d really like to know who was in that car, BUT…I also want you to answer my question. WHY did you come back?
?: When one of my “other” students returned home to recover from some injuries sustained in a certain gruesome bout, I finally decided to tune in and see what I had been missing. I’d like your permission…to train her.
Tali Mach: …..
“Power Wolf - Sainted by the Storm”
Tommy Dukes: The Dukemeister here, and you’d better bust out your umbrella, because we’re heading into THE STORM! Haha! I’m riding solo this week, for what promises to be a fun night of action. The main event will see Samurai Ifrit’s Zyro Kurogane and Seto Kaiba take on “Trigger” Cade Yaggis and Picky Minch of Blood 4 Blood. Picky scored a huge upset win over w00t on Havok, and Cade was narrowly defeated by his mentor Ness, as the EBW OG was able to kick out of the Cadebreaker! So much to cover tonight as this raucous crowd checks out the matches here in Southtown! This city loves a good fight eh? You’re gonna get it on The Storm, which is STILL a Havok controlled show, and still RIGHT HERE on ENT, and we have to thank Samurai Ifrit for that. Come on everybody, say thank you with me. All together now. Tha- oh you’re not doing it.
EBW: The Storm[Havok Control]
Howlers Arena, Southtown
ENT
1. Tag: Sal Paradise/Boomtown vs. Dougie Mach/Fighter Daron
-The opening bout saw LoveBoom! take on the pairing of “Dynamic” Dougie Mach and “Heatless” Fighter Daron. Needless to say, Daron did not like his new moniker, but neither did Dougie, who had been trying to escape his “Dynamic” past and regain some of that former World Champion's fire. That wasn’t happening on this night, as Sal and Boomtown were so in sync, they made quick work of this team. Boomtown blasted Daron with a hard lariat on his way to fight off Dougie, as he tagged in the veteran Sal for the Perfect Sky and the pin on Daron. The Renegades loved the win, even if they refused to acknowledge the man Sal pinned.
Winners: Sal Paradise[o]/Boomtown via Perfect Sky on Fighter Daron -> Pin
Tommy Dukes: A win for LoveBoom! Sal Paradise and Boomtown are looking to upset Metal Rush, in that not only are they in the Feel the Rush Ladder Match for the World Tag Team Championships, but they still hold the VIP Card for a title match whenever they want!
Backstage
Hope Mach was encouraging a rabid and ferocious Jenny and Jessy James before they went out for their match. As they walked away, she suddenly felt a presence behind her, and quickly turned around, but not quick enough to stop the figure from...grabbing her nose and honking it.
Master Lu: Honk!
Hope Mach: *gasp* Uncle Lu!
Master Lu: Hello Hope. How is your lip reading these days?
Hope Mach: *signing and talking* Outstanding.
Master Lu: Good. I understand you’re engaged to Bashin Dan? Fine young man.
Hope Mach: *signing and talking* He’s the best! What are you doing here?
Master Lu: Actually…I’m here for you.
Hope Mach: Me?
-
Tommy Dukes: The Dukemeister is back, and we’re going to have more action on The Storm, coming up soon, but first, we’ve got some words from Zyro Kurogane of Samurai Ifrit, and we have some words from Ness of Meta- we do? We do NOT have words from Ness! I’m willing to be we don’t Steve!
Ness: …..
-
Zyro Kurogane: People are wondering WHY Zyro-K is challenging the mute leader of Metal Rush, and I think that’s obvious. He’s a rival, he’s a threat, and he's encroaching on MY brand! Ness, Metal Rush, oh, how cute that you think you're on my level. You see, I'm not just a wrestler; I'm a force of nature, a tidal wave of charisma and skill. Samurai Ifrit is not to make friends, but to make a statement. Havok belongs to me. I am the future, the present, and the undeniable truth of this brand. Ness, Metal Rush, take a step back because the spotlight is mine, and you're just living in it. Here's a little piece of advice for you both. Stay out of my way if you know what's good for you. This is my time, my ring, and I won't let anyone stand in the way of my dominance. Ness, Metal Rush, you're on notice. I’m gonna let it rip, cause I’m Zyro-K BEY-BEEEEEY!
-
Tommy Dukes: I told you Steve. You owe me twenty bucks. Those two are going to do battle at “Feel the Rush!” the first of the Havok exclusive special events!
2. Lady Renegades Tag: Jenny James/Jessy James vs. Lisa Limpet/Misty Mismatch
-The next match was scheduled to be a one sided lesson in beatdowns, as Dem Girlz, featuring the formidable Jenny James and Jessy James, stepped into the ring to face off against two locals eager for an opportunity to make an impression. The local job- enhan- talent, known as Lisa Limpet and Misty Mismatch, showed courage in the face of the experienced Dem Girls. The early moments of the match saw Lisa trying to use his speed against the power of Jessy, while Misty aimed to outmaneuver the striking prowess of Jenny. However, the experience and coordination of Dem Girlz quickly took control of the match. Jenny and Jessy seamlessly exchanged tags, isolating one of the job girls in their corner. The crowd could feel the dominance of Dem Girlz as they executed a series of double-team maneuvers, showcasing their tag team synergy. As the match progressed, Dem Girlz signaled the beginning of the end. A Springboard Doomsday Device from Jessy to Misty brought the match to a quick end.
Winners: Jenny James/Jessy James[o] via Springboard Doomsday Device on -> Pin
Tommy Dukes: Dem Girlz with the win, and I sure hoped they’d win this one! Misty Mismatch?! Come on!
Backstage
Mrs. Xtra: Mrs. Xtra here, and I’m trying to catch up to Dougie Mach, but he’s running around like a lost puppy looking for Rhea Rampage.
Dougie Mach: Hey! I heard that!
Mrs. Xtra: I call it like I see it!
Dougie Mach: I just need to cry with my head on her lap while she calls me Doug Doug, is that so wrong?
Mrs. Xtra: It speaks to a number of issues, but I guess it’s fine?
Dougie Mach: I lost…AGAIN! You know, when I came back to wrestling I figured I’d be able to get back to where I was. When Havok first started, I was the Havok World Champion. I was the history making Mach of the hour, but now I’m just back to being a joke! It was that killer instinct! I wasn’t a very nice guy! I don’t know if I have that in me anymore! That was the Mach Curse, and I don’t know if I can be that guy without, or if I’d even WANT to be! I’ll tell who HAS the Mach Curse right now, and it’s Heather! Trying to ruin my relationship! Trying to stop me from being happy! Rhea is going to bust her up if she’s not careful! I need to figure things out. I need to get my head on straight and refocus. I have a motto I’m going to follow. Heart And Might Always Strong! That’s right! HAMA- OOPS!
3. Bushido Rules Singles: Boz vs. Jack Schmidt
-In a Bushido Rules clash between enigmatic newcomer Boz and a local wrestler, the atmosphere in the arena was tense as the bell signaled the start of the match. Boz, known for his rugged demeanor and no-nonsense approach, faced off against the local talent, a determined corps- competitor named Jack Schmidt. Boz wasted no time in asserting his dominance. The rugged loner showcased his raw power and aggression, overwhelming Jack with a relentless barrage of strikes and powerful maneuvers. Jack, though resilient, found himself struggling against the sheer force and intensity of Boz's offense. Boz, with an air of indifference, targeted Jack's limbs, systematically breaking him down. The local wrestler attempted to mount a comeback, but Boz's relentless onslaught proved too much. Boz effortlessly countered Jack's moves, demonstrating his superior skill and experience. Boz locked in his signature submission hold, the STF. With a calculated and methodical approach, Boz cinched in the submission, wrenching back on Jack's neck and forcing him into excruciating pain. The local wrestler, realizing the inevitable, had no choice but to submit quickly.
Winner: Boz via STF -> Referee Stoppage
Tommy Dukes: Boz with another win! This grizzled loner is very proficient, and obviously hungry for a real challenge. He spoke to the World Champion a few weeks ago, and made it clear he’s looking for gladiators and titans to do battle with. Speaking of the World Champion though, we received a video from him regarding recent incidents with Metal Rush, and Grind, one of its newest members.
“Glitterwolf - Alana”
A video began to play of a sports car racing down a beachside road. The 80’s aesthetic gave away immediately who was inside of the Testarossa. The man pulled over along the side of the road, looking out over the beach and the sunset, as he took his shades off, with World Championship over his shoulder.
Trevor Mach: Peeps and rad dudes, my fellow wrestling enthusiasts, I stand before you not just as Trevor Mach, but as a man with a purpose, a man with a message. I've been silent...more or less...for far too long, and it's time to set the record straight. I've dedicated my life to the pursuit of excellence, both inside and outside this ring. And yes, I am a devout Christian. My faith guides me, inspires me, and it helps define me as a wrestler. I'm here to compete, to entertain, and to show the world just how rad this sport truly is. Now, I've been witness to the chaos that Metal Rush has unleashed upon this wrestling world. The aggression and the chaos. Normally, I live for that sort of thing, but this is all fueled by hatred and jealousy. It's not what wrestling should be about. Wrestling is a sport, with the code of the gladiator, the code of Bushido at play. I get the irony of some of this coming from me. That's why I'm not saying it while standing in Edo for example. I’ve been a bad guy. I have my history. It’s behind me. Don’t look for me in my past, because I don’t live there anymore. I am who I am now. People love the anti-establishment, but have you seen the world today? I’m as anti-establishment as you get. You want to rebel against the system? Buy a farm, grow your own food, get married and have kids. So, here's my message to Metal Rush, and specifically, Grind. I understand the history, the battles we've had, the animosity that has festered. But I'm here to tell you, Grind, I'm willing to put the past behind us. I want to compete, to showcase the best of wrestling for our fans. So, Grind, if you're listening, I'm extending an olive branch. Let's settle our differences in the ring, where it matters the most.
-
Tommy Dukes: Wow, that was a really…cheesy promo.
Trevor Mach: You think so?
Tommy Dukes: Ah!
Trevor Mach: I was being genuine.
Tommy Dukes: Trevor?! What are you doing here?
Trevor Mach: …I brought the video.
Tommy Dukes: Oh.
Trevor Mach: Cheesy though? Yeah, maybe it is, but I mean every word. I’m extending that olive branch. I’m giving Grind a chance here. *sigh*
Tommy Dukes: What is it?
Trevor Mach: I feel terrible.
Tommy Dukes: About the situation regarding Grind and Metal Rush?
Trevor Mach: Huh? No, all I’ve eaten today is a bunch of croissants.
Tommy Dukes: Oh. Well you look great!
Trevor Mach: …I feel awful on the inside, but hey, it’s not my fault they haven’t put the past behind them. I’m giving them the chance. We have to let the past go.
Tommy Dukes: What’s something you’d change though?
Trevor Mach: I’d rather be 6’5 instead of 6’4.
Tommy Dukes: I meant regarding them, but you’re 6’4?
Trevor Mach: No, I’m 6’1, but I’d rather be 6’5.
4. Singles: Ilya Fedorovich vs. Pirate Bill
-The next match saw Pirate Bill take on Ilya Fedorovich in singles action. Pirate Bill, adorned in his pirate-themed attire, taunted Ilya with exaggerated gestures and playful antics. Ilya, however, remained stoic, focused on the task at hand. The opening moments saw Bill attempting to outmaneuver his larger opponent with quick footwork and agility. Ilya, standing tall and unyielding, absorbed Bill's high-energy offense. With a sudden burst of strength, Ilya caught Pirate Bill mid-air as he attempted a flying crossbody, showcasing his raw power. As the match progressed, Ilya asserted his dominance, utilizing a combination of devastating strikes and powerful grapples. His relentless offense wore down Pirate Bill, who found himself struggling against the sheer force of Ilya's onslaught. Ilya showcased his technical prowess, executing impactful suplexes and bone-crushing slams. The crowd marveled at the strength and precision displayed by the foreign menace, who seemed determined to make a statement in the ring. Pirate Bill was the favorite of the Renegades, but Ilya crushed their hopes and Bill's, with a stunning KO Punch that dropped Bill like a sack of Pirate loot. 1-2-3. A win for Ilya Fedorovich on the board.
Winner: Ilya Fedorovich via KO Punch -> Pin
Tommy Dukes: Wow! Ilya using your boy’s finisher as his own. What a statement right there!
Trevor Mach: That was as shocking as a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM.
Tommy Dukes: What?
Ilya Fedorovich: “Champ”, hehehe, I’m ready for Subculture. You’ll tell him won’t you? Tell the Street Dog for me.
Trevor Mach: He’ll get the message. He watches the product.
Tommy Dukes: Wow. An eerie look in Ilya’s eyes.
Trevor Mach: Eerie and surreal, like when you’re on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 instead of 6:00.
Tommy Dukes: What is that?
Trevor Mach: What?
Tommy Dukes: Two really weird analogies in a row.
Trevor Mach: I’m uh…working on my analogies? My vocabulary is as bad as, like, whatever.
Tommy Dukes: …I see.
5. Tag: Zyro Kurogane/Seto Kaiba vs. Cade Yaggis/Picky Minch
-Main event time, saw tag team action on The Storm. On one side, the flashy and cocky Samurai Ifrit duo of Zyro Kurogane and Seto Kaiba. On the other, the cunning and unpredictable shooters from Blood 4 Blood, Picky Minch and "Trigger" Cade Yaggis. The match kicked off with Zyro Kurogane showcasing his lightning-fast strikes against the strategic Picky Minch. The contrasting styles of the two teams made for an engaging opening, with Zyro's acrobatics countered by Picky's technical prowess. Seto Kaiba and "Trigger" Cade Yaggis tagged in, the atmosphere becoming charged with their undeniable charisma. You can try to deny it, but you can't. Go ahead and try. It didn't work. You might think it did, but it didn't. Kaiba's smug demeanor clashed with Cade's explosive energy, creating sparks in the ring. As the match progressed, each team took turns gaining momentum. Zyro's agility and Kaiba's calculated offense put them ahead, but the resilience of Blood 4 Blood couldn't be underestimated. Picky and Cade utilized quick tags and double-team maneuvers to keep their opponents on their toes. The fans were treated to a back-and-forth display of athleticism and strategy, as both teams fought tooth and nail for supremacy in the squared circle. The exciting flow of the match was shattered when the ominous presence of Metal Rush infiltrated the arena. Hotlanta and Generator, flanked by the enigmatic Ness and Crono, stormed the ring. The new World Tag Team Champions attacked both Samurai Ifrit and Blood 4 Blood. Chaos erupted as the invading force unleashed a relentless assault on the bewildered competitors. The referee called for the bell, signaling the match's premature end.
Winners: No Contest
Tommy Dukes: Trevor Mach is rushing into the ring to help his boys! An unfamiliar sight here, as Blood 4 Blood AND Samurai Ifrit are fighting off Metal Rush! They’re making it clear all bets are off, and Metal Rush is definitely considering anyone who isn’t with them, an enemy. Folks, this episode feels like it took two weeks to write! We’ll see you next week on HAVOK!
Last edited by Machismo (11/21/2023 9:28 am)
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Limber Studio - Limber Mines
The Angel Express pulled into the quiet northwestern town, with the Sailor Sensations and Weekend Wrecking Crew ALL wanting to explore the new town that Xcite wished to add to its touring schedule. Tack Angel stretched as “his” cat Catzenmeow hopped out of the bus behind him. He turned to find it following him before feeling a harsh slap on his back.
*Slap!*
Tack Angel: Whoa!
Rick Shaw: Easy partner, it’s just your old pal Rick Shaw. This is quite the town huh? Surrounded by trees as far as the eye can see, with a giant lake too.
Tack Angel: Yeah…it’s something…beats Mid-South…but everything beats Mid-South.
Rick Shaw: Huh?
Tack Angel: Nothing. People can’t seem to understand my feelings…except Pat Mustard for some reason.
Rick Shaw: I think that little lady over there understands ya just fine.
Tack Angel: Catzenmeow? That’s a cat.
Rick Shaw: The leggy brunette behind the cat.
Tack Angel: Makoto? Yeah…she’s the best. She’s everything a guy like me could hope for.
Rick Shaw: You two were making progress. What happened?
Tack Angel: I’m just clamming up. I mean…you know what today is right? You know what we’re here for?
Suddenly, Geoff Garrett did the Jackie Fargo strut off the bus wearing a tux, followed by Point Man, Saxon, Novus, and Bone Soldier.
Geoff Garrett: Today is the day! Haha! I’m getting married fellas! Hey, how many suits you own there, Point Man?
Point Man: The Point Man got a rental.
Geoff Garrett: Right. Always reliable. Hey Slap Angel, my Best Man! You ready for tonight?
Tack Angel: I’llneverbereadyforthehorrorsthatawaitme.
Geoff Garrett: That’s the spirit buddy. I gotta say, you are incredible all things considered. You saw a broken guy like me, who unfortunately for you, fell in love with your ex-wife, and not only are we still good good friends, but you agreed to be my Best Man and support me through all of this. You’re a good man Tack Angel…the BEST Man. Hahaha.
Tack Angel: Ihatethat-what? Uh…thank you?
Rick Shaw: You better get your tux on buddy!
Tack Angel: Yeah. *sigh* I guess so. Wait…was that CP Munk? Did he just…I JUST SAW MUNK AND-
Magnum PT: Relax Chief, I’ve got this.
Tack Angel: Huh?
Magnum PT: Call it a wedding present for Double G, but I’m going to take on ol’ Munk tonight!
Tack Angel: But I’M the one that-
Magnum PT: The Angel Express has paid off Tack! I’m going to take care of the “rodent problem!” Yeah!
Tack Angel: ….FU-
"Yngwie Malmsteen - My Resurrection"
Larry Grim: Welcome to Limber Mines! What seems like a quiet, podunk town, is host to the best brand in wrestling! It’s time for Xcite!
Apple Kid: *looking at a brochure* Yes, Limber Mines was once going to be a logging town, until minerals were found that appeared to be native to the area, thought to have been placed here from a meteor crash long ago. Therefore, Limber Mines was founded, and this small town came into a lot of money….which EBW is hoping to get some of. Ya know…just a piece.
Larry Grim: Right you are, and that’s why Limber Mines is gonna be Xcite Territory, and more than that, it’s going to play host to a WEDDING! You are all cordially invited to celebrate the wedding of Geoff Garrett and Tracy!
Apple Kid: A big night for sure!
Makoto Kino: It really is, but not just for that. My Sailor Sisters Rei Hino and Ami Mizuno will be in action against two of the 3Queens tonight, and I’m going to be right here at ringside to make sure their “maid” Bellerophon stays out of it!
Apple Kid: AH! Hey! Makoto is here!
Larry Grim: You need to get your eyes checked Apple.
Apple Kid: Says a man who has painted ping pong balls in his eye sockets.
Larry Grim: That’s more for YOUR benefit!
Makoto Kino: We’re starting the night off with a non-title bout…actually a LOT of them are non-title bouts.
Larry Grim: Yes, the champs are on display, to showcase their talents as way of a wedding gift to the happy couple. Johnny Starbound, the champion AND villain of the CXJ Division after the claims he’s made about it, will be taking on Brother Tiburon. Then the Sensations take on 3Queens in non-title action like you said. The EBW Women’s Champion Erica will in action against Ice of the Eagleland Gladiators. Bashin Dan and Jaden Yuki of Dan Club will face off with Troy and Snakebite. Magnum PT will have a bout with CP Munk, and we’re all looking forward to seeing him take care of business for his friend Tack.
Makoto Kino: I think Tack really wanted to have a match with CP Munk though.
Larry Grim: The main event will see EBW Champion Rama Raju battle Razorblade of “The Rizz” ahead of his biggest challenge to date, when we leave for Dalaam…like RIGHT after this show in fact…so next week you’ll see us in Dalaam for Xcite, and then the big RRR event! Take THAT Havok! Also, it was quite the coup to get here before the other guys, and speaking of them, we know that a few of our boys will be sticking around in Eagleland a little bit longer, as the Weekend Wrecking Crew will battle Samurai Ifrit for the World Team Championship Rings. ONLY watch that match this week, and then turn it off. Right? That’s how we should do it. Ya know…support our team.
Apple Kid: They’ll get the Rings, AND the ability to appear on either show. On top of that, Xcite will get our hands on The Storm, which would make ENN VERY happy!
Larry Grim: Let’s get the show underway with-
Johnny Starbound: People of Limber Mines, I’m so sorry to break the news to you, but the CXJ Division is a joke, and your opening match is predetermined. I’m going to lose by DQ, and it won’t matter. None of this matters. I’m being paid to “entertain” you. You want competition, you’re not going to find it in “MY” division. This title is worthless.
Larry Grim: People, that is NOT true!
Apple Kid: He’s lying. He’s totally lying. This is really killing our credibility.
Makoto Kino: I wouldn’t lie to you guys! He’s making it up!
EBW: Xcite
Limber Studio, Limber Mines
ENN
1. Non-Title CXJ Division Singles: Johnny Starbound vs. Brother Tiburon
-In the CXJ Division match between Johnny Starbound and Brother Tiburon, Johnny decided to undermine the division's spirit. As the match kicked off, Johnny's lack of seriousness became evident. Instead of engaging in a competitive display of athleticism, he opted to treat the bout like a joke. During the match, Johnny took advantage of a momentary truce, offering Brother Tiburon a seemingly friendly handshake. However, it was a ruse. Concealed within Johnny's palm were brass knuckles, and he viciously struck Brother Tiburon when the luchador unsuspectingly accepted the handshake.
Winner: Brother Tiburon via DQ
Larry Grim: This crowd is booing, and I don’t blame them. Xciters, I’m starting to think that Mav has a serious agenda to undermine our CXJ rebirth. It’s despicable.
Makoto Kino: …How do…do you say words like despicable without a tongue?
Larry Grim: …I uh…I don’t know.
The Rizz Locker Room
Preacher Ra was trying to hype up his three monsters ahead of their matches later in the night.
Preacher Ra: Keep cool my babies, I want you save that energy for the ring. I want that malevolent vibe contained and ready to explode ya feel me? Can ya dig it? Alright alright. That’s what the Preacher loves to hear. Gotta show these people that “The Rizz Is” ya dig? Now head on out there. Your main man needs to knock on the sky and listen to the sound if ya catch my drift.
Troy: The *bleep* are you talking about?
Snakebite: …I’m with him.
Preacher Ra: …Meditate…I need to meditate.
Razorblade: I…I knew that. I knew what he meant.
Preacher Ra sat in silence in the room as the trio left. In the distance, he could hear Troy battering a jobber for looking at him, but he tried pushing it out of his mind. Instead he was distracted by something else. The old television behind him suddenly lit up in static. Ra looked over and saw something he wasn’t expecting. The static gave way to a shot of the room he was in, with himself looking through the monitor at him.
Preacher Ra: What is thi-
“Preacher Ra:” Epahs segnahc ti…raeppasid t’nseod ygrene.
Preacher Ra: What? What?!
2. Women’s Non-Title Tag: Rei Hino/Ami Mizuno vs. Gianna Rambaldi/Hilda Iceheart
-Next up, in a thrilling women's tag team match, Rei Hino and Ami Mizuno squared off against the formidable EBW Women's Tag Team Champions, Gianna Rambaldi and "Shiva Reincarnate" Hilda Iceheart. Although this was a non-title bout, the stakes were high as both teams aimed to prove their dominance in the ring. Rei Hino and Gianna Rambaldi showcased their technical prowess, countering each other's moves with precision. Ami Mizuno and Hilda Iceheart entered the ring, bringing a different dynamic to the match. Hilda, with her imposing presence and Shiva-inspired demeanor, displayed strength and agility that kept Ami on the defensive. Ami, in turn, used her intelligence and quick reflexes to evade Hilda's powerful strikes. Rei and Ami coordinated their attacks, attempting to wear down the champions. Gianna and Hilda, however, demonstrated why they were the reigning tag team champions, seamlessly working together to turn the tide in their favor. In a surprising turn of events, Hilda Iceheart managed to gain control over Ami Mizuno. With a display of strength, she hoisted Ami up for a Northern Lights Bomb, and the referee counted the pin.
Winners: Gianna Rambaldi/Hilda Iceheart[o] via Northern Lights Bomb on Ami Mizuno -> Pin
Makoto Kino: Oh no! They tried so hard! 3Queens are really good at this!
Larry Grim: The Sensations are going to have to work hard to take them on, and that includes you Makoto. That Bellerophon has it out for you.
Makoto Kino: I’ll do what I can, for my friends and all the Xciters.
Apple Kid: You probably want to go and console your frien-
Makoto Kino: No, I need to stick around. The EBW Women’s Champion is up next.
Backstage
One of EBW’s “top” referees was being looked over by Doctor Degrees.
Degrees: Your results just came back.
Harvey Refman: Can I see them?
Degrees: Probably not. You’re blind…you’re literally all blind. EBW has been employing blind referees. This is actually insane.
Harvey Refman: To be fair, the chick ref that likes to be in front of the camera at all times isn’t blind…but she is tone deaf.
Degrees: I can’t clear you to officiate the next match. She’ll have to do it…I guess. As for you, we need to get you some new eyeballs or something.
Harvey Refman: Can you do that?
Degrees: I haven’t tried, but I’m gonna wing it.
Harvey Refman: Great. Until then…we need some officials for the night. Huh?
As they spoke Jammer and Vape were seen walking around the arena.
Vape: Last night I had this dream where Shrek was turned into a lady orge and Fionna was asked if it was cool. Fionna said it was cause she’s “bishrekual” and I woke up crying.
Jammer: …I had the same dream.
Vape: Really?
Jammer: No. Are you out of your mind? That’s insane.
Vape: Right…like having my hand degloved right? Haha!
Jammer: You have got to stop mentioning that. I’m trying not to picture it. Now THAT has been haunting my dreams.
Vape: It still really hurts! I was told not to take too many pain pills, cause I’ll get hooked. I was thinking I might as well have a drink though. Thinking of buying some 12 year old whiskey. What do you think?
Jammer: Let her buy her own whiskey you creeper!
Vape: What?! No! I meant-
Degrees: Gentlemen! Are you in matches tonight?
Jammer: Huh? No, I’m actually not booked. I’m not MAD about it or anything.
Vape: Degloved.
Jammer: *gags*
Degrees: Right. I knew that. I “re-gloved” it.
Jammer: *gags again*
Degrees: Congratulations, you’re going to ref tonight!
Vape: Rad!
Jammer: Well I was going to shoot some hoops- oh forget it fine! A former World Champion will wear the ref stripes tonight.
Vape: That’s the spirit!
Jammer: Don’t touch me with that hand!
3. Non-Title Women’s Singles: Erica vs. Ice Special Referee: Jammer
-The third match was another women's bout as Erica, the EBW Women's Champion and leader of 3Queens, faced off against the formidable Ice from the Eagleland Gladiators. Jammer came out to call the match for two reasons. The ladies refused to let Vape call the match, and the dancing attention seeking lady referee is just awful. The match started with a tense lock-up, each woman vying for control. Erica, known for her technical prowess, executed a quick arm drag, taking Ice by surprise. However, Ice's raw strength quickly became evident as she powered out of a hold and retaliated with a powerful scoop slam. Siren, on the outside in support of Ice, remained vigilant. Little did she know that Bellerophon, lurking in the shadows, was preparing a sneak attack. The deaf gladiator was oblivious to the impending threat. Meanwhile, inside the ring, Erica and Ice engaged in a back-and-forth struggle. Ice utilized her height advantage with a thunderous spinebuster, attempting to wear down the champion. Erica, however, showcased her resilience, countering with a jaw-dropping tornado DDT. Bellerophon seized an opportunity and struck Siren from behind, leaving her incapacitated on the outside. Back in the ring, Erica seized control. Despite Ice's powerful offense, Erica displayed her agility with a lightning-quick enzuigiri. As the crowd roared, Erica ascended the turnbuckle and executed a breathtaking crossbody, but Ice powered out of the subsequent pin attempt. On the outside, Makoto left the announce table and tried to fight off Bellerophon, but she once again showed far more power than she had in her original run. Makoto and Siren together managed to make her back off. Back in the ring, with both competitors visibly fatigued, Erica was the first to her feet. As Ice attempted another power move, Erica countered with a well-timed reversal, transitioning seamlessly into an Air Raid Crash for the pin and the win.
Winner: Erica via Air Raid Crash -> Pin
Larry Grim: Erica with the win, but Makoto kept Bellerophon from getting her hands on Ice, and kept Siren out of harm’s way.
Apple Kid: That’s our Makoto. Here comes Usagi to help her! Is that toast in her mouth!
Larry Grim: The ring is no place for her cat!
Erica isn’t having any of it, as she just pushes Usagi away! We’re going to need Red Shirts on the job! I know they’re in tuxedos right now, but the Black Shirts will get decimated!
Backstage
Good News Gary: Good News Everyone! No, it’s Rains…he’s uh…not booked…until the RRR event at least! That’s where EBW Champion Rama Raju will defend against Colby Roads, Troy, and Mav Valentine! This is a big challenge for you. You don’t even have to be the one to be beaten to lose the title!
Rama Raju: I would find that cowardly. If you want what is mine, you should beat me for it. Even if that means all three of them fight against me solely, that is the challenge I agreed to. That is what I am prepared for. That is the fire I will step into in Dalaam. I am going home for this defense. The people of my village, those that remain following the destruction, will be there. My friend…Bheem…he will be there too.
Good News Gary: Bheem?
Rama Raju: The Water….my good friend. He is the protector of his own village. I once helped him retrieve a small child from the clutches of unseemly people. These people will inspire me to push through my limits, and I will walk away, still the EBW Champion.
Good News Gary: You sound pretty confident about it.
Rama Raju: I succeed, or I fall, but I will know that I fought with every trace of fire in my body. When we battle, near the banks of the Godavari River, I will show you what is truly inside of me.
Catering
A frustrated Makoto was looking for 3Queens, when she saw a sad Tack sitting alone at a table creating a strange concoction. It appeared to be a hot dog, but the dog was the bun, sliced in half, as he stuffed it with bread.
Makoto Kino: What is that Tack?
Tack Angel: The world is not yet ready for the Doghot.
Makoto Kino: What?
Tack Angel: Huh?
Makoto Kino: Tonight is the night huh?
Tack Angel: Yep. Bright lights…hype crowd.
Makoto Kino: I meant the wedding.
Tack Angel: Yeah…I know.
Makoto Kino: It’s bothering you, isn’t it?
Tack Angel: You know the funny thing? I’ll tell you this…because I trust you. It actually doesn’t.
Makoto Kino: Really?
Tack Angel: It’s weird, but I feel like this split with Tracy….was inevitable, and it feels like it has already happened, and it was some time ago. I just want her to be happy, no matter how she feels about me.
Makoto Kino: And you’re buddy Geoff too right?
Tack Angel: Idon’treallywannatalkabouthim. I just want it to be done and over with, so I can move on.
Makoto Kino: Move on…*blushing* to what?
Tack Angel: Um…I think you kn-
Point Man: Tack! The Point Man thinks we have a problem!
Tack Angel: Keeping the tactical mask on with the suit Pointer? What’s up?
Point Man: The Point Man was looking for Geoff’s guests, and one of them is a man named Matchwell Enron.
Tack Angel: …Of course it is. Wait, that’s the guy whose father was-
Point Man: Yes, he did THAT whole thing.
Tack Angel: Oh. Uh…go on?
Point Man: He went to the restroom and locked the door. I can’t get him to come out.
Tack Angel: Well…I guess I could TRY to help? I’ll see you later Makoto.
Makoto Kino: Yeah…see you later…Tacky Star Bo- what am I saying?
Restroom
Point Man lead Tack to the restroom where the son of a business magnate, Matchwell Enron had locked himself in.
Tack Angel: The names of these people. If it’s not Pat Mustand it’s Clem Fandango and- *knock knock* Hello? Matchwell? It’s Tack Angel. Listen buddy, we need you to come out. It’s almost time for the wedding, *sigh* Double G would hate if you missed it. Hello? Matchwell? We’re worried about you so…I’m gonna have to…kick open the door?
Point Man: The Point Man believes so!
Tack Angel: *sigh* Alright. Stand back Point Man.
Tack kicked open the door, as he and Point Man looked inside to see a horrible sight.
Tack Angel: Alright Matchwell, we need to-WHAT THE HECK AND A HALF?!
Matchwell Enron had his head in the toilet, and he was slowly being pulled down into it by an unknown force before disappearing completely. Tack and Point Man stood in silence, but Tack turned to Point Man.
Tack Angel: We did NOT just see that. Do you understand?
Point Man: The Point Man understands.
Tack Angel: Do NOT tell Geoff about this, because I don’t even know what THIS…is!
Point Man: Don’t know what WHAT is?
Tack Angel: EXACTLY!
4. Tag: Bashin Dan/Jaden Yuki vs. Troy/Snakebite
-In a clash of rivalries and contrasting dynamics, the tag team match unfolded as Bashin Dan and Jaden Yuki of Dan Club squared off against the disorganized duo of Troy and Snakebite from The Rizz. With the bewildered Preacher Ra on the outside, The Rizz struggled to maintain cohesion, while Dan Club aimed to exploit their opponents' discord. Bashin Dan and Jaden Yuki immediately took control with a series of quick tags and double-team maneuvers. Their chemistry was evident as they executed a tandem suplex on Snakebite, showcasing the seamless synergy of Dan Club. On the outside, a distracted Preacher Ra desperately tried to rally his team, but the anger-fueled Troy seemed more interested in venting his frustration against Dan than strategizing. The disorganization within The Rizz allowed Dan Club to maintain their dominance. Troy, a fount of rage, entered the ring with a wild flurry of strikes, targeting both Bashin Dan and Jaden Yuki. However, this aggression played into the hands of Dan Club, who capitalized on Troy's erratic movements with precise counters. Snakebite, recognizing the need to bring stability to the team, entered the fray. He displayed technical prowess, countering Jaden Yuki's high-flying offense with a well-timed spinebuster. Despite Snakebite's efforts to restore order, the disarray within The Rizz proved challenging to overcome. As the match reached its climax, Jaden Yuki seized an opportunity to showcase the GX Factor for the pin and the win on the Mid-South roughneck.
Winners: Bashin Dan/Jaden Yuki[o] via GX Factor on Snakebite -> Pin
Larry Grim: Dan and Jaden with the win! Jaden’s about to rap, but Troy is hitting him with the big boot! Dan is getting in his way, and a fight is breaking out!
Apple Kid: Preacher Ra looked so out of it for the whole match. I wonder what was up with that? It seems to have had an effect on the team though. Troy was an unchecked rage monster. Um….onto the next match?
Larry Grim: Why are you saying it like that?
Apple Kid: Cause it’s Munk vs. PT.
Larry Grim: Oh right…the match we uh…have been waiting for?
5. Singles: Magnum PT vs. CP Munk Special Referee: Vape
-Next up, Magnum PT and CP Munk prepared to face off in a high-stakes match. Magnum PT, known for his power, mullet, and power-mullet, locked up with CP Munk, a crafty and unpredictable wrestler..chipmunk..man...and former EBW Champion. The early moments of the match saw a back-and-forth exchange of holds and strikes as both competitors jockeyed for control. Magnum PT showcased his strength with a series of impactful slams, while CP Munk relied on his agility to evade and counter. Outside the ring, a livid Tack Angel, dressed in a tuxedo, couldn't contain his anger over Munk's recent actions involving Tracy. Desperate to get his hands on CP Munk, Tack Angel attempted to breach the barricade, but the vigilant LG Rod and Randy no Kachi intervened, preventing him from reaching his target. Back inside the ring, CP Munk capitalized on the distraction, delivering a low blow to Magnum PT behind the Vape's back. The crowd jeered at Munk's underhanded tactics, but it fueled his determination to secure the win. With Magnum PT momentarily stunned, CP Munk seized the opportunity and executed his signature move, the Go 2 Munk. The devastating maneuver left Magnum PT sprawled on the canvas, and Munk quickly went for the cover. Even with Vape using the wrong hand and hurting it again, he still counted the 1-2-3!
Winner: CP Munk via Go 2 Munk -> Pin
Larry Grim: Tack in a tux is demanding a match with CP Munk, but Colby Roads, RnK, and LG Rod are helping him get away. Tack, like Colby, just wants to FINISH! THE! STORY!
Apple Kid: CP Munk seems to get in the way of that on both occasions if you think about it. Well folks, strap in, because the EBW Champion is in action in the main event. He’ll be taking on Razorblade in Non-Title action.
Larry Grim: Then after that, the wedding event of the year, as Geoff Garrett and Tracy tie the knot!
Backstage
Tracy was being a bridezilla, yelling at her hair dresser as she put the finishing touches on her look.
Tracy: You’re a disgrace! I’d fire you if I was the one paying you! Take a hike! I can do this better myself! *sigh* This has to be PERFECT OR I’LL-
Christina Angel: Mom….we need to talk.
Tracy: *sigh* I’d rather you stop calling me that. It’s tiresome.
Christina Angel: What?
Tracy: I don’t want to be your mother Christina. Christy I have to accept on some level. You? You came out of nowhere…and I never felt that “motherly bond” with you.
Christina Angel: …To be honest…I feel like you’re an imposter that was posing as my Mom, but with Dad taking part in this, I want to be out there to….to support him. You’re torturing him you know?
Tracy: I didn’t ask Geoff to make him Best Man! Those two are bonded. Nothing I can do about it, even though I HATE IT. Don’t you have better things to do? Go lose to 3Queens or something. You’re good at that. You’re wasting your prime and potential. You could have been making bank kiddo. You’re a disappointment.
Christina Angel: Not to who really matters. You don’t matter to me…not anymore.
Tracy: Oh I’ll matter. I’ll matter to all of you…when I’m finished.
Fed up, Christina stormed off. Tracy smirked and returned to primping her hair.
Tracy: Ask Tali Mach if I matter. If you’re not careful Christina…you’ll share her fate.
6. Non-Title Singles: Rama Raju vs. Razorblade
-Main event time as EBW Champion, Rama Raju, known as "The Fire," faced off against the hardcore brawler from VBW, Razorblade. The anticipation in the arena was palpable as both competitors eyed each other, ready to engage in a fierce battle. So much palp. Almost TOO MUCH palp. The bell rang, and the match kicked off with a flurry of strikes and grapples. Razorblade, living up to his hardcore reputation, wasted no time trying to introduce weapons into the mix. It was obvious victory wasn't the goal but destruction of the EBW Champion. Rama Raju, however, demonstrated his resilience and technical prowess. Despite the onslaught of hardcore tactics, "The Fire" showcased his agility, countering Razorblade's weapon-based offense with precise kicks and quick dodges to keep the match from going to a DQ. As the match progressed, the chaos escalated. Troy and Snakebite, sensing an opportunity to interfere and weaken Raju ahead of his title defense in Dalaam, stormed the ring. Their interference threatened to tip the scales in Razorblade's favor. Mav Valentine, a formidable force in his own right, rushed to the ring, evening the odds. The audience erupted in cheers as Mav Valentine unleashed a series of powerful strikes on Troy and Snakebite, thwarting their interference. Not to be outdone, Jackson Kain, the friendly rival of Mav Valentine, joined the fray. The ring became a battleground as chaos reigned, with Mav Valentine and Jackson Kain fending off Troy and Snakebite on the outside. Back inside the ring, Razorblade, momentarily distracted by the chaos around him, fell victim to Rama Raju's Burning Arrow. "The Fire" executed the move flawlessly, driving Razorblade into the canvas for the pin.
Winner: Rama Raju via Burning Arrow -> Pin
Larry Grim: Mav and Jackson are both helping Rama Raju! Here comes Dan Club too! They are backing up the EBW Champion as The Rizz backs off. Colby and his group were also lurking, ready to strike, but the Eagleland Cheese will have to smolder for a little bit longer, before the big day. In Dalaam at RRR, we’re gonna see the biggest challenge for Rama Raju yet!
Backstage
Tack was prepping to go out and join the wedding party that was setting up in the stage, as he hesitated and grabbed a top hat.
Tack Angel: What can I do to hide myself in plain sight? Wear this hat? Wait…
Tack found a white eye mask and put it on with the top hat.
Tack Angel: Yeah…that oughta do i- ah who am I kidding?
Makoto Kino: Tack?
Tack Angel: Makoto!
Makoto Kino: What you’re wearing looks….very familiar. *blush*
Tack Angel: Yeah? I can’t wear it out there though. Forget it. The best I can do is just put on a grin and bear it. Here we go.
Makoto Kino: Tack. No matter what you think or how you feel, just know that I’m proud of you. I see you. I know what you go through. I’m here for you…if…if uh…you need someone to talk to.
Tack Angel: Thank you.
Makoto Angel: Also…I’m gonna try this Doghot that I made.
Tack Angel: *gasp*
And thus, it came to pass, that the time of the sacred union betwixt man and woman was nigh, and furthermore- Sorry, I don’t know what that was. Moving on, it was time for the REAL main event pitting Geoff Garrett against Tracy, in the vows of Holy Matrimony. No Holds Barred! Anything goes! Prenuptials? Possibly. Geoff Garrett and the Weekend Wrecking Crew were all out in matching tuxedos, with Tack Angel standing next to Geoff Garrett, red in the face with a plastered smile, probably to hide his immense joy. Brother Tiburon was set to officiate, complete with the black eye he’d been given earlier by Johnny Starbound. Tracy came out alone, as anyone that tried to hold up her dress was shooed away. Geoff was beaming as Tack’s grin widened along with his eyes. She entered the ring and stop with Geoff at the altar, trying to position Double G so she didn’t have to see Tack.
Brother Tiburon: Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to celebrate the union between Geoff Garrett and Tracy. Geoff lost his beloved wife not too long ago, and Tracy…well she found her way into his arms. Tonight, they will be paired together forever as husband and wife. I understand you have some vows you’ve prepared?
Geoff Garrett: Tracy, you are my sun, my moon, my starry sky. Baby, you make everything better, like a guitar shot to my heart. You reminded me of what love is, and I can’t thank you enough for letting me Jackie Fargo strut down the aisle once more with the love of my life. God is good, and he has healed my broken heart.
Tack Angel: Awthat’sactuallynice.
Tracy: Geoff, I was looking in all the wrong places for love before I met you. I found myself in the arms of those who promised to free me from the dark, depraved, and abusive clutches of Tack Angel.
Tack Angel: Ohnoherewego.
Tracy: I know it’s a little inappropriate to mention in the middle of our vows, but this marriage must be built on complete and utter honesty. Yes, I rant to CP Munk after feeling the cold scorn of Tack for so long.
Tack Angel: StupidCPMunk.
Tracy: And before that was w00t.
Tack Angel: Waitwhat?!
Tracy: And before that was Cadmus.
Tack Angel: Excuseme?!
Tracy: And before that was Tali.
Tack Angel: Iknewaboutthatonebutitstillsucks.
Tracy: And before that was w00t the first time.
Tack Angel: WHAT?!
Tracy: Yes, I’ve made my mistakes, and I’ve lived a lie, but thanks to you Geoff, I can be myself. I can be who I was truly meant to be, and I can feel real love again, not the kind of fake love that Tack Angel promises, which only feels good until he finds another “set” to look at, and then tosses you to the side while promising he can multitask.
Tack Angel: You know, this is a really horrible thing to say during your vows!
Tracy: It sure is, but you’re the only one hearing them. Psychic remember? Just like my brother. I was a late bloomer, but Paula showed me a few tricks. Everyone else is hearing oh wonderful you are, handing me off to Geoff and all, but I needed you to know just what I think about all of this, and just how out of touch and naive you were. I haven’t been yours in over a decade, and you only have yourself to blame.
Tack Angel: I DIDN’T DO ANYTHING WROOOONG!
Brother Tiburon: Tack? Are you alright?
Tack Angel: Huh?
Geoff Garrett: Slap Angel, take a deep breath. You don’t mean it do ya?
Tack Angel: What are you talking about?
Brother Tiburon: I was asking if anyone objected to the marriage, speak now or forever hold your peace.
Tack Angel: You were? You were! Right! I uh…I-
Tack looked to speak up against Tracy, but then saw Double G’s sad face, the shocked looks of the Weekend Wrecking Crew, and the sadness in the crowd.
Tack Angel: I uh…meant that I didn’t do anything wrong….when I gave these two my blessing. I fully approve….of this marriage. Geoff? *looks to Tracy* She’s all yours.
Brother Tiburon: Well said Tack. Geoff and Tracy, it is within my power by God almighty and the country of Eagleland to proclaim the two of you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.
The crowd erupted into cheers as Geoff and Tracy kissed. Tack smiled a little, relieved that it was finally over. He turned to look at Makoto, who was already looking at him. They shared a long gaze into each other’s eyes and Tack felt a moment of peace and happiness, until-
Larry Grim: HOLY SMOKES! THAT’S SAMURAI IFRIT!
Tack Angel: Huh?!
Zyro Kurogane, Seto Kaiba, Kinniku Mike, and Isiah Muscle ran down from the crowd and jumped into the ring, attacking the contenders for their World Team Championship Rings. Mike surprised Tack, and hit him with a belly to belly right into the wedding cake. Zyro hit the Straight Jacket Hagen on Geoff as Tracy rolled out of the ring. Isiah took Saxon and Novus out of the ring to brawl, as Point Man, Dungaree Danson, and Brunson Burner tried to get Geoff out of the ring. Mike picked up Bone Soldier and spiked him with a Piledriver. The scene was a complete mess, as Samurai Ifrit stood atop the pile to end the show.
Offline
Outside of the Mid-South Sportasseum stood Samurai Ifrit, weapons in hand, as they were being rounded up by Renegade Security and Darius Grouch.
Darius Grouch: I appreciate the intent here gentlemen, but I want this match in the ring ON THE SHOW! This is a ratings war after all.
Seto Kaiba: Which is exactly why we waited until the very last second to strike those clowns, so it did absolutely nothing to said ratings. The favor could be returned by looking the other way.
Darius Grouch: Shrewd…but I don’t think so. I want this match. It’s signed, sealed, and it will be delivered. That being said, the four of you better understand that victory is your only option here. The penalty for defeat will be….severe.
Zyro Kurogane: Who do you think you’re talking to “Rumble”. I’m the Zyro-K BEY-BEY! I’m the best guy you’ve got on this whole brand! I let it rip like no one else, and not ONLY am I going to hang onto this ring for as long as I want it, but I’m going to show up that mute moron Ness this weekend! So sure, we’ll back off right now, but come main event time, you’re going to see the show you’re looking for. You’re gonna GET the results you’re looking for. We’re going to entertain while maim, like only WE can. BEY……BEY.
As they walked away, The Angel Express pulled up, with Tack, Geoff, Saxon, and Novus coming out. Tack was expecting boos, but was instead met with cheers.
Tack Angel: Huh? What? They’re cheering? The people of Mid-South are cheering US? Why? Are their minds dulled from the booze? Spousal abuse? More booze? Country music? What IS with country music? Male country music talks about hot chicks in tiny shorts that you make your wife, bear the kids, front porch family values, and casseroles….above all casseroles. Female country music is like “oops I killed my husband!” So stupid.
Geoff Garrett: They’re cheering cause we’re from here Slap Angel!
Tack Angel: I’m TACK Angel, and I’m NOT from here!
Saxon: You live here.
Tack Angel: NOOOT by choice!
Novus: You ready Double G? Your security is right here with ya to strut on in. By the way, how did the honeymoon go with the new missus Geoff?
Tack Angel: Nobody wants to hear about that Novus! Listen Geoff, I’m really confused here. You speak hic- Mid-Southerner…why would they cheer even though we’re on the “other team?” Sports team mentality is the all consuming monster for mar- wrestling fans.
Geoff Garrett: People do love the brand, that’s true, but Slap Angel, you’re forgetting about those P-O-Double P-E-R-S!
Tack Angel: Place poppers? They’re popping cause we’re- you’re from this place?! So that means they will cheer for us over their own brand that they love…because of geographical proximity?
Geoff Garrett: Uh-huh!
Tack Angel: Because I might live in the same city limits?
Geoff Garrett: Yep!
Tack Angel: Loyalty is defined by an arbitrary line that doesn’t even really exist?
Geoff Garrett: You got it!
Novus: Plus, because of the home field advantage, we have place popper powers! We’re totally going to win tonight!
Tack Angel: What?! I mean I like the confidence, but it sounds like you have no doubt in your mind!
Novus: We’re from here!
Tack Angel: SO YOU ARE NOVUS! That can’t be real though right? It’s the same ring, albeit 8-sided in Havok. You mean to tell me just because we’re from here….we’re somehow stronger?
Novus: Yeah!
Tack Angel: You’re making that up. I-
Trevor Mach: Tackleton! Long time no see buddy!
Tack Angel: Oh thank God! Trevor! My only friend who makes sense!
Trevor Mach: I make sense to you?! Things must be DIRE!
Tack Angel: Tell them it’s ridiculous to think we’re going to win tonight just because of the location of the match.
Trevor Mach: Oh yeah, I’ve been frazzled by it to be honest.
Tack Angel: Huh?
Trevor Mach: Dumb place popping physics and what not. When you get those Rings, just know a Havok team is going to have to hunt ya down. Later buddy!
Tack Angel: *sigh* The world is stupid.
“Skillet - Feel Invincible”
Tommy Dukes: Tommy Dukes here and we’re in the Mid-South Sportasseum Renegades, for another exciting and can’t miss episode of Havok! The BEST brand in wrestling!
Nerma: We’re just days away from “Feel the Rush!” a Havok only special event that is NOT gonna be on the other channel! It’s an ENT+ only spectacular, and you’re not going to want to miss it, but tonight isn’t just a go home show. We’re not even going home after the show. We’re going to Onett, the homebase as it were for Metal Rush. No, tonight you’re going to see Samurai Ifrit attempt to defend from an Xcite incursion. The Weekend Wrecking are back for another attempt at the Team Rings and The Storm. They want ‘em, and we’ve got ‘em. This time however, Tack Angel and Geoff Garrett are leading the Red Shirts into battle. Tack and Geoff are already loaded with gold, so they have what it takes, but so do our World Team Champions! Samurai Ifrit are not always the most likable guys, but they have been stalwarts for the brand so far, and we’re backing them 100%!
Tommy Dukes: Such a big show from top to bottom. We have Subculture in action. We have Hope Mach taking on Mitra Lennox in a Bushido Rules bout. We have “Dynamic” Dougie Mach taking on Metal Rush’s w00t. We have the big grudge match being fought over “Doug Doug” with Rhea Rampage taking on Heather Mach. We have Grind taking on Blood 4 Blood’s Cade Yaggis, the Triggerman himself, who was narrowly beaten last week by Ness. Finally, we have that stellar main event. It’s going to be something special so-
WE ARE METAL RUSH!
In a dark room, Grind skated around a dim light hanging from the ceiling. Out of the darkness stepped a heavily bandaged Poo, who did not look very happy at all.
Poo: Surprised to see me? One trip to the Grindhouse isn’t enough to stop me. Our cause means too much to us Trevor. The World Championship means too much to us, and we will have it. If not around my waist, then why not the waist of your old pal Grind. You took so much from him in the past, it’s time he takes something from you.
Another figure stepped out of the darkness. She stopped Grind in his tracks and rubbed Grind’s chest with her scarred hand.
Ripper Jane: Seems to be a pattern of thinking one loss is enough to keep us down forever. The fun is just beginning. This guy here was the right choice all along. Not that loser in the Tanooki Suit, and not the loser with a crippled wife. HAHAHA! Let’s get straight to the point. Grind wants a title shot. Metal Rush wants to see that he gets it. I want to see that he gets it. We will carve you all up to get it. Don’t make us do it. That’s why they brought us on. Guys like Ness, they want to keep their hands as clean as possible. That’s not saying he’s weak. No no no…Ness is shrewd. Ness knows what to do. That’s why he and Paula decided that I was perfect for this team. HAHAHA! I’ll do the things they wouldn’t dream of. Very soon Blood 4 Blood….you’re gonna FEEL…..THE RUSH! HAHAHA!
-
Tommy Dukes: Well…isn’t it great that Ripper Jane is back? Just love that….psychopath.
Nerma: Uh-huh. Well before we get to the action, I’d just like to say that Havok has two sponsors tonight. First off, we have John Hamm’s John Ham. The Ham you eat on the….John? Seriously?
Tommy Dukes: Aaaand the wonderful Mid-South 2-Star Hotel and Suites and Inn and Hotel! Amenities, elevator, curtains with sticks. You’ll find all of these at the luxurious Mid-South 2-Star Hotel and Suites and Inn and Hotel! The rooms are just STOCKED with everything required by law. Tiny soap in plastic, phone that blinks, band-aid colored blankets, chair for suitcase, blow dryer that sometimes works, short glass, and stain in a place you have to touch. You can’t beat Mid-South 2-Star Hotel and Suites and Inn and Hotel! Be sure to enjoy the hot tub. It is perpetually occupied by an eight year old in googles who will stare at your breasts. He’s been in there for hours, and he’s not getting out until you do.
Nerma: Want to see the sights? Make sure to ask the concierge Jeff.
Tommy Dukes: But be warned. He’s having a rough month….every month.
Nerma: Tripadviser had this to say about Mid-South 2-Star Hotel and Suites and Inn and Hotel. It is “a stock photo you can sleep in I guess”. It’s also the place where that guy did that thing. You know, the thing on the news? He did that here.
Tommy Dukes: Situated between the DMV and an abandoned fast food joint, it’s the place that will make your uber driver say “Are you sure?”
Nerma: Hungry? Make sure you check out the breakfast, where they will supply you with your favorites like wet egg, cereal in gumball machine, DIY waffle, sausage of unknown origin, and of course our yogurt case that gets padlocked the second breakfast ends, which is five minutes before you wake up. You wanted yogurt? Wake up at 4am *bleep*.
Tommy Dukes: If you need anything, just remember to ask Jeff. He will drop your bags. He will scratch your car. He will watch political videos on his phone, with no headphones. He will also offer to get you cocaine and then flake. He is in fact chaos incarnate, and you can find him and the helpful staff at the Mid-South 2-Star Hotel and Suites and Inn and Hotel!
Nerma: Please use the hotel for all of life’s events like conferences, interventions, Magic the Gathering tournaments, affair with old man, meeting stranger that claims to have “information”, Blue Blue cult deprogramming, after prom “hand stuff”, but mostly hiding from the police.
Tommy Dukes: Remember, it’s the Mid-South 2-Star Hotel and Suites and Inn and Hotel otherwise known as “Let’s not go to that one, let’s go to the good one on the other side of town”.
Nerma: Welp, that paid the bills, let’s get to the action with Subculture…he’s in action first.
Tommy Dukes: Who is his opponent?
Nerma: …He’s in action first!
Tommy Dukes: Let’s…uh…take it to the ring!
EBW: Havok
Mid-South Sportasseum, Mid-South
ENT
1. Singles: Subculture vs. Fighter Daron
-In the opening match, Subculture of Blood 4 Blood stepped into the ring against Fighter Daron. Subculture wasted no time in bringing the fight to Fighter Daron. The Renegades erupted in cheers as Subculture unleashed a flurry of acrobatic maneuvers and striking combinations. Fighter Daron, still confused by the audience's indifference, adopted a more methodical approach. The crowd, however, remained indifferent, offering neither cheers nor boos for Fighter Daron's calculated style. As the match progressed, Subculture's agility and teamwork proved to be too much for Fighter Daron. Subculture delivered a devastating KO Punch that echoed through the arena. The impact left Fighter Daron sprawled on the canvas, unconscious. 1-2-3! Subculture with the win!
Winner: Subculture via KO Punch -> Pin
Subculture: You see that Ilya? THAT is how to knock someone out. I’ve seen you punching walls lately, but walls don’t punch back. Plus, the fact that your hands aren't horribly mangled tells me you’re holding back. When I swing, I punch with everything that I’ve got. That’s why I wear these gloves if I’m being honest. I can’t hold back, so something has to hold back for me. I don’t want to concuss um…this guy…whoever he is…Fighter something, but I don’t hold back, and you’re going to find that out when I beat you AGAIN and retain the Television Championship!
Backstage
Mrs. Havok: YEAH! A win for my husband’s friend! That was quite decisive too. Someone else who wants a decisive victory is World Champion Trevor Mach. Trevor, you want your team to come out dominant at Feel the Rush am I right?
Trevor Mach: If you were wrong and I wanted to lose badly or just do OK, we’d BOTH need to be committed! Probably already do. Nah, it’s going to be a war, and we’re going to show Metal Rush that we mean business. We always mean business, even when I have the clown nose o- ESPECIALLY when I have the clown nose on. I’ve extended an olive branch to Grind. I said as much on The Storm. I was hoping he was going to take it. Obviously this is the response. Alright bud, we’ll do it your way, but it’s going to hurt. If you have the guts to take off the skates and do it RIGHT…you might impress me. As of now, you’re using Tack’s “Air Bud” rule where it doesn’t say in the rulebook that you CAN’T use skates…but let’s be real, that dog should not have been playing basketball in a legitimate competition! You going to guard against a golden retriever?! I’m NOT! I LOVE dogs! That doggo gets to score the points EVERY TIME! I’d block my own team for HIM! I’M GETTING OFF TRACK! I-
Ripper Jane: You’re not taking this very seriously holy boy.
Trevor Mach: Oh boy. Here we go.
Ripper Jane: Yeah, here we go. You were interesting before ya know, I liked the monster inside of you.
Jane suddenly grabbed Trevor by the crotch.
Ripper Jane: I liked this monster inside of-
Trevor Mach: *high pitched* Hey! Let go! *clears throat* Sorry to disappoint, but I was on the road to a burn out, and now I’m just fine. You really need to let go. That’s not FOR you.
Ripper Jane: Oh of course, it’s for the cripple right? She’s at the right height in that chair. She must have an impressive mouth game to keep you around, considering your voracious appetite and-
Trevor Mach: Stop! You’re going too far.
Ripper Jane: What are you going to do about it?
Trevor Mach: I don’t have to listen to it. I don’t owe you my time or attention. Gring’s biggest mistake wasn’t picking a fight with me, I’m just going to beat him in the ring. You? You’re going to eat him alive. Heh…good luck to him.
Ripper Jane: …Mrs. Havok eh? You think you can be me huh?
Mrs. Havok: …Oh no.
-
Moira Lees: Aye, lads and lasses! Would ya look at this grand crowd gatherin' to hear what ol' Moira Lees has got to say. Now, I've been a-wrestlin' across the Highlands to the Lowlands, and I've been slingin' some proper shenanigans in the ring, and I ain't got no time for da wee posh *bleep*s givin' me ta runaround. Och aye, it's a fierce battle we're lookin' fer, iddn't it? I'm lookin' ta throw doon wit da best of 'em! Moira Lees is here to gie it laldy, and I'll be sendin' any ne'er-do-well who crosses me to the heilan' coos. Ye can tak' that tae the ceilidh!
Christy Angel: Chick, what the hell are you talking about?
Moira Lees: Eh?
Moira looked around and realized she was in the Gamer Girls room.
Christy Angel: You’re in the way of the screen.
Alison Chains: I thought she WAS the screen! I’m not controlling her with my controller? How is she moving on her own? I think I took too much LCD.
Christy Angel: You mean LSD?
Alison Chains: Is that what the screen is called?
Christy Angel: Hey, weren’t we going to go out there with Hope tonight?
Alison Chains: Yeah, but I don’t wanna.
Christy Angel: Oh…alright.
Kid Havok: Hey girls? Where are the bagpipes coming from?
Alison Chains: You hear those too? Oh good.
Moira Lees: …..
2. Lady Renegades Bushido Rules Singles: Hope Mach vs. Mitra Lennox
-In a highly anticipated clash under the Bushido Rules, Hope Mach and Mitra Lennox prepared to engage in a technical masterpiece. The squared circle was set for a contest where skill and strategy would be the key to victory. The opening moments of the match saw a display of technical prowess as Hope and Mitra engaged in a series of grapples, reversals, and submission attempts. Each competitor showcased their mastery of the Bushido Rules, emphasizing precision and calculated movements. Hope Mach, with her fluid transitions between holds, aimed to wear down Mitra Lennox. Mitra, known for her resilience and technical acumen, countered with a variety of escapes and reversals, keeping the audience on the edge of their seats. The ebb and flow of the match continued, with both wrestlers demonstrating a deep understanding of the Bushido Rules. No leaving the ring. No rope breaks. As the intensity of the match reached its peak, a sudden interruption occurred. Paula made her way to the ring, creating a moment of distraction. Seizing the opportunity, Hope feigned a Hagen and instead chucked Mitra straight out of the ring and onto the Women's World Champion. Hope Mach won by Ring Out!
Winner: Hope Mach via Ring Out
Tommy Dukes: And there goes Paula! She’s getting in the ring with Hope! Here comes Dem Girlz to hold Hope back! Darkness Aoi has joined Paula in the ring, but she’s not holding her back. They want a fight!
Nerma: Hope and Paula are going to clash in a generational battle for the ages when Havok goes to Onett to FEEL THE RUSH!
Backstage
Hope was helped to the back as Trevor rushed up to her.
Trevor Mach: Daughter! *signing and talking* Paula got into your head didn’t she?
Hope Mach: *signing and talking* I’m totally ready to fight her. I’m not afraid.
Trevor Mach: *signing and talking* No, I mean literally.
Hope Mach: *signing and talking* Oh right. Absolutely. I’m fine though.
Trevor Mach: *signing and talking* I’m glad to hear that. Family is very very important and I have to do my best to love and care for each and every-
Dougie Mach: Hey Trevor!
Trevor Mach: Huh? Oh hey. Am I in your way? There ya go.
Dougie Mach: Uh…thanks?
Trevor Mach: *signing and talking* As I was saying, it’s very important to love and care for each and every-
Heather Mach: Trevor! How can you stomach Dougie being with Rhea?!
Trevor Mach: Huh? I vomit blood thinking about it.
Heather Mach: Then why don’t you help me put a stop to it?
Trevor Mach: Because she used to have a voyeurism fetish, and she thought I didn’t notice. This got her off my back, so I don’t care what he does with his Dommy Mommy.
Heather Mach: UNBELIEVABLE!
Trevor Mach: As I was saying…*signing and talking* I love you Hope.
Hope Mach: Heh. *signing and talking* I love you too Dad.
Darius Grouch’s Office
“The Rumble” sat at his desk, fixing his tie before looking into the camera.
Darius Grouch: You don’t know me very well, and that’s by design, but you know my reputation, and you know enough about me to know that I don’t like to lose, and I’m willing to place big bets for what I want. I’m willing to risk it all. That’s why I have a few announcements to make in this war for brand supremacy. Swift believes he acquired a major coup by looking down the entire country of Dalaam? That’s cute Swift…really cute. However, I too have made an acquisition, and we’ll be heading there after the Feel the Rush event ONLY on ENT+. The people of Edo clamor for that Sengoku style action we’ve brought back to Eagleland with our little dispute. They want Havok, and they want it bad, and we’ve got a huge deal in place. Edo is exclusively Havok country, Xcite need not apply. As for here in the states? I saw that little show you put on in Limber Mines. I think the people deserve better. We’re coming for it, and I’m willing to wager a city myself to get it. Town for town as it were. Stay tuned. *lights cigar*
3. Singles: Dougie Mach vs. w00t
-"Dynamic" Dougie Mach and w00t of Metal Rush were up next for a one-on-one showdown. The atmosphere was charged with anticipation as the two competitors prepared to lock horns. As the bell rang, "Doug Doug" wasted no time in showcasing the skills that once earned him the moniker "Dynamic." The ring was alive with a flurry of athletic maneuvers, crisp strikes, and well-executed grapples. On the outside, Hotlanta and Generator, the vigilant members of Metal Rush, played a crucial role in keeping w00t focused. The Tanooki Suit that w00t wore filled him with an infectious happiness that he had to fight against to maintain focus on the match. Despite the joyous distraction, w00t brought the fight to Dougie, utilizing his unique blend of agility and technical prowess. Dougie, in turn, displayed resilience and adaptability, countering w00t's offense with the precision that made him a force to be reckoned with. Dougie, fueled by the energy of the crowd and his own determination, nearly secured victory with the Dynamic DDT. The audience erupted, thinking the match was over, but to their surprise, Hotlanta strategically intervened, placing w00t's foot on the ropes. As Dougie jaw-jacked with Hotlanta over the close call, w00t seized the opportunity. With a swift spin, he caught Dougie off guard and executed the wKo. Dougie Mach was spun around and driven into the canvas. w00t wasted no time and went for the pin.
Winner: w00t via wko -> Pin
Tommy Dukes: w00t with the win, but only because of Metal Rush backup. The World Tag Team Champions are legit laughing, while w00t is forcibly laughing. Dougie was close on that one. We can see the fire coming back in the Dynamic one! However, he saw Rhea and is now crying and she coddles him. Please tell me they don’t take the Dommy Mommy thing too literally.
Nerma: We don’t have to find out because here comes Heather to start this match!
4. Lady Renegades Singles: Rhea Rampage vs. Heather Mach
-In a heated grudge match, Rhea Rampage and Heather Mach stepped into the ring, emotions running high as their conflict centered around Heather's concerns for her cousin, Dougie Mach. The match kicked off with an intensity that reflected the deep-rooted issues between Rhea and Heather. The two competitors exchanged hard-hitting strikes and grappling maneuvers, each trying to assert dominance and prove a point. The animosity spilled outside the ring, where Heather's cousin, Dougie Mach, had been a point of contention. Heather, driven by a desire to protect Dougie from what she perceived as a bad influence, fought with a determination bordering on ferocity. Rhea, on the other hand, reveled in the chaos, taunting and provoking her opponent. Amidst the turmoil, Valarie Dorado made her way to ringside, seemingly looking to aid Heather in the confrontation. Valarie, counting her cash, appeared ready to make a decisive move. However, Rhea, undeterred, countered by tossing even more cash Valarie's way, convincing her to stay out of the fray. In a defining moment, Rhea executed the Pumphandle Slam, driving Heather into the canvas with force. The impact resonated through the arena as Rhea hooked the leg for the pin.
Winner: Rhea Rampage via Pumphandle Slam -> Pin
Nerma: Rhea with the victory over Heather, and “Doug Doug” looks thrilled about it. Rhea just hoisted him up and is carrying him around the ring
Tommy Dukes: Maybe it would be nice to be carried?
Nerma: What?
Tommy Dukes: Just thinking out loud.
Nerma: I already carry you…at the announce table.
Tommy Dukes: Oh snap! You got me. Wait, we’re being joined at the announce table by-
Trevor Mach: Yep. It’s me!
Tommy Dukes: The World Champion Trevor Mach! The Grindhouse injuries are healing up I take it?
Trevor Mach: I used a lot of bactine, but I think I’m good! I want to see this next match up close. I don’t want to interfere though. It’s Bushido Rules. I respect the code of honor. Grind has always been above and beyond. Then he tore it up in Anahauc. I want to see what he’s got the Bushido in him
Nerma: Well it’s time to find out!
Trevor Mach: Here we go!
5. Bushido Rules Singles: Grind vs. “Trigger” Cade Yaggis
-In a Bushido Rules match that brought together the unique styles of Grind from Metal Rush and "Trigger" Cade Yaggis of Blood 4 Blood, the atmosphere was charged with anticipation. Grind, the roller-blading luchador, had become a target of the crowd's disdain for aligning with Metal Rush and reuniting with Ripper Jane. The bell rang, initiating a contest where the rules emphasized respect, technique, and the spirit of competition. Grind, adorned in his roller blades, and Cade Yaggis, known for his intense and hard-hitting style, circled each other in the center of the ring. The match began with a series of technical exchanges, with Cade showcasing his striking prowess and Grind relying on his roller-blade-enhanced agility. The crowd, divided in their sentiments, watched as Cade attempted to counter Grind's unorthodox movements, like the way he'd kip up or roll through submission attempts. As the match progressed, Cade gained the upper hand with a combination of powerful strikes and calculated submissions. The crowd rallied behind Cade, hoping to see Grind pay for his perceived betrayal. Despite Cade's control, Grind, utilizing his roller-blade dexterity, turned the tide. The momentum shifted as Grind executed a lightning-fast LITERAL Rolling Elbow, catching Cade off guard. The impact reverberated through the arena as Grind seamlessly transitioned into a Crossface, trapping Cade in a submission hold. Referee Stoppage seemed imminent as Cade, valiantly fighting the pain, found himself in a precarious situation. The referee assessed the situation, closely monitoring Cade's condition. With Cade unable to escape the relentless Crossface and showing signs of distress, the referee called for the bell, declaring Grind the winner by Referee Stoppage. The roller-blading luchador, with a mix of arrogance and triumph, celebrated his victory in the Bushido Rules match. The fallout from this intense encounter would undoubtedly leave a lasting impact on the ongoing saga between Metal Rush and Blood 4 Blood.
Winner: Grind via Literal Rolling Elbow x Crossface -> Referee Stoppage
Tommy Dukes: Grind with the win.
Trevor Mach: Good hustle Trigger! The kid has got it, he’s just a hair away every time. We’re going to push him over the edge, and just you watch.
Tommy Dukes: You’re really looking out for Yaggis.
Trevor Mach: The Triggerman can look out for himself…still…doesn’t hurt to have back up. When everything is on the line…he comes through in a pinch…save….
Nerma: You alright Trevor? Trailing off there.
Trevor Mach: I’m rad, and I’m glad I got to see what Grind can do. Feel the Rush is going to be a war, and a war needs its warriors. We’ll see Metal Rush there.
Tommy Dukes: Gonna stick around to see your best friend and brother from another mother Tack Angel and his team take on Samurai Ifri-
Trevor Mach: Nah I’m good. He’s totally winning. What’s the point of staying.
Nerma: Huh? They might not!
Trevor Mach: Guys I’m sorry…but he’s got place popper powers. This is home…and somehow that means he’ll wrestle better…I don’t know how it works. I’m Audi 5000! Later gators!
Nerma: Audi 5000?
Tommy Dukes: It’s 90’s slang?
Nerma: Is he going to get jiggy with it next?
Tommy Dukes: No no, the Willenium has passed.
Nerma: Yeah…shame about that. *sigh* Well, it’s main event time! The World Team Championship Rings are on the line, and it’s NOT as predictable and people make it out to be! Sooooo….
Tommy Dukes: LET’S TAKE IT TO THE RING!
6. EBW World Team Championships: Zyro Kurogane(c)/Seto Kaiba(c)/Kinniku Mike(c)/Isiah Muscle(c) vs. Tack Angel<Xcite>/Geoff Garrett<Xcite>/Saxon<Xcite>/Novus<Xcite>
-In a colossal World Team Championship Ring match, the Havok crowd was ready for a showdown between the reigning champions, Samurai Ifrit, and the formidable challengers, the Weekend Wrecking Crew from the Xcite Brand. The atmosphere was charged with anticipation as the teams prepared to clash in this high-stakes encounter. The Havok team, Samurai Ifrit, consisted of Zyro Kurogane, Seto Kaiba, Kinniku Mike, and Isiah Muscle. The crowd, known for their love of the Havok brand, was expected to rally behind Samurai Ifrit. However, the dim-witted nature of the crowd led to an unexpected turn of events. The challengers, the Weekend Wrecking Crew, composed of Tack Angel, Geoff Garrett, Saxon, and Novus, entered the ring to an eruption of cheers from the Havok crowd. The crowd's loyalty shifted, cheering for the Weekend Wrecking Crew, perhaps swayed by the fact that they exist in the same relative place of reality as these four mad lads. The match kicked off with a flurry of action, each team member showcasing their unique skills. Zyro Kurogane's high-flying moves, Seto Kaiba's strategic prowess, Kinniku Mike's strength, and Isiah Muscle's powerhouse style came together seamlessly against the versatile and powerful Weekend Wrecking Crew. As the match progressed, the tide shifted in favor of the challengers. The Weekend Wrecking Crew showcased their cohesion as a team, isolating members of Samurai Ifrit and unleashing a barrage of coordinated attacks. The crowd, caught in the excitement, continued to cheer for the challengers. In the closing moments of the match, Tack Angel, managed to hit his devastating Angel Driver on Isiah Muscle. He apparently started glowing due to his place popper hometown powers. The impact echoed through the arena as the referee counted the pin. 1-2-3!
Winners: Tack Angel[o]/Geoff Garrett/Saxon/Novus via Angel Driver on Isiah Muscle -> Pin -> NEW EBW World Team Champions!
Nerma: NOOOOOO!!!!
Tommy Dukes: Apparently it WAS predictable. We just lost The Rings….WE JUST LOST THE STORM!
Nerma: THIS SUCKS!
Tommy Dukes: Xcite is taking the Rings and The Storm! This really means war now!
Nerma: Look at Tack, the realization setting in that he is sharing those Team Rings with Double G, Saxon, and Novus. Tears of joy streaming down his face! He’s in the fetal position from how overly excited he is! IT’S UPSETTING TO SAY THE LEAST! I used to really like that guy too! Wholesome monogamist Tack. What was there to dislike about him?! THIS! THIS NOW! GRRRRR!!!
Tommy Dukes: Something familiar about all of this, but we don’t have time to ponder it, because that’s the end of the show. Don’t worry Xcite, we’ll strike back hard. We have Feel the Rush, but then we’re coming for Limber Mines, and we’re coming to take those Rings BACK!
The Mach Farm
Tali Mach sat in her wheelchair and watched back the Havok show on ENT. She watched repeatedly the scene where Ripper Jane made advances at Trevor. Over and over she watched it. She finally dropped the remote and lifted herself out of the chair. She stood straight up and walked over to the television, turning it off before silently staring out the window as Robo played with the kids. Then, as slowly as she got up, Tali sat back in the chair and rolled it away.
Last edited by Machismo (11/29/2023 2:44 am)
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Burglin Park - Twoson
The people of Twoson welcomed the Xcite crew with open arms as they pulled into town with a big parade. The Weekend Wrecking Crew were atop the bus, waving at everyone, except for Tack who sat inside, subconsciously petting his cat. He looked over at Makoto, who was talking with Usagi while Minako ran off behind them, giggling into the bathroom with a mysterious bag in hand. Before he had time to check it out, the bus stopped and Rick Shaw gave him the all go to greet the fans. He plastered on the smile as he went out to sign autographs and greet the fans. President Swift was already out there to address the fans.
Swift: That’s right people! Cheer it up! Xcite Brand is here, and we’ve got THE STORM! We’re giving it you Xciters, and not JUUUUST to rub it in “The Crumble’s” face, but this parade is just as much for all of you as it is for us. We’re celebrating our biggest win in the fight yet, but it’s only the beginning. Here comes the boys who made it all possible. The Weekend Wrecking Crew!
Geoff Garrett: Hey hey! Double G and the Crew are here! *Jackie Fargo strut* Let’s hear it for Saxon!
Saxon: Yeah!
Geoff Garrett: Novus!
Novus: The Crew is here baby!
Geoff Garrett: And my Tag partner! Mi compadre and amigo! Tack Angel!
Tack Angel: Uh…yeah! Sure!
Geoff Garrett: Together, we’ve got the tag straps AND the Team Rings! Next week, we’re heading to Dalaam, and two good friends are gonna ‘rassle for that Mars Championship!
Tack Angel: Itsmytitleyoucanthaveit.
Geoff Garrett: Haha! You said it buddy!
Trevor Mach: Yeah! This is gonna be great! I’m ready for THE STORM baby! BOOSH!
Tack Angel: Trevor?! What are you doing here?
Trevor Mach: Huh? What do you mean? It’s The Storm right?
Tack Angel: …Xcite has control now.
Trevor Mach: Huh? Oh yeah! The place popper crap!
Tack Angel: That’s not a real thing! That would imply I’m FROM Mid-South! Listen brother, you probably shouldn’t be here!
Trevor Mach: How come?
Tack Angel: World Champion…of Havok.
Trevor Mach: And?
Tack Angel: Xcite.
Trevor Mach: Oh! You think I can’t deal with the boos and jeers? I’m sitting in that audience! I’m telling ya Tack, the devil once whispered in my ear. He said, “Your not strong enough to withstand the storm.” You know what I did? I whispered back to the devil and I said, “You’re.”
Tack Angel: …Uh…enjoy the show?
“Power Wolf - Sainted by the Storm”
Larry Grim: Welcome to Burglin Park! It’s a beautiful day, although a dark cloud looms. No, I’m not talking about a metaphorical cloud. I’m talking about that dark cloud right over there. See it? No, we have NO REASON to be upset today, cause it’s The Storm, and The Storm is under Xcite control!
Apple Kid: That’s right! It’s our show baby! Take that Havok! It’s not a sprint, it’s a marathon, and we just kicked it up a notch! I’m not actually running though…my cardio is…well it’s poor.
Larry Grim: We’re not running, buuuut we have a great show for you in our debut, the TRUE debut of The Storm. We will see Bellerophon and her newfound strength taking on Minako Aino!
Apple Kid: Minakoooo! She’s great ain’t she?
Larry Grim: The Dan Club stable will face off with “The Story” in 6-Man Tag action. Then, we’ll see Usagi Tsukino and Makoto Kino team up to take on EBW Women’s Tag Team Champions Gianna Rambaldi and Hilda Iceheart….innon-titleaction. *cough cough* So it’s gonna be great! The main event though will see our heroes in action! The Weekend Wrecking Crew! The ones who made all of this possible! We’ll see them defend their World Team Championship Rings against the Eagleland Gladiators!
Apple Kid: I love the Glads too, but I thought we were going to see a crossover where WE go over there to take them on!
Larry Grim: Interest died down.
Apple Kid: Really? Cause I thought-
Larry Grim: Interest died down!
Apple Kid: Oh! Well alright then! This is win-win for us though, cause the Glads are Xcite branded baby!
Larry Grim: It’s gonna be a big day! I mean we even have Trevor Mach, the competition’s World Champion in the crowd!
Apple Kid: He seemed to have forgotten how this all works?
Larry Grim: Nah, the dude is shrewd. He intended to be here. I have it on good authority that he intends to have Blood 4 Blood challenge to get the Rings back.
Apple Kid: Oh yeah? What’s the source?
Trevor Mach: It’s me. I told him.
Apple Kid: Oh! You know you’re technically not supposed to be here.
Trevor Mach: Yeah, but I don’t really care.
Apple Kid: Well alright!
Larry Grim: Apple, I’m just now receiving word that Minako couldn’t make it for her match tonight.
Apple Kid: What?! But she was on the bus!
Larry Grim: I don’t know buddy, but I’m being told that she has a very suitable replacement to take on Bellerophon tonight.
Apple Kid: It won’t be the same!
Larry Grim: Trust me, it will. Let’s do it to it!
EBW: The Storm[Xcite Control]
Burglin Park, Twoson
ENN
A very Minako looking blonde came out with a slightly different costume and mask to cover her eyes. She was announced as Sailor V, who looked confident as she jumped into the ring to take on the imposing Bellerophon, a far cry from the sleek and slender lady she once was.
1. Women’s Singles: Bellerophon vs. Sailor V
-The first to make her entrance was Bellerophon, a once slender "Princess" who had transformed into an imposing enforcer for the 3Queens faction. She stepped into the ring with an air of confidence, muscles rippling under her wrestling attire. Bellerophon's opponent, the enigmatic Sailor V, made her entrance to the iconic cheers of the crowd. Not unbeknownst, but quite beknownst to the Xciters, Sailor V was none other than Minako Aino, poorly concealing her identity beneath the guise of a mysterious warrior. The audience did erupt in cheers for the beloved Sailor V, unaware of the uphill battle she was about to face. Bellerophon, with her newfound strength, took control early on, using her power to dominate the smaller Sailor V. The Princess-turned-enforcer unleashed a series of power moves, attempting to assert her dominance over the enigmatic warrior. It was like seeing a different person entirely the way she moved. Sailor V displayed resilience and skill, dodging and countering with agility and precision. As the match progressed, Sailor V's resourcefulness frustrated Bellerophon. V attempted to scoop up Bellerophon for a slam, but suddenly backed away after grabbing onto Bellerophon for some reason. This angered Bellerophon, who tossed V out of the ring and pushed Apple Kid out of his seat to hit her with a chair. A DQ finish that saw Apple Kid covering V up as Red Shirt security pulled double duty to get control of the situation.
Winner: Sailor V via DQ
Larry Grim: That went off the rails!
Apple Kid: Minak-I mean- Sailor V! Are you alright?
Sailor V: I’m fine Artemis, just five more minutes.
Apple Kid: What?!
Larry Grim: She’s uh…she’s fine! We’re uh…moving on to uh…THIS!
Backstage
Dan Club made their way to the ring, followed by Vape, who still had his hand heavily wrapped up after the events of Demon Boogie.
Vape: Jam Man, I just need you to use a coat hanger and get in there. It itches so badly!
Jammer: We did that already! I’ve lost five coat hangers in there! That can’t be good!
Vape: Nothing can be worse than having your hand degloved! Haha!
Jammer: *gags* Please stop saying that!
Vape: Honestly it’s amazing Doc was able to reattach the nerve endings.
Jammer: Took him a week of surgeries to do it, and the first thing you did was start clawing away with the hangers.
Vape: I need this cast off soon, cause I might have a hot date lined up!
Jammer: No way. What? Who? HOW?
Vape: My FBI Agent!
Jammer: …Huh?
Vape: You know how sometimes the government very secretly has us monitored by the FBI?
Jammer: “Very secretly”...right….go on?
Vape: Well I have a specific agent that takes to me through my computer, telling me to keep my webcam on and mic activated and stuff like that.
Jammer: And it’s a girl?! You should warn her that she very much doesn’t want to see all of that!
Vape: Well she needs it all on so we can talk and stuff! She used to try to convince me to shoot up my old high school to help pass gun laws, but lately we just talk about….life.
Jammer: …I think I need you to go over that first part again.
Vape: I was thinking of what lines I could say to her. Maybe something like “I need to be inside of you right now!”
Jammer: What?!
Vape: When you talk, all I picture is the skeleton inside of you.
Jammer: NO!
Vape: If you set the clock ahead, you don’t have to be alive as long!
Jammer: Unsettling and inaccurate!
Vape: Heaven must be missing an Angel, because I’m seeing one right now. You must be one because you’re glowing. Wait, does that mean you’re a ghost? I’m losing my grip on reality!
Jammer: None of that! Ever! We need to back it up a little! She tried to get you to do what?
Vape: You’re out of time buddy! It’s match time!
Jammer: We’re going to come back around to this! Jaden, throw me the rock!
Jaden Yuki: Yo! Coming at ya!
Jaden tossed a basketball at Jammer, who for a split second thought about degloving again, and lurched over to gag, the ball smashed Vape in the face, knocking him to the ground.
Vape: GAH!
Interview Stage
Good News Gary: Good News Everyone! I’m joined by Colby Roads, the Eagleland Cheese, who is just about to head out for his match against Dan Club. Colby, the Story is-
Colby Roads: Heh…let’s just calm down about the story for a second alright? That’s not all there is to me. Deep down you know I’m a nice guy. I wear the Eagleland colors cause I’m a patriot. I’m a loving husband and father….whoendedracism. I’m really just happy to be here! This is the best place to wrestle for, and we’re in the best city! Yeah! I’m not here to get anyone fired, and I’m not here to assert myself and manipulate behind the scenes. Am I here to finish…the…story? Sure! BUT…I’m also here to have a great time and wrestle for all of you wonderful fans! That’s far more important right?
Good News Gary: I’ve actually heard that you’ve gotten Rains bumped from several shows, and are attempting to have Mav Valentine fired for an altercation backstage where he refused to listen to your advice.
Colby Roads: …YOU HEARD ABOUT THAT HUH? Can you prove it?
Good News Gary: No…I can’t.
Colby Roads: Because it’s a lie! Obviously! I wouldn’t do that! I know how much everyone loves…Rains…and that Mav guy. Listen, this whole match is for THE PEOPLE! They also LOVE that Dan guy and his stup- and his friends. I already have the title shot I wanted, so it’s not like I NEED this…not like I HAVE to hurt Dan Club! Not like holding them down, I can prop myself up. I just WANT to do this…for the fans! I’m just happy to be here! Haha!
Good News Gary: …Let’s uh…head to the match now shall we?
2. 6-Man Tag: Bashin Dan/Jammer/Jaden Yuki vs. Colby Roads/LG Rod/Randy no Kachi
-The park was electric as two dynamic trios prepared to clash in a thrilling 6-man tag team match. On one side, the exuberant Dan Club, featuring Bashin Dan, Jammer, and Jaden Yuki. On the other side, the devious trio known as The Story, consisted of "Eagleland Cheese" Colby Roads, LG Rod, and Randy no Kachi. The bell rang, initiating a frenetic exchange of tags and high-flying maneuvers. Dan Club showcased their teamwork, seamlessly tagging in and out, utilizing a combination of speed and agility. The Story, however, were no slouches themselves, with Rod and Randy having years of experience. The match took an unexpected turn when CP Munk, a master of distraction, took advantage of the chaos from the outside. His antics drew Jaden Yuki's attention away from the action, leaving him vulnerable to an opportunistic attack. With Jaden momentarily distracted, Colby Roads seized the chance. The Eagleland Cheese expertly executed the Cheese Cutter, a devastating move that left Jaden Yuki flattened on the canvas. The referee quickly dropped for the count.
Winners: Colby Roads[o]/LG Rod/Randy no Kachi via Cheese Cutter on Jaden Yuki -> Pin
Larry Grim: That dastardly Pepsi drinking Chipmunk man!
Apple Kid: That’s why I prefer Coke!
Larry Grim: Yeah?
Apple Kid: …RC Cola.
Larry Grim: That sounds more accurate. You don’t…eat well. I’d recommend Vape and Jammer brand vitamins, which are just Flintstones vitamins that have been drawn on, but it didn’t seem to help the Slam Master tonight. Vape WOULD have helped I’m sure….but he was degloved.
Tack Angel: That’s horrible! Stop bringing it up!
Larry Grim: Tack? What are you doing here?
Tack Angel: I was looking for Minako! I was worried when I didn’t see her earlier!
Apple Kid: …Are you…are you serious?
Tack Angel: Yes! She’s missing, and I don’t want Makoto to worry about her friend! Her match is up next! By the way, who is that Sailor V lady?
Apple Kid: Um…I don’t think we should tell him. It’ll be funnier that way.
Tack Angel: Tell me what?
Larry Grim: That uh…up next it’s time to see the Sailor Sensations take on 3Queens in *cough*non-title*cough* tag team action!
Tack Angel: Well you just told me that! Seriously though, any ideas where Minako is?
Apple Kid: …Try the last place you saw Sailor V.
Tack Angel: Why?
Apple Kid: No reason. *snicker*
3. Women’s Non-Title Tag: Usagi Tsukino/Makoto Kino vs. Gianna Rambaldi/Hilda Iceheart
-Next up, the dynamic duo of Usagi Tsukino and Makoto Kino stepped into the ring to face the formidable EBW Women's Tag Team Champions, Gianna Rambaldi and Hilda Iceheart, representing the dominant faction, 3Queens. Usagi and Gianna kicked things off for their respective teams, engaging in a series of back-and-forth exchanges. Usagi showcased her agility with swift dodges and quick counters, while Gianna relied on her technical prowess to gain the upper hand. As the match progressed, Makoto Kino and Hilda Iceheart tagged in, bringing their strength and power into the fray. The ring shook with the impact of their strikes and suplexes, each woman aiming to assert dominance for her team. Despite the champions' experience and cohesion, Usagi Tsukino, fueled by the support of the crowd, mounted a comeback. The momentum shifted in favor of the underdog team as Usagi managed to evade Hilda's offense and make the crucial tag to Makoto. With the crowd rallying behind them, Usagi and Makoto executed a seamless combination of double-team maneuvers. The ring was alive with energy as the challengers gained control, keeping Hilda Iceheart on the defensive. In a surprising turn of events, Usagi Tsukino climbed the turnbuckle and soared through the air, executing a Moonsault that caught Gianna Rambaldi off guard. The impact left Gianna sprawled on the canvas as Usagi went for the cover.
Winners: Usagi Tsukino[o]/Makoto Kino via Moonsault on Gianna Rambaldi -> Pin
Apple Kid: Whoa! Usagi with the pinfall! She and Makoto win?! They beat the EBW Women’s Tag Team Champions!
Larry Grim: Absolutely! A shocking upset! Erica won’t be happy about that one! In fact here she comes! She wants to take out Usagi ahead of RRR, but here comes Christina Angel, Ami, and Rei to stand in her way!
Apple Kid: Two cats too! I’m seeing a lot of cats around here! Wait, Erica is grabbing a microphone. What does she have to say?
Erica: Usagi…a pretty wannabe princess. You don’t understand how hard it truly is being what I am. I am a Queen. I am THE Queen. The journey I went through to get back on top. Ask Christina over there, and she’ll tell you. She’ll gloat about it, in painstaking detail, how she derailed my Queendom, and tainted women’s wrestling with her filth. You skirted destiny, while I refuse to give mine up. I know all about you Usagi. I have a source…a Prince Charming of my own. A recently divorced Prince Charming you might say, and he’ll be in my corner in Dalaam.
Usagi Tsukino: What? What is she talking about?
Ami Mizuno: Oh Usagi, it seems pretty obvious what she means.
Usagi Tsukino: It’s lost on me. What is she-
Suddenly, a rose landed in the middle of the ring.
Usagi Tsukino: …Something very familiar about that.
Rei Hino: Usagi!
Christina Angel: If it helps, I don’t get it either. *shrugs*
Backstage
Good News Gary: Good News? I’m here with the CXJ Champion Johnny Starbound, who I’m told is responsible for no CXJ Division matches on the show tonight!
Johnny Starbound: It wouldn’t have mattered if we had one or not. I would have lost by DQ again. It’s all planned out. It’s fake. You can’t bounce off ropes all the time without exposing how fake it all is. I mean my 450 is flawless, but it looks even better when the guy I’m wrestling won’t move, and intends to kick out at tw-
Swift: You!
Johnny Starbound: Sup President! Great show, especially without the fake division to-
Swift: I know who you’ve been talking to.
Johnny Starbound: …..
Swift: I know who you serve you little *bleep*!
Johnny Starbound: Oh yeah? What of it?
Swift: Either you end this facade…or I will.
Johnny Starbound: Facade? The only facade is that the CXJ Division was worth bringing back. Who needs a fake division of high fliers when half the supposed “heavyweights” as 5’7 180lb nothings doing flippies anyways! Don’t worry, the CXJ Champion will continue “tow the line” and do what you tell me to do. The result of the RRR match is already in the bag.
Swift: Oh yeah? How does it end? Go ahead and tell the people!
Johnny Starbound: Heh…nice try. Fake or not, I still want my payday in Dalaam.
Swift: …He’s on thin ice, and I’m about to break out the flamethrower.
4. World Team Championship Rings: Tack Angel(c)/Geoff Garrett(c)/Saxon(c)/Novus(c) vs. Sabre/Turbo/Tower/Laser
-Main event time, as the World Team Championship Rings were on the line. The Weekend Wrecking Crew, were up against the formidable challengers, the Eagleland Gladiators. The tension in the arena was thhhhiiiiick as the competitors eyed each other, and gave the Xciters a little taste of the gun show. The match immediately erupted into chaos as all eight competitors engaged in an exhilarating exchange of moves. The champions utilized their well-honed teamwork, while the challengers showcased their resilience and determination to unseat the reigning titleholders. As the match progressed, the action spilled to the outside, with high-flying maneuvers, power slams, and quick tags keeping the audience on the edge of their seats. Each team displayed a unique blend of styles, creating a captivating spectacle that showcased the best of tag team wrestling. In a pivotal moment, Tack Angel, the proud leader of the Weekend Wrecking Crew, found himself face-to-face with Laser. He stopped himself for a moment, almost as if he was wondering why he was working so hard for something he didn't want to be apart of, but that was probably just to lull Laser into a false sense of security. Laser came in with a tackle, but Tack on instinct hit a hard head kick to stall him for the Angel Driver and the pin. The Weekend Wrecking Crew retained!
Winners: Tack Angel[o]/Geoff Garrett/Saxon/Novus via Angel Driver on Laser -> Pin -> Title Defense!
Larry Grim: The Weekend Wrecking Crew wreck another weekend for their competitors and continue their incredible run as one of the most popular and successful teams on the Xcite Brand! Tack is just throwing his arms up as everyone struts around him. He must have had a lot of confidence in his team, and knew the win was in the bag.
Apple Kid: We’re off to Dalaam now, where we’ll see you for Xcite and THEN the big event “RRR” where our EBW Champion will have his biggest test to date! We’ll see you then!
Last edited by Machismo (12/06/2023 1:47 pm)
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Ted Pettentool: Well hey there EBW fans! The Tool box himself, Ted Pettentool is here! Ya know, sometimes I have dreams where I was dead! Anyways, what an incredible week it was for EBW, and we’re not done yet, as EBW heads back to Metal Rush territory for a big battle in the ongoing war in Havok. Feel the Rush! will see the Women’s World Championship in the main event, as Hope Mach attempts to wrest the best from Paula, after playing the long game against Wendy Mustang for a couple months. She doesn’t need to be able to read minds to know what Hope Mach is thinking or what she’s capable of. A multi-time champ in singles and tag competition, Hope Mach has had an accomplished career during Paula’s off time, but one of the OGs of the division, Paula is still proving herself to be a top level athlete. She played the long game in that way too if you think about it. While most of her peers are worn down or wheelchair bound from years of wear, tear, and abuse, Paula is healthy and strong. A big event going down on ENT+. but over on ENN we’ll see the Xcite Brand head off to Dalaam for not only a special episode of Xcite, also their own special Rise Roar Revolt! During that show, Rama Raju, the Fire, will face his toughest challenge yet! He’ll be facing off with Troy, Colby Roads, and Jackson Kain! He doesn’t even have to be a part of the result to lose the title! Will this be his downfall as champ, or his finest hour in front of his people in Dalaam? Guess you’ll have to order it and find out eh? Point being both of the brand exclusive shows are looking to test the waters for many more in the future. That being said, we’ll all come back together at the end of the year for….
Embrace the Fire - Ledenback
Ted Pettentool: That’s right, Last Clash 2023 is going to close out the year….like always! We’ll be in Saturn City to watch the ball drop, with the last battle of 2023 and the first of 2024! It’s going to be a blast, as Xcite and Havok collide one last time in the year, and even those pictured are NOT the champs going into the show, BOTH the World Championship and the EBW Championship will be on the line! You can’t miss THAT show! Don’t miss any of them! If you do, I’d be out of the job! I’m the hype man! I don’t know squat about the product, I just have to be enthusiastic about it! I don’t know anything, but I’m glad you’re having fun. You having fun is like me having fun! For reals!
EBW: Last Clash 2023
Outside of the Saturn Dome, Saturn City
ENN/ENT
1. ”Last Match of 2023” [Havok] World Championship: TBA vs. TBA
2. ”First Match of 2024” [Xcite] EBW World Championship: TBA vs. TBA
The Mach Farm
Trevor shot out of bed in a cold sweat. He was panting and heaving in a sudden panic as he heard the screams. They were just off in the distance. He looked out into the night, and saw something not too far off illuminated in blazing fire. He quickly jumped out of bed, threw on his leather jacket, and hopped onto his motorcycle. He charged down the country road, heading closer to Smalltown, as the flames grew higher. He knew what it was, but he couldn’t believe it until he saw it with his own eyes. As he pulled up to the scene of destruction, his heart sank.
Trevor Mach: …O-oh no.
In front of him, the Church that had become so important to him was engulfed in fire. Geoff Garrett and Brother Tiburon were not far behind as they arrived at the shocking scene as well. Trevor tried to calm his breathing, relax his chest and pray, but he was filled with painful anxiety, anger, and aggression. Who could have done this? As the three bowed their heads to mourn, a figure standing not too far off, sat back down in a wheelchair, and disappeared into a corn field.